Page 20 of Just A Little Joy

Travis

Not a boy.

Gabe

YOU said you knew you wouldn’t be happy long-term without one.

Levi

I spent three years with someone who wasn’t, and it wasn’t the *only* reason we split, but it was a huge part of it.

It makes a difference even if you think you can get by without it.

Travis

You’re not wrong.

Gabe

You can say we’re right. It won’t hurt.

Travis

It kinda will.

Reed

Don’t worry about finding anyone. Just come and enjoy the company of friends.

Travis

Yeah, you’re right. I’ll be there.

“There you are,sir. Enjoy your evening,” the attendant said, finishing the placement of the paper bracelets on my wrist before motioning for me to head through to the next area of the club.

As it turned out, I’d had to cover at least half a shift, so I was later than I expected. Everything was already in full swing.

I made my way down the long hallway until I reached the area where the littles usually gathered with their Daddies. As usual, Owen had outdone himself with the decorations. With vintage red and gold colors, velvet draping, and real Christmas trees covered in red glass ornaments and dripping with lights, the space looked like the inside of an old-fashioned train car. I had no idea how much they paid Owen to pull this off so many times a year, but the man was an absolute fucking genius when it came to transforming a space.

A quick scan of the room didn’t give me the surprise I was hoping for. I’d know it wouldn’t happen, but part of me still wished Casey might be there. It would’ve been my own little Christmas miracle.

With no luck there, I spotted the usual gaggle of Daddies sitting on the sofas with drinks in hand and dodged giggling boys on my way over to join them.

“Damn, I thought you were gonna skip out on us after all,” Gabe said with a welcoming smile.

“I ended up having to cover half a shift, but I made it.” I sat and realized I’d forgotten to order a drink on my way in. Goddammit. Now I’d have to get up again, and I was bone-tired tonight.

Since those hot-as-fuck kisses in my car a week ago, Casey and I had been polite strangers, and I hated it. The mental toll of it wore me down, and the worst part was that a small, selfish part of me hoped it bothered him too. But he wasn’t wrong. He was my employee, and I was his boss. Fooling around in a car had been one of the worst ideas I’d had in a long time, even if it had felt like the best.

Lines blurred every time he looked at me like I was something safe, and I kept pretending I was not crossing them already.

“You’re here now, which means we can find a boy for you,” Reed said. He scanned the room as if there might be a boy holding up a sign that saidPerfect for Travis: Inquire Here.

Sadly, when I looked that way, there were no boys to be found. Their stuff was all over the table—half-colored pages, sippy cups, the usual—but no boys.

“They abandoned us to go do crafts,” Gabe said.

“Oh. Did you not want to join them?” I asked, puzzled. In my Daddy dreams, doing things with my boy was always part of the picture.