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Chapter Twelve

D r. Drayke sun Omrun

I’m about to fall asleep when I return from my lust-induced stupor to think about what’s going on in the rest of the ship right now. Braxxus! Braxxus is, I hope, in medbay. If not, he’s in the morgue. I ease Nova’s head off my chest as well as her leg from where it’s slung over my thighs, then bound out of bed and grab my clothes.

I remember I’m still suffering from bonding sickness. What happened just now gave me a respite from the insistent arousal, it did not eradicate it. I grab the loincloth and bind it tightly, then pull on my blue jumpsuit.

“You sleeping, Nova?” I whisper.

“Not quite.” Her voice sounds tight.

“You okay?”

“Just tired.”

Something is definitely off. “Are you upset I’m leaving? I need to check on Braxxus, unless he’s…”

“He’s very ill, but he’s still alive. You should go to him.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? What just happened here was the... definitely was the best moment of my life, Sweet. But I need to check on Braxxus.”

“I understand, Drayke. He’s dying. Please go to him and do what you can.”

I smooth my hair, not wanting to look like I just jumped out of bed with Nova, then take off for medbay at a jog.

I’m already in professional-physician mode by the time I race through the medbay doors. Axxios is at Braxxus's bedside. If anything, the male in the bed looks worse than when I last saw him on Aeon II.

I grab the medpad and check his vitals. His pulse is thready, his blood pressure is dangerously depressed, he’s panting.

“What have you done for him?”

“None of us have any medical training, doc. They’re all gladiators. I’m a pilot. We figured out how much Amdrol to give him for the pain. We’ve washed him as well as possible without hauling him into the shower. I thought that might kill him.”

“He’d lain in his own urine, that took its toll. So his flesh is clean?”

“Yes.”

“How much Amdrol and when was the last dose?”

“One of the premeasured syringes, right before you came in.”

“I want to apologize about my lack of responsiveness...”

“Doc, we understand. You were unable to do anything about your condition. Let’s not waste precious time discussing it.”

“Okay. I’m instructing the medbot to administer fluids as well as liquid nutrition. When all this is over, I’m going to give an in-service on these basic things. There should be more than one being on board who knows how to do this.”

The bot begins its job; soon Braxxus is being fed and hydrated.

“The most serious medical problem is the deep stab wound on his back. His health is so compromised I would normally advise against surgery on an individual this ill. However, if we don’t intervene soon we’ll...we’re going to lose him. You make the call, Axxios. He’s your brother.”

“What would you do if he were your brother?”

“Surgery. Without a doubt. I definitely don’t think he’ll survive without it.”

“Then go ahead.” He takes a deep breath, then rubs the back of his neck, his mouth drawn into a thin line.

We’re both startled when Nova enters. It looks like she’s taken a quick shower. She’s so beautiful she takes my breath away.

“I came to help. But…” she gives me a questioning glance, “Drayke if you can’t tolerate me nearby…?”

Opening the First Gate seems to have put some of my protective instincts on hold, at least for the moment. I’m not growling and she’s less than ten fiertos away from two unbonded males, even though one is comatose.

“Stay.” I indicate the corner. “Perhaps you could pull a chair over there and help if I ask.” I’m calmer now that she’s here.

I program the medbot for surgery and we move him into the operating room. We gently flip him onto his stomach; the putrefying flesh assails my nose.

Two of the three medbots begin their work, first cleaning the wound site, then delving in with instruments. I position myself out of the robot arms’ way and attend some of the less serious wounds on his back. I clean and then debride about eight wounds while the medbot works on the most serious injury. I use analgesic salve to coat the areas, then begin to strip away the dying skin, dead tissue, and crusting that surrounds each one. I use a variety of surgical tools as well as pressurized water. When I’m done I apply plas-film imbedded with additional antiseptic.

I had to check my medpad twice to make sure the readings weren’t in error. It looks like each of his long bones—arms and legs—has been broken and repaired dozens, dare I say hundreds of times? It looks like torture that went on for months. I’ll find the right time to inform Axxios later.

The smell in the room is horrific. It’s a barbaric procedure. I glance over at Nova from time to time, but she sits quietly. I know she’d rather be anywhere else than here, and I’m unsure why she stays. If I didn’t need to be here, I wouldn’t be. She’s a good female. I’m lucky she’s agreed to be my bonded mate.

I’ve asked her to make several trips to the trash jettison area. Each time I’ve removed the putrid dead skin from one wound I get it out of the room. It smells better with each passing minima .

The medbots are performing as expected. I watch their progress on the medpad. I explain to Axxios what the medscans indicate. “The bot is cleaning, cauterizing and stitching the internal cuts in various affected organs. Soon it will be applying antiseptic med packs that will provide time-release antibiotics internally, then get absorbed by the body and disappear. The surgery is going well.”

Nova quietly sits and watches, her heels up on the edge of her chair. She seems content to wait. Brianna shows up, I assume to support Axxios. Out of all the male/female pairs on board ship, these two always struck me as the least closely bonded. After the insurrection, I don’t believe they’ve slept in the same room together. I’m surprised she’s visiting him and his twin in medbay, but she looks quite concerned.

Nova

I’ve just been sitting here, watching Drayke save Braxxus's life. I’m watching his long, slim, surgeon’s fingers move with the skill of Earth’s most acclaimed pianist. He’s such an extraordinary male. I’m so lucky to have met him. I have his very life in my hands. And I refuse to rescue him.

Look at him. Doing everything possible for Braxxus, a male he's barely spoken a word to. I’m an awful person. Why won’t I agree to save his life?

Because I can’t. I can’t exchange my life for his. If I give up the rest of my life to bond with him against my will, what would that accomplish? I would resent him. He would grow bitter at my resentment. Worse than that, he’s such a fine male; I think his guilt over my unhappiness would eat him alive. No, it would accomplish nothing. If I opened all three Gates with him, we’d both be miserable for the rest of our lives... and beyond.

I’m deep in thought as I watch Drayke work on Braxxus. Despite all that hangs in the balance, what I’m thinking about is tonight. The big question is whether I should open the Second Gate with him. If I do, it will give us a little more time—give him a little more time. He’ll have a few more hours to decide if he wants to commit sanctu , or just sink deeper into madness.

But way in the back of my mind my greedy thoughts are spinning out of control. Here I am, just about to sentence a male I care deeply about to a horrible fate, and I’m wondering if I can have one more night of pleasure with him. I’m the galaxy’s worst human. Maybe I deserved being kidnapped and forced to fight in far arenas.

He looks over at me and slants me a shy smile. “Nova, this must be horrible for you. Do you want to go back to your room? Grace or Brianna could show you how to watch vids.”

Yep, I’m an A-number-one villain. He’s concerned about my smallest comfort and I’m unconcerned about his ultimate fate. I should have died in the dirt on Bellona.

“No, babe. I’ll stay here with you.” I don’t know how I keep my voice so light and breezy.

The medbot arms stops working on Braxxus and retract into their wall holsters.

“Perfect timing,” Drayke announces. “I’m just finishing up. I’ve cleaned all the small wounds and covered them with antibiotic plas-film.” He pulls off his gloves and consults the medpad for long moments. “The deep stab wound the medbot’s been working on will require some additional work in a few days. The bot will have to go in and do some revisions it just couldn’t complete today because of the extreme amount of blood and swelling. It won’t be nearly as dangerous as what we did today. But it’s imperative that it be performed when the swelling goes down.”

He looks so proud of himself. And happy. In his world, he just saved a life and now he’s going to spend time with the female he’s bonded with. In reality, he’s going to slip into insanity in a few hours, days at the most. I catalog every traitor I’ve ever read about: Benedict Arnold, Mata Hari, Tokyo Rose, Brutus, and me. I seriously wonder how I’m going to live with this guilt and self-loathing. Then I remind myself Drayke would never want me to bind myself to him against my will.

My mind spins, going round and round and coming to no conclusions. Then my brain simply shuts down.

Axxios gives me an inscrutable look; is he wondering about the Second Gate?

“I’m going to take a quick shower,” Drayke announces. “Back in five.” He steps into the adjoining restroom.

When we hear the water running, Axxios asks, “What are you going to do?”

“About what?” As if I don’t know.

“If you don’t open the Second Gate with him tonight he might not be able to perform the second part of the surgery when it’s needed.”

My jaw tightens and I want to flay him alive with my words. “I don’t need one more ounce of guilt laid on me Axxios. Not one more fucking ounce of pressure!” The water turns off in the other room. Axxios seems about to say something else, but I put my hands up in a “stop” motion and hiss, “Shut the fuck up! No more!” He stares at the floor, looking guilty. Good.