Page 20 of Everything After (Everything Trilogy)

LILY

The day after Jack left, I woke to Elle’s call with a start after crying for most of the night.

“Hello,” I croaked.

“Hey, are you okay?”

A wave of emotion swamped my throat when I remembered what had happened and I had to swallow it back.

“Not really,” I croaked in a sleepy tone. Lifting my cell phone away from my face I cleared my throat, then listened again.

“Drew spoke to Alfie… and Jack might have had a conversation with me,” Elle admitted.

I guessed from her tone that she knew Alfie and I had fought. Part of me felt relieved that I didn’t need to tell her that, but I also felt deeply embarrassed about it.

“Drew and Lorrie are going to take the kids to the zoo. I’m coming over to keep you company.”

“No, Elle, really. Your family comes first. I’ll be fine.”

“I know you will, you always are. But I want to see my friend… besides any excuse to escape sticky fingers and chasing after little legs all day sounds like paradise,” she mumbled, chuckling.

I smiled, then grew concerned when I remembered my upset stomach. “Don’t come,” I blurted. “I’ve caught some kind of stomach bug. I’ve been sick for the past twenty-four hours.”

“Sick?”

“Yeah, vomiting. I think it was the chicken wrap I ate on the plane.”

“I’ve never known anyone with such a sensitive stomach,” she mumbled. Our conversation paused for a few beats before she spoke again. “You know what? I’ll risk it. I’d rather catch something than spend another day here with this lot without a little respite.”

“Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t come if I wasn’t desperate to see you,” she stated with a smile in her tone.

“Then you’ll be most welcome. Let me know when you’re coming across the water.”

“Good grief, you look rough,” Elle said as she swept into my kitchen and dumped a soup and sandwich take-out lunch on the countertop. “I picked this up on the way because I figured you’d skipped breakfast.”

The smell of the lentil soup, even in their containers, set my stomach rolling. Bolting from the kitchen to the downstairs bathroom, I dropped to my knees and vomited yet again.

“Jeez, was it something I said?” Elle teased from the doorway. “Poor you. You don’t have the runs as well, do you?”

“No, no runs. It’s weird because after I’m sick, I feel fine again,” I muttered, climbing back to my feet.

“Hm.” Elle studied me carefully for a moment. “This sickness, it just happens, and you don’t feel nauseated afterward? You’re not pregnant, are you?”

I scoffed. “God, no. I have an IUD inserted.”

“Since when?” she asked with brows bunched.

“Around seven… maybe eight years,” I muttered. “They’re good up to ten I think.”

“Depends on the type,” Elle muttered, casting another glance at my appearance.

“Are your boobs sensitive or do they feel bigger?”

“I. Am. Not. Pregnant!” I insisted.

Elle shook her head, studying me like she wasn’t convinced.

“I don’t know, Lily. I’d be taking a test if I were in your shoes.

What you’re describing doesn’t sound like food poisoning to me,” she said, pulling her cell phone out.

Her eyes narrowed as she scrolled and began to text, her lip caught between her teeth in concentration.

“Who are you texting?”

“No one,” she said, stealing a glance toward me. “I’m ordering a drone delivery from Walmart.”

“Delivery?”

“Yeah, two different brands of pregnancy testing kits.”

“I’m not pregnant,” I insisted, the thought of that, especially right then with Alfie and I apart, made me feel distressed to the point where I found it hard to breathe again.

“Then you won’t mind indulging me because the worst that can happen is I’d lose around thirty bucks.

” Turning on her heels. Elle walked back to the kitchen expecting me to follow.

I didn’t… well not straight away, instead I stared blankly at my pale, shocked face in the mirror, and considered the possibility that my friend might be right.

Elle and I’d stared at those two pink lines on the pregnancy test. My gut fell to the floor, and I burst into tears. Panic set in to the point where I couldn’t think and I was suddenly breathless, like I was suddenly trapped in a room full of flames and there was no way out.

“I’m not! I can’t be,” I’d screamed as my nervous eyes flitted between Elle’s and the stick I still held in my hand. My head shook rapidly in denial that I was pregnant because it was the worst possible time for it to happen.

“Are too,” she muttered, nodding. “Sometimes the universe gives you what you didn’t know you needed.”

“Quit with the flippant remarks,” I hollered while tears pricked my eyes. “I can’t have a baby. I’m not ready.”

“Then you shouldn’t have had sex.”

“Are you joking? Stop behaving like this is funny. It’s not.”

Elle chuckled. “It kind of is,” she argued. “Aw come on, think about it. These two will grow up close friends.” Elle waved a finger between her obvious baby bump and my flat stomach. I bet you’re having a girl. Hell, maybe they’ll be another Jack and Lily situation.”

“Stop planning,” I snapped. “I can’t possibly have a baby right now. Work is full on and Alfie’s—”

“Jesus, Drew is right about you,” she muttered, wide-eyed like she’d just had a revelation.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you sacrifice what you’ve got with Alfie for the good of the band.”

“No, I don’t,” I argued sounding indignant.

“Fuck, listen to yourself. I can’t have a baby right now. What about Alfie? It’s his baby too—or is it?”

My jaw dropped because this was Elle, probably the only other person in the world I figured knew me well enough to form an opinion I’d listen to without question. Yet, there I was being backed into a corner and forced to see my life through her eyes.

My heart stopped for a beat. “How can you even ask me that?” I questioned in a whisper.

“Because the way you’re behaving is like this isn’t a gift. This baby wasn’t planned,” she said, rubbing her own bump. “But I can’t wait to meet him. You know why? Because he’s made from love. He’s an extension of Drew and I, and he’s going to be an amazing brother to Ilisha and Duncan.”

“Well, good for you. You don’t have a band depending on you though, do you?”

“Fuck, Lily, wake up. XrAid performed before you were one of them and I’m sure Cody can front the band alone until you figure your family life out. No one’s asking you to quit what you do. You’re having a fucking baby, that’s all.”

“Don’t tell Drew, he’d tell Alfie,” I blurted, alarmed at that thought.

“I’m not keeping it from Drew, but he wouldn’t say anything to Alfie. That’s your job… or are you considering not keeping it?”

“This is… it’s all too sudden and surreal… I need to think,” I said, placing a palm on my forehead as I paced the floor.

“Yeah, and you make those thoughts long and hard because some decisions you make in life can’t be undone,” Elle stated with a note of finality to it.

“I expected you to be more supportive,” I muttered quietly, feeling more distressed by the second.

“This is me supporting you. This is me trying to wake you up so that you can see what a wonderful life is waiting for you, no matter whether you play music or not.”

“I won’t be forced into anything,” I stated bluntly. Not really knowing what that meant myself.

“No one’s forcing you. But the reality is that you’re pregnant.

You were there and willing when it happened.

You have a husband that loves you but has taken the desperate step to leave because you can’t see what’s in front of you.

And… I might as well say it, from where I’m standing, you think more of Lennie, Cody, Shawn and Digs than you do your amazing husband. ”

“I do not,” I ground out, affronted by her accusation.

“Then fucking prove it. Stop giving the band priority and start paying attention to your husband.”

The conversation between Elle and I went downhill, and she left shortly afterwards.

We hadn’t fallen out, but during our friendship there had been times, mostly in our teens, when we hadn’t seen eye-to-eye, and at those times she’d always gone home.

This time was no different. But she had given me plenty to think about.

For hours after she’d gone, I’d stared at the positive test results and decided that even though I had no idea what I wanted to do right then, that Alfie would need to be told.

I picked up my cell phone with my heart in my mouth and swiped to unlock it. Once I’d hit speed dial on Alfie’s number, I took a deep breath and waited for the call to connect.

“The number is unable to take your call right now. Please try later.” Fuck. I hadn’t even gone to voicemail because it was full.

I called Drew.

“Drew, do you know where Alfie is?”

“Sorry, Lily. I was looking for him myself today, but his voicemail is full.”

“Yeah, I just got that too. Even my text messages wouldn’t go through. I’m wondering if he’s somewhere that’s out of range. Anyway, I’ll call the other guys,” I said, concluding the call, thinking if Elle had told Drew at least he was keeping it quiet.

An hour later, I’d called around to all our friends and exhausted my contacts, but even his record company couldn’t help. All I could do was keep trying and pray he’d reach out to me.