Page 36 of Ensnared by the Pack: The Complete Series (Destined Realms #3)
AUDREY
Bishop led me out of Whil’s strange English cottage greenhouse and my gaze instantly jumped to the majestic mountains towering close behind it. They were so much like the mountains in Oregon where I’d grown up and yet?—
My gaze lifted to the two moons hanging in the sky. One was white and looked like “the moon,” the other was a smaller pinker version. I was definitely not in Oregon anymore, or even in my own realm, and I couldn’t even pretend I was.
We headed around the side of the alpha’s residence which looked like an enormous Mediaeval castle complete with multiple wings and turrets and into Old Town. Unlike yesterday, Bishop took the direct path down the twisted, sloping main street and avoided the warren of narrow streets and hidden gardens. We quickly passed through the main gate in the large stone wall surrounding Stonehaven’s original buildings and headed into New Town.
The hospital turned out to be a large, square building just off the main street. Its stone blocks were smaller than the blocks that made up the alpha’s residence, but bigger than the buildings closer to the outskirts of town, suggesting the building wasn’t hundreds of years old like Old Town, but still not new. There were also two new additions — one much newer than the other if the brick size was anything to go by — indicating that the community kept adding to its facilities as the pack’s population grew.
We avoided the large courtyard with the wide doors at the front of the building that looked a lot like the entrance to the emergency area and instead entered through a modest foyer with a dozen comfortable-looking chairs and a wide reception desk.
Two young women sat behind the desk and they brightened when they saw Bishop. Then their attention slid to me. The younger of the two, a blond with short curly hair, kept her smile, while the other woman, also blond but with long hair, glowered for a split second before plastering on a smile so bright it hurt to look at her.
Yeah, Bishop had definitely left a trail of broken hearts — or hopeful hearts — behind him.
“Nova will be checking on the more serious patients,” he said, nodding at the women and walking past them toward a staircase.
They both frowned as if they’d hoped he’d stop and talk— or rather flirt. I suspected if I hadn’t been with him, he would have, and I had a bad feeling I was making enemies in my possibly-new pack just by being with him.
“If we can’t find her at the nurses’ station,” he continued, “we can wait for her in the breakroom.”
We went up to the second floor and down a long hall with plain white walls and a polished stone floor. It didn’t have the institutional feel that hospitals in my realm had, but it was clearly designed to be practical and easily cleaned.
Wooden doors with windows lined the hall. Some stood open, some were closed, but almost all of them were for single-bed patient rooms. I didn’t get a good look inside — or Bishop would have left me behind — but the equipment looked basic, suggesting this society wasn’t as advanced as mine. Save for the lights, which turned on and off with a switch, nothing else indicated that they had electricity… which meant the lights were probably magical.
Men and women, mostly in loose, pale blue shirts and pants that looked a lot like scrubs, moved up and down the hall, coming and going from rooms.
We were just about to reach a T-intersection at the end of the hall when we passed a room with an enormous man in the doorway. He turned and I realized it was Finn, the pack’s head of security.
His piercing blue eyes widened at seeing us then narrowed and he stepped into the hall. “Just the man I needed to talk to,” he said to Bishop.
Bishop glanced toward the T-intersection and sighed. “The nurses’ station is just around the corner. I’ll catch up in a minute.”
“Sure.” I didn’t want to stand around listening to Bishop talk business with his beta, but I was still uncertain about being around strangers by myself. Hell, even being around people I knew used to be dangerous, which was why unless I’d been meeting my best friend, Mila, I’d stayed at home.
“What’s she doing here?” Finn asked once I’d rounded the corner.
His voice was low and I had to strain to hear it, but the edge in his tone made me stop on the other side of the corner to listen.
I didn’t know what kind of man Finn was. Sure, he might have been one of the wolves who’d saved me during the grimalkin attack, but that didn’t mean he liked me, and from the sound of it, he didn’t.
I also didn’t know if it was worse that he’d more or less been pleasant to me during dinner the other night and hadn’t shown me how he really felt or not. At least with my old pack, I knew no one liked me and they made no attempt to hide it. I couldn’t risk assuming that because people here were polite to me, I was safe.
“I thought Nova was taking care of her at the Residence,” Finn added.
“I thought I’d show her our medical facilities,” Bishop replied, his tone neutral and thankfully not announcing to the other man that we thought I might be in heat and was going to talk to Nova about birth control. Because Nova had been right. My reproductive cycle wasn’t anyone’s business but mine and hers and whoever I picked to get me through it.
“So now you’re showing her the facilities?” Finn’s tone turned exasperated. “Does Cyrus really have his sights set on her for his mate? You know the pack will never accept someone so weak.”
His words stung. They shouldn’t have. I hadn’t been accepted before so it was foolish to think I’d be accepted now. And really! Cyrus wasn’t interested in me as a mate and I wasn’t interested in him… at least not for a permanent relationship.
I was smart enough to know someone like him never mated with someone like me, especially when any other woman in this pack would make a better choice.
I couldn’t even fantasize about someone powerful coming along who wanted to mate with me and protect me. Not that I’d fantasized about that a lot, but Royce had made it perfectly clear when he’d faked our fated mating call and then tried to sacrifice me to a monster that no one with any kind of power would ever be interested in me.
My weakness was why Knox had rejected me right from the beginning and why he hated me so much. The weakest wolf in existence had forced a mating bond with him. I’d hate me too if I were him.
Which was logical and true and made my chest and throat tighten.
No one wanted me, and I couldn’t convince myself the thought came from Knox rejecting our unwanted bond. His rejection only made the truth perfectly clear.
“Cyrus is strong enough to hold the alpha’s position by himself,” Bishop said, surprising me by not agreeing with Finn as well as not denying that Cyrus was interested in me becoming his mate. “He doesn’t need a strong mate to help.”
“But he’ll lose all respect if he picks someone so weak and he’ll be challenged for leadership,” Finn replied, his tone shifting from anger to worry. “I’m sure once she stops looking like she’s been beaten up she’s cute and all, but we know nothing about her. She hasn’t even shifted out her injuries, which means she’s either vying for sympathy or doesn’t have the strength to do a proper shift when she’s hurt. Neither is good for an alpha’s mate. Their pups could be powerless too and then there’d be a question of succession.”
“She might be practically human,” a new, masculine voice said. “But I heard she faced off with a grimalkin to protect a bunch of kids. That says something about the type of woman she is.”
“Doesn’t mean she’d make a good alpha’s mate,” Finn shot back. “Doesn’t mean she’d make anyone a good mate. Would you want her to be the mother of your pups?”
“Well, I—” the new voice began.
“Of course not. No one would,” Finn answered for him.
The icy hollowness inside me surged, crushing my chest. I fought to breathe as tears burned my eyes. No one wanted me. No one had ever wanted me.
The emotions are just Knox rejecting the bond. It’s just Knox.
But I couldn’t convince myself of that. The cold kept growing, devouring me from the inside. I was useless and weak.
Bishop and Whil had said there was a place for me here, but they were the only ones who believed that. My life in this pack wouldn’t be any different than with my old pack and once my bond with Knox was broken, Cyrus and Bishop would kick me to the curb or turn me into their personal slave like Merrick had.
Except that was only if my bond with Knox could be broken and if I survived breaking it.
Maybe it would be better for everyone if I didn’t survive. If I ended things now, the guys wouldn’t have to risk their lives going to the death god’s altar.
Maybe my father hadn’t been weak when he’d taken his life. Maybe he’d just realized the truth: that everyone would be better off without him.
Except I hadn’t been better off. Merrick had taken advantage of my ten-year-old naivety and used me. His son, Sterling, had used me, too. No one had been around to protect me and no one ever would.
Damn it.
Tears rolled down my cheeks and I furiously swiped them away.
I was stronger than this. I’d survived for years as the lowest of the low in my pack.
And what I felt was just the God damned bond.
I shoved away from the wall and Finn’s hurtful words, not bothering to listen to the rest of the conversation. Being weak didn’t mean I was helpless. I’d proven that facing off against that grimalkin — even if that grimalkin would have killed me if Knox hadn’t saved me. Knox and I would break our bond, and if this pack couldn’t accept me as a person then I’d find some place that would.
I’d survived almost being sacrificed to a monster. I could sure as hell survive this.