Page 138 of Ensnared by the Pack: The Complete Series (Destined Realms #3)
AUDREY
We ate breakfast, cleaned up our campsite for the next travelers, and repacked our travel packs. Once again, Cyrus wouldn’t let me walk — even to go to the bathroom in the house at the back of the shelter, and I had to sneak a moment when his back was turned to stand on my bruised foot to see how it was doing.
It was still achy, but not nearly as bad as yesterday morning. Although I had no doubt it wouldn’t be happy hiking for three or four days. Perhaps it would feel better tomorrow morning after another full day of being off it.
Cyrus opened the heavy gate protecting the shelter from monsters, and we got into our traveling positions with me, Whil, and Bishop in the cart, and Knox walking beside us, holding Bishop’s hand. Much to my surprise, Cyrus took the job of scouting ahead and looking for trouble in his wolf form, leaving Deacon to push the cart.
I’d have thought Cyrus would have wanted to leave the scouting to his huntmaster and stay with his brothers like he had for most of yesterday, but I wasn’t going to complain. He probably had a lot on his mind, and I was still concerned about how upset he’d gotten when he learned I’d unconsciously formed another mating bond with one of his brothers.
If he wasn’t near me, he couldn’t yell at me and add to the stress I was already drowning under, and I couldn’t accidentally mate bond with him.
Of course, he wasn’t going to stay away forever, and I was going to have to figure out what to do about that.
I turned my attention to Bishop and swept a lock of hair away from his sweaty forehead, refocusing my thoughts on him. His complexion was ghostly and tinged with gray, not a good sign, and the ugly black and red veins covering his body had thickened while we’d been asleep.
My heart thudded hard, the weight of everything crushing inside my chest.
I was going to save him. I’d walk until my feet bled to get to the pool as quickly as possible because he was mine. My mate. He’d always been mine and always would be and I knew, even if he was unconscious, that he wanted to be my mate. He’d told me before we bonded that he loved me and again during our sexy shared dream.
The thought made my heart sing. I wasn’t worried about figuring out our relationship — although we were still going to have to figure a few things out. There wasn’t any resistance with Bishop. Not like there’d been with Knox. The biggest complication was going to be balancing my time between him and Knox, since there were situations where Knox wouldn’t be able to be with us.
Of course, that only mattered if we got Bishop to the pool in time and Whil could magically pull the poison out of him.
“He’s strong,” Whil said as if she could read my thoughts when she was probably just seeing all my fears written on my face. “He’ll make it.”
“He will,” I replied. He had to.
But the nagging voice of fear inside me, the one made stronger with the flood of Knox’s emotions, worried that he wouldn’t make it.
He’d said the shimmer surrounding the dream-grove had been his subconscious holding back the pain, but I’d seen thick black cracks in it just before I’d woken up. That mental protection was going to shatter and then he’d be in agony, even while he was unconscious.
Although maybe that had just been my imagination. I’d just had the most amazing dream sex and felt so connected with him that I’d somehow created a real mating bond between us.
Maybe seeing those cracks was my dream mind showing me a glimpse of my deepest fear because I was unable to truly trust my happiness. People didn’t treat me the way Bishop did. I was weak and pathetic and?—
No.
I lay down and snuggled against Bishop, suddenly needing all the physical contact I could get to strengthen our shifter connection and to push out those horrible thoughts that had been with me all my life.
The thoughts weren’t true. Bishop wasn’t the only one who was kind to me. Knox was kind, but it had taken him a while to get there so he didn’t count. But Eloise and Kira and Zavier and Quinn had been kind from the moment they’d met me. So had Whil, Nova, and Deacon.
There wasn’t something fundamentally wrong with me even though I couldn’t shift. There was something fundamentally wrong with my old pack, especially my old alpha, his son, and their friends.
Everyone else in the pack I might be able to excuse for their lack of kindness and support because they were afraid. But the others had no excuse. They were cruel because they were horrible, heartless people.
I could see that now.
Bishop and the others had shown me time and again that I was more than what Merrick and Sterling had said I was and that there were people out there who we kind and caring even to strangers.
Perhaps other things were a lie, too.
Perhaps I could trust my happiness. Or rather the happiness I’d have once we saved Bishop.
At lunch, we stopped long enough for everyone to eat some rations and for Deacon and Cyrus to switch duties.
Thankfully, I hadn’t been watching when Deacon yanked off his kilt and shifted or when Cyrus shifted into his human form and pulled on his clothes. It was safer if I only ogled my mates. Two was good enough for me. It was two more than I ever expected I’d have.
Cyrus stepped close and grabbed the cart’s handles, his power stuttering in and out of his control, sending shocking zaps rushing through my body and drawing my attention.
Knox grunted, but he wasn’t in any position to complain about his brother’s lack of control. His power was a constant, grating vibration against my skin, and even if I hadn’t been able to sense the turmoil raging inside him, I would have known keeping it contained to a low steady stream was the best he could manage.
“Hey.” I sat up and wrapped my hands around his hand that still clutched tightly to Bishop’s and tried to focus on steadying his soul by pushing strength and love through our bond.
We traveled all day, needing to give Bishop six elixirs to stop his convulsions, which was two more than yesterday, and reached the roadside shelter late in the afternoon.
It had a similar construction to the first one with a heavy iron gate, a wide open area scattered with the stone circles indicating fire pits as well as a rocky overhang protecting half the space. At the back was another squat stone building with a metal door and two windows framed by metal shutters.
Cyrus again pulled the cart under the overhang to protect us from any nighttime rain as Deacon in his wolf form, stepped into the mouth of the sheltered area with a small, deer-like creature in his jaws. It looked like he’d already hunted down our dinner while he’d been scouting ahead.
“Good,” Cyrus said as he locked the cart in position. “That’ll be enough for dinner and breakfast. We can leave the leftovers in the cold cupboard in the shelter for when we come back. I’ll get these guys set up and then meet you outside the shelter to help you butcher it.”
Cyrus strode around to the back of the cart and held out his hands to me.
“Last time I’ll force you to do this,” he said, his voice gruff. “But I’ll expect you to say something if you’re struggling to keep up.”
I slid my butt to the edge of the cart, my eyes flickering to his on their own volition.
His expression was strange. It wasn’t angry or hard like it usually was, but it was tight with tension mixed with something softer, something heartbreaking.
“I will,” I murmured back, that thing in my soul urging me to get closer, to comfort his soul as well. He was just as worried about his brothers as I was… and he was mine.
No. Not mine. Never mine, and I had to pull myself together and stop thinking those kinds of things so I didn’t accidentally trap him in a mating bond.
I gritted my teeth and leaned into his embrace so he could lift me off the cart. One arm hooked under my thighs, the other behind my back, and his powerful deep earthy scent enveloped me. Warmth and certainty blossomed around my heart, sending a surge of panic shooting through me.
Not. Mine.
I squeezed my eyes shut until he set me on the ground. But as soon as I opened them, they instantly jumped back to Cyrus and the hurt in his eyes.
Then his alpha-in-control mask snapped into place, leaving me wondering what the hell had just happened.
Except I didn’t have the mental strength to figure it out right now. Everything within me was focused on sending assurance and calm to Knox while ignoring the sharp flashes of agony coming through my bond with Bishop. Which was something I wasn’t going to outwardly react to because it would make it even harder for Knox to stay in control and Cyrus would question my ability to keep up.
And I was damn well going to keep up.
There were only three or four days left to get to the pool. I’d hiked for a lot longer while fighting my heat. I could do this while fighting the onslaught of overwhelming emotions and a little pain.