Page 7 of Duty and Desire

Chapter Six

Nick

“ H ave I told you how good it is to see you?” Except it was better than good. Claudia seemed to time her visits perfectly, as though she’d known I needed a dose of her.

I was way overdue for my medication.

Claudia raised her glass, and we clinked. “To reunions.” She grinned. “And better weather to enjoy them in.”

I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed her until her message arrived to say she was on the plane from Tahiti.

Claudia’s coming. That had put a bounce in my step, and more light in my day.

I wasn’t unhappy on the island, far from it. I’d chosen to live there after a vacation one summer while I was at university. Claudia and I had been enraptured by the place, and when I’d decided to make a change, it was the first location that had come to mind.

Maybe I’d exaggerated about needing a visit. My life was fine, if a little lonely at times. The work counteracted that, but doing jobs for people only served to bring me into contact with them. As for the island’s inhabitants, I had acquaintances and few friends, and right then I needed a friend.

She smiled. “I figured it was time I checked in with you. And I had a week’s vacation coming to me, so I thought why not spend it here?”

I smirked. “You sound more and more like an American each time I see you. Are you living there permanently now?” After graduation, she’d applied for several jobs in the States. One of the companies had snapped her up in a heartbeat.

Obviously a company with sense. Claudia was intelligent, diligent, and pragmatic, an asset to any enterprise. I was biased, but we’d been friends since I was nineteen, and I’d always known she’d go far.

“I go home every three or four months. Only for short visits, mind you. That’s about all I can stand.” She tilted her head to one side. “Want to hear my news?”

“Only if it has nothing to do with home.” I gestured to our surroundings. “Is this okay?”

I was avoiding the conversation I knew was coming.

“It’s fine.” She glanced toward the rear of the bar, where Kai was busy flirting with a tall guy in long shorts and a button-down shirt.

I didn’t miss the gleam of appreciation in her green eyes.

Claudia inclined her head in his direction.

“Who’s the hunk? And how come you’ve never brought me here before?

Were you hiding him from me? Because he is quite a dish.

” She widened her eyes. “Oh, I get it. You like him. You’ve been keeping him for yourself. ”

I snorted. “Hardly. He isn’t my type.” Kai was good for a laugh when I needed it, however, not to mention a cocktail or two.

She leaned back, her arm resting on the chair next to hers. “ Now I remember. You had a thing for older guys. Wasn’t there a teaching assistant who caught your eye at university? And then there was that professor.” I stiffened, and she flushed. “I’m sorry. That was mean of me.”

“Yes, it was.” I didn’t want to think about my university days .

My home life had cast its shadow over my studies, and although I’d thought myself safely out of sight, I hadn’t reckoned on my father.

He saw everything, even what happened in the hallways of the University of Zurich.

“I’m sorry,” she repeated. “I know it was a long time ago?—”

“Five years,” I interjected.

She nodded. “But it must still hurt, and I should’ve thought about that before I opened my big fat mouth.”

I fired her a warm glance. “It’s a pretty mouth, though. And most of the time what comes out of it is worth listening to, so you’re forgiven.” I took a breath. “Unless it’s something about my family.”

“They must miss you.”

I shrugged. “Fine. Let them miss me. If they want to see me, they know where I am, right?” I gestured to the bar. “Do you see them here? They haven’t once set foot on the island.” I glanced to the right and stiffened. “Then again, they don’t have to, do they?”

She expelled a sigh. “Maybe it’s time for you to go home. Even if it’s just for a short visit. You know, re-establish connections, negotiate a truce…”

I set my jaw. “We’ve had this conversation, remember? No. At least here I can live on my terms. I have freedom.”

She arched her eyebrows and glanced toward the entrance to the bar. “With Franz around? That doesn’t feel like freedom to me.”

I fired Franz a hard stare. “I try not to think about him.” My stomach roiled.

As if he’d let me forget him.

“Have I ever told you how happy it makes me that you let me visit?”

I forced a wry chuckle. “‘Let’ you? You make it sound as if I have a choice. And by the way, same rules as usual. You get the bed, I get the couch. And no arguments.”

“I can afford a hotel, you know.”

“I know,” I countered. “But I also know you hate hotels. At least this way you can keep an eye on me.” Claudia flinched, and I realized how that had sounded.

I grabbed her hands and squeezed them. “I don’t believe for a second that you’re here to spy on me.

You wouldn’t do that.” I sighed. “You’re my best friend.

My only friend, if it comes to that. But I also know you want to be more than that. ”

She blinked. “You make me sound like one of those girls who tries to convince gay guys they’ve just never met the right woman. And sorry to disappoint you, but you are not my type.” Another glance toward Kai. “He’s nearer the mark.” She flushed. “And I wouldn’t kick Franz out of my bed either.”

I laughed. “ Now it all comes out. Does Franz know you have designs on him?”

“They’re not designs,” she remonstrated. “He makes great eye candy, that’s all.”

“That wasn’t what I meant, by the way.” I looked her in the eye.

“You want to be a bridge between my former life and my desire for normalcy.” She fell silent, and I gave her hands another squeeze.

“You know what I love most about you? Your honesty. How you’re never afraid to call me out when I’m being evasive or indecisive.

” I chuckled. “Which is probably most of the time.”

“In that case, let me ask you something.” She grinned. “Any interesting guys on the horizon?”

I laughed. “God, you haven’t changed. I swear you ask the same thing every time you visit.” Maybe it was time I threw her a bone. “And the answer is… maybe?”

Yeah, Gio was a definite maybe.

Claudia blinked. “Seriously?”

I released her hands and held mine up. “Before you get all excited, I’ve met him once, okay?”

“And? Who is he? What’s he like?”

I loved her enthusiasm.

“He’s a writer. He’s staying on the island for a while. He’s…” I conjured up an image of Gio. “He’s American, maybe in his mid-thirties, with brown eyes, and a beard that’s not much more than mine. His hair is cut really short at the sides, and dyed blond on top. ”

I didn’t mention the fact that he was hot. Or that once I’d seen him, it had been difficult to look away. I’d tried not to stare, tried to break eye contact, but I knew my glance had lingered just a beat too long.

Gio seemed to be suffering from the same problem.

“And are you going to make a move on him?” she demanded.

I locked gazes with her. “Do you know what happens every time I get interested in a guy?” I inclined my head toward Franz. “He scares them off.” I didn’t have to turn my head to know he was still there, sipping from a glass of water or soda, trying to make it look as if he wasn’t staring at me.

Except we both knew different.

“Maybe he won’t scare this guy off. He might not be intimidated by your muscle-bound shadow.”

I huffed. “If he isn’t, he’ll be the first.”

Claudia stared out at the lagoon. “It’s beautiful here, but you know this is a short-term escape, don’t you? It can’t last forever.” She glanced at me. “Sooner or later, they’re going to haul you back to reality.”

“And what if I don’t want to go there?”

I knew she was right. There’d come a point when I couldn’t evade my responsibilities any longer, and when that day arrived, I’d have to pack my bags and get on a plane.

But that day hasn’t arrived yet.

So maybe I should enjoy my island life while I could. And see if Gio was easily intimidated.

God, I hoped not. I needed a break, even if it only lasted for a few short weeks.

More than that, I needed a little intimacy.

Are you the man for that, Gio?