Page 31 of Duty and Desire

Gio also needed to know how my life was going to be. I had to show him that he couldn’t be a part of it.

No matter how much I wanted him to be.

“I’ll be fine. And we never did say goodbye properly.”

I could put that right, at least.

Franz shrugged. “As you wish, Your Majesty.” His fingers slid over the screen. A moment later, it buzzed again.

“What does she say?”

“She’ll be here tomorrow. Sorry— they’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Then I’ll inform housekeeping.”

Franz’s eyes gleamed. “You can’t put him in the room next to yours, you know. People would talk. And you don’t need that kind of temptation.”

I stilled. “It’s over, remember? That’s all in the past.”

And by the time Gio left, he’d know that too.

I ignored the ache in my chest, the tightness in my stomach.

This is for the best.

Maybe if I kept telling myself that, I’d believe it eventually.

Franz’s phone buzzed again, and he glanced at it. When his face tightened, I knew what was coming.

I’d been expecting it ever since I’d returned to the palace.

“She’s here, isn’t she?”

I didn’t need to elaborate further.

He pocketed his phone. “Princess Karoline’s car has just pulled into the courtyard.”

The wind picked up, chilling my face.

The thought of what was coming at me chilled my blood .

I stood. “Then I’d better be ready to greet her.”

We walked into the palace, my chest feeling as though it was in a vise. I hadn’t seen Karoline since I left Eisenland for Bora-Bora. She’d attempted to keep in contact, and I’d sent polite replies, nothing that would have encouraged her to visit the island, however.

We’d never been on intimate terms. That was down to me. I’d kept her at arm’s length and had always acted coolly toward her, in the vain hope my father would change his mind if he got the impression we weren’t suited.

I gave an internal snort. If he’d noticed, he’d never said a word.

A seed of hope sprouted in my mind.

What if it isn’t too late?

What if I can make her see that our marriage was my father’s plan, not mine?

What if she loves someone else, and is simply waiting for the opportunity to tell me?

I was clutching at straws, and I knew it.

Karoline stood in the center of the entrance hall, her dark hair braided into an intricate pattern that fell down her back, her dress suit immaculate as always.

Her back was straight, her eyes steady with the cool intelligence I remembered.

Her posture screamed of a queen-to-be, of duty, of expectations.

Of the future I never wanted.

“Your Highness.” The words had a sharp edge to them, as though I was striving to maintain the distance I’d put between us.

Karoline didn’t bat an eyelid, apparently unfazed by my tone. Instead, her lips curved into a polite, practiced smile. There was no warmth in it, but then there never had been, even when she was a teenager. Her gaze raked over me as if she were studying a piece of furniture .

She bowed her head. “Your Majesty.” The formality in her voice cut like ice. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

My stomach roiled.

It’s nothing but words. You never really knew my father.

And yet there she was, playing the part of the dutiful princess, already so perfectly aligned with the role she was meant to fill. I’d always known arranged marriages weren’t uncommon in royal houses, and I’d been forced to accept the situation.

But standing before her, I felt the trap closing in on me, suffocating me, and before I could put a brake on my mouth, I blurted, “You didn’t have to come.”

The words hung in the air between us, awkward and out of place.

Her smile didn’t falter, but now there was an edge to it, something sharp behind the professionalism of her body language.

“Of course I did. I came out of respect, because the situation demands it.” Something flickered briefly in her eyes, something softer, but it was gone before I could name it. “You must be under a lot of pressure right now.”

That’s one way to put it.

I swallowed. “We can’t talk here. Let’s go to my study.” Then I noticed her bags. “I’ll have those sent to your room. Can I inform the housekeeper how long you’ll be staying?” I kept my voice even.

Even before she spoke, her cool smile dashed my hopes that this would be a short visit.

“I’ll stay as long as you need me. For the funeral, of course, and then perhaps we can discuss a date for the wedding. So I may be here for some time.”

I had to try to stop this freight train once and for all.

I led the way to my study, and once I’d closed the door behind us, I went over to my desk and made the call to housekeeping. I gestured to the armchairs, and we sat.

“It’s been a long time, Niko.” Her glance was almost accusing. “Too long. For a while there, I was concerned you’d forgotten about me. ”

I couldn’t calm the frantic buzzing inside me. My ribs felt too tight, and my head ached.

“Don’t you think we should call a halt to all this?”

Karoline’s brows furrowed. “All what? I don’t understand.”

The words spilled out of me in a rush, fueled by frustration, even anger, and a sense of hopelessness.

“You. Me. This marriage. It was my father’s idea, but he’s dead. Why should we continue with this… this royal farce? Can you look me in the eye and tell me this is what you really want?”

The air was still and quiet.

She didn’t flinch. She didn’t recoil. She didn’t even seem surprised. “I’m going to assume this is your grief speaking, Niko.”

Which only served to show she didn’t know me at all.

Her expression softened, just enough for me to see the edge of her patience, the practiced mask of someone who’d been trained to take on whatever mantle life gave them. “What we want doesn’t come into this. This is what we have to do.”

And there it was again, not said aloud but implied. Duty. The same word I’d heard my whole life, used to justify every decision, every expectation, every sacrifice.

Duty was smothering me.

Killing me.

I shook my head. “You have no idea how I feel, do you?” I clenched my hands, my fists so tight my nails dug into my palms. “And do you know why? Because you’ve never had to choose.

You’ve never had to decide who you are, what you are.

This isn’t just about duty.” My chest tightened with something that felt like betrayal, fear shuddering through me.

Fear of losing everything I’d achieved on the island, everything I kept hidden.

I’d already lost Gio. I was about to lose myself.

“I understand more than you think.” Karoline leaned forward, her gaze locked on mine, steady and unflinching. “I know this is not what you want, Niko. But it’s what we have to do.”

She repeated it as though it was the final truth we couldn’t escape.

As though there was no other way.

I wanted to rage at her, to do something, anything but sit there trapped in this hollow, suffocating moment.

But what can I do? My father is dead, and the crown looms. I could already feel its weight upon my head. As for the marriage…

I yearned to give voice to the one thought hammering inside my head.

I can’t marry you. I love someone else.

Except I couldn’t.

Karoline studied me in silence, as if she was trying to read my mind.

Her indulgent smile sent a trickle of unease through me.

“Maybe you’re right. We should wait a while before we have the wedding.

Your subjects are in mourning, after all.

” She reached over and laid her hand on my knee.

“And when the time is right, we’ll get married.

It needn’t be the way your father intended, in the palace chapel.

We’ll choose another way, another location, if that’s what you want.

” Her eyes twinkled. “Just don’t expect me to fly with you to Bora-Bora for a beach wedding.

I think you’ve spent enough time there already.

” She rose. “And now I’ll go to the Great Hall to do my duty. ”

Her words were said with such calm, laced with resignation.

She’s already accepted the role she’s been given.

Maybe that was what angered me the most—how easily she’d accepted it. Marriage. The crown. Me.

I had to face facts.

I’d lost.

I walked with her to the door, and as soon as she was out of sight, I closed it. I leaned forward, my forehead pressed against the smooth wooden surface.

I hadn’t managed to slow the freight train down. I might have bought myself a little more time, but it was still coming, just as relentless.

Then it hit me.

Gio will be here soon .

The only man I’d ever loved. The man I’d have married in a heartbeat, given the chance, was to share the same space as the woman who was going to be my wife, my queen.

And I was going to do my best to keep them apart.