Page 39 of Duty and Desire

Chapter Thirty-Five

Gio

I had never felt so out of place and it probably showed, in my body language and my expressions.

With Claudia’s help, I’d chosen an appropriate suit, so I knew I looked okay, but each time I was introduced to one of the ball’s attendees, they spoke to me in polite tones riddled with condescension, each remark a—sometimes—subtle barb aimed at either my profession or the USA.

“Oh, you’re an American writer? How… refreshing. I do adore the enthusiasm of self-taught literature.”

“And are you a famous writer? I feel the American public is rather obsessed with those who entertain them. It must be exhausting, living for their fleeting approval.”

“It must be so charming to read about our world through the lens of your limited American experience. But you do get some things right, I suppose.”

“Ah, America—the land of the free and the home of… was it cowboys or capitalists? ”

“It’s charming how Americans like to think they can be as sophisticated as Europeans, with all that new wealth and self-made success.”

“I’m sure your history is very different in America, but we Europeans have a far more complex and storied past.”

How I kept a lid on my temper—and a brake on my mouth—I would never know, but through it all I maintained the cool facade of a fixed polite smile and bit my tongue.

I’d stayed away from Nick all evening, and that was torture. Princess Karoline seemed congenial enough from a distance, but I couldn’t help but notice how Nick hadn’t relaxed once in her presence.

When I’d had all the conversation I could stomach, I stood on the periphery, drinking in the chatter, the strains of violins and other instruments from the minstrels’ gallery, the dancers…

Claudia appeared beside me. “Have you two actually been introduced yet?” she murmured before sipping her champagne.

I didn’t have to ask who she meant. “No—have you? Wait a sec, though. You’ve already met.”

She nodded, her eyes locked on Nick. “We exchanged polite greetings, that’s all.

No different from the other occasions where we’ve met.

We never speak long enough for me to form an opinion of her, apart from guessing she’s somehow related to a snake.

” I blinked and she stared back at me. “What? They’re cold-blooded, aren’t they?

And from my limited experience of her, Karoline doesn’t strike me as a particularly warm person.

Which makes me very curious to know what goes on inside that head.

What kind of woman do they want him to marry?

What makes her tick? Does she have opinions of her own? ”

My heartbeat slipped into a higher gear.

I drained my glass. “Let’s find out.” I grabbed another glass from a passing server, and headed in Nick’s direction, the alcohol providing a pleasant buzz.

Daniela spotted me before I’d covered half the distance, and gave me a nod .

How nice to have permission.

When I reached the little group, she gestured to me. “Your Highness, may I introduce Mr. Giovanni Colonna, an American writer who is here to research a book about our country.”

I bowed my head. “Your Highness.” Then I addressed Nick with another nod. “Your Majesty.” I averted my gaze.

Princess Karoline regarded me with polite interest. “Are you enjoying your visit, Mr. Colonna?” She wore a satin gown that matched the pale blue of her eyes, her dark hair coiled, her tiara sparkling in the light from the chandelier.

“I am, Your Highness. It’s intriguing to see another culture, one very different from my own.”

She arched her eyebrows. “May I ask what are the major differences you’ve observed?”

“It’s more a case of what I haven’t observed, Your Highness.”

She blinked. “Indeed. Now you’ve succeeded in intriguing me.” Her tone was polite, yet condescending.

I drank a mouthful of champagne before speaking, conscious of Nick’s attention.

“It’s fascinating to see how different cultures evolve in their understanding of love and identity.

In the U.S., there’s been so much progress with same-sex marriage and LGBTQ rights.

” I looked her in the eye. “Have you observed similar changes in your country?”

Except I already knew the answer to that.

Karoline gave a polite smile. “Ah, yes, I suppose one might call it progress. Though, of course, not all traditions are meant to be discarded simply because the times change.” Another thin smile. “Some values, you see, are rather timeless.”

Nick coughed. “I’d argue that love and equality are among those timeless values.”

She stared at him, momentarily nonplussed, then widened her smile.

“Love is a beautiful thing when it follows its natural course. But then, some… modern interpretations of it do seem rather—how shall I pu t it—contrived. It’s a curious thing, really, how societies can be encouraged to embrace novelty, even at the expense of stability.”

Nick stared at her, his lips parted, his nose crinkling ever so slightly.

Yes, Nick. Listen to what she’s saying. See what lies beneath.

I cleared my throat. “‘Stability’? You mean like the stability of people being free to marry whomever they love?”

Karoline gave a graceful shrug. “Well, in some circles, marriage has always been regarded as more than mere affection between individuals. It has, for centuries, been a foundation of order and legacy. When we redefine such institutions to suit personal whims, we risk unraveling something far greater than ourselves, don’t you agree? ”

Judging by the way Nick’s face tightened a fraction, he was seeing his future wife for the first time. Maybe he’d had no idea of her views.

But he knows now, doesn’t he? And he doesn’t like them.

I wanted to drive the lesson home.

I took another sip before continuing. “I’d say marriage has been redefined many times over the centuries.

I mean, let’s not forget that once upon a time, women had no say in whom they married.

” And neither do certain princes, apparently.

“Interracial couples were once banned. Should we have preserved those ‘timeless’ traditions too?” I gazed at her with a neutral expression.

Karoline laughed. “Oh, my dear Mr. Colonna, we mustn’t conflate historical injustices with matters of, well, natural design.

One cannot undo nature, after all. There is a certain…

complementarity to things, don’t you think?

A symmetry that has guided civilization for millennia.

And yet now, we are expected to applaud when such harmonies are disregarded entirely. ”

I gave an exaggerated blink. “You mean when people are free to love whom they love?”

She let out a sigh. “Ah, love. Such a powerful word, isn’t it? And yet, not everything that calls itself love leads to the betterment of society. I do sometimes wonder if, in our rush to be seen as ever so progressive, we have lost sight of what is truly sacred.”

I glanced at Nick.

You hear her, don’t you? Her words were elegant and non-confrontational, but her condescension, her coded language with her references to natural design , harmony , the betterment of society , and her subtle dismissal of LGBTQ+ relationships as fleeting or unnatural…

All of it rendered her transparent.

Nick took a drink. “Is this where I remind you there were male-male relationships in Greek and Roman times? So maybe such ideas aren’t as progressive as you might think.” His lips twitched. “Your brother was named after one of the most famous gay men in history—Alexander.”

Karoline stared at him. “I trust you’re not implying anything by that remark.”

I couldn’t stand in her presence a moment longer.

“Your Highness, Your Majesty, if you’ll excuse me, I think I need some air.” I bowed once more, then headed for the French doors. A footman opened it for me, and I stepped outside. I followed the path lit by solar lamps, heading for the fountain, and as far as I could get from that ballroom.

I stood by the wall, staring out at the valley below, noting the lights from street lamps and lit windows, the houses nestled in green lush surroundings. I had to wonder if the citizens of Korenz shared Karoline’s attitudes.

If they do, Nick will really have to hide his true nature.

Behind me, I caught the sound of music, the lilting melody of a waltz.

“You are far braver than I am.”

I jumped to hear Nick so close.

I turned to face him. “I had to know. And if she wants to have me thrown out of here on my ear, then so be it. But at least she’s shown you her true colors. ”

He took a step closer. “Dance with me, Gio.” Gone was the stiffness of the last few hours.

This was the Nick I’d known on the island. The Nick I’d only glimpsed now and then since I’d arrived at the palace.

I blinked. “What?”

“We’re alone. We can’t be seen from the palace. And right now I need your arms around me.”

I couldn’t ignore the plea in his voice.

“So you know, I can’t waltz to save my life,” I murmured.

“I can. Just move with me.”

I shifted closer, closing the gap between us, until his scent filled my nostrils, and I could feel the warmth radiating from him. We moved together to the music, a slow, intimate dance, full of all the longing and passion I’d felt for him a lifetime ago on a tropical island.

“You weren’t kidding, were you?” I kept my voice low. “You’re a beautiful mover.” I smiled. “But then you always were, especially in bed.”

“As I recall, you had some amazing moves yourself. You took my breath away.” Nick pressed his lips to my ear. “Dancing with you like this, holding you… it reminds me of why I fell in love with you.” A pause. “And why I’m still in love with you.”

I stopped, my hands on his cool cheeks, his gaze focused on mine. My pulse quickened.

I couldn’t help myself.

I cradled his nape, and our lips met, a soft, yielding kiss that deepened with every passing second. I poured every ounce of love I had for him into that kiss, my heart soaring to hear his low moan, to feel him hold me closer.

“Your Majesty.”

We sprang apart, my heart hammering.

Daniela Risch stood a few feet away from us. Her face could have been carved out of stone.

Nick straightened. “Did you want something, Miss Risch?”

And he thought I was brave ?

Her lips were a hard line. “Your Majesty, I think you may have misled me. Who exactly is this person?”

Nick stared back at her. “You know who he is. Giovanni Colonna, aka G. Meyer, an American author.”

“That was not my meaning. Who is he to you? Because it is now clear to me the pair of you are not strangers as I was led to believe.”

He claimed my hand. “He’s the man I love.”

The way I felt right then, I could have conquered the world.

Nick squared his shoulders. “My cabinet may decree who I marry, but they can’t choose who I fall in love with. And before you say another word, let me assure you that with the exception of a couple of people, no one else knows about this.”

She frowned. “Unfortunately, that’s not true. Not anymore.” She held out a tablet.

Nick took it, and froze.

“What is it?” I demanded. I peered at the screen?—

To see photos of Nick, on the island. A stock photo of me.

And a headline.

King Nikolaus’s Secret Gay Relationship.