Page 21 of Duty and Desire

Chapter Nineteen

Gio

N ick’s hands on my shoulders proved what an excellent sense of timing he had. I bowed my head and groaned as he dug his thumbs into the muscle, kneading, moving them in slow circles.

“That feels so good.”

The kiss he planted on top of my head felt good too.

“Time to stop.” Nick’s breath tickled my ear. “I’ve got the groceries.”

I blinked. “You went out?”

Nick laughed. “And you call yourself a writer? You’re supposed to notice everything.” He pointed to my laptop. “Save what you’ve been working on, and let me feed you.”

I reviewed my last paragraph. “I just have to?—”

Nick tilted my face up toward his, gazing at me with warm eyes. “You’ve hardly moved from this table for three days, except for going to the bathroom. I think you’d bring the laptop to bed if I let you.”

I smiled. “I have better things to do in bed than write.”

The week had flown by, and my life had taken on a new pattern. Whenever he wasn’t working, Nick was there. He cooked, he shopped—and he filled my nights. He slotted into my days as if he were made to be a part of them.

And I was writing again.

Damn, it felt amazing.

Another kiss pressed to my hair. “I won’t ask if I can read it yet, but I would like to at some point.”

I turned my head and cupped his cheek, drawing him lower into a kiss. “Soon,” I murmured against his lips.

He straightened. “And after dinner, you’re going to take a break.” I grinned, and he rolled his eyes. “Not that kind of break. What is that US expression? Horndog? It’s a perfect fit.”

I pulled a face.

Nick snickered. “You would spend all the hours God sends in bed, wouldn’t you?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know about that. The couch works for me too. So does the shower. We haven’t done it on the veranda yet.” I grinned. “A man’s gotta have goals.” I stretched, my arms above my head. “So what kind of break did you have in mind?”

“It’s a surprise, but I guarantee you’ll love it.” He inclined his head toward the dining table. “First, we eat.”

“And there you go again, being all bossy,” I grumbled as I pushed my chair back and headed into the bungalow, aware of Nick’s ass in those shorts, the way it moved…

Okay, so horndog had pretty much nailed it. And as for the bossy part?

I liked it.

“Okay, I’m ready. Are you going to tell me what we’re doing now? ”

Nick took the boat keys from the hook by the door. “Grab a blanket and some pillows. We’ll need them.”

I blinked. “Color me intrigued. Where exactly are we going at this hour of the night?”

He smiled. “Wait and see.”

By the time I’d emerged from the bedroom, my arms full, he was standing on the veranda, holding a flashlight. I followed him to the jetty, where he climbed into the boat, holding out his hands for our supplies. Then he helped me aboard.

I sat beside him as he switched on the engine. “Curiosity is killing me.”

“You’ll survive. You’re not a cat.” He drove out into the lagoon, the lights on the boat’s bow showing the way. The sky was black, the waters calm. When we’d gone out a far way, Nick dropped the anchor—and switched off the lights.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re going to look at the stars. Let your eyes become accustomed to the dark.”

Stargazing? From a boat?

Then I took in my surroundings, and whatever words I’d been about to utter died in my throat. The lagoon was so calm, it was like a mirror, and I couldn’t make out the horizon.

It was as if I were floating in space.

Nick spread out the blanket in the cockpit, then arranged the pillows before lying down. He stretched out his hand to me.

“Come here.”

I joined him, my head resting on the pillow. I looked up into the night sky, and two things were made clear to me.

I was insignificant, nothing more than a speck in the universe.

The only word to describe the star-strewn canopy above our heads was majestic.

Nick pointed up. “There’s the Milky Way. I love seeing it on nights like this, when it looks like a river of stars stretching out across the sky. Bora-Bora is great for stargazing. The light pollution is minimal, and there’s so little development on the island, it keeps the skies dark.”

“Why do I feel as though I’m gazing into the very heart of the universe?” I murmured.

“Spoken like a writer. What constellations do you recognize?”

“We can see Orion from the US.” I pointed to a collection of stars. “Is that the Southern Cross?” I’d never seen it, except in photos.

“It is. And you see that bright star there, southeast of Orion? That’s Sirius, part of the constellation of Canis Major, the Greater Dog. Did you know, there are forty-two constellations that represent an animal?”

I held out my arm, and Nick snuggled up to me. “How come you know so much about Astronomy? Did you study it in college?”

“It was something I was always interested in. Where I lived, there was little light pollution too. The stars were so abundant, they were like shiny dust.” He chuckled.

“What’s so funny?”

“I was recalling something from university. One summer, Claudia and I went on a nighttime stargazing trip with some other students. We didn’t go far, just to a city park.

A few of them had never seen the sky through a telescope before, and one of them got really excited about it.

But that’s not the funny part. There was one guy who was looking at the moon.

He spent several minutes staring into the eyepiece.

Then he turned to us and remarked that it was a lot smaller than he’d expected.

” Nick grinned. “You should have seen his face when I told him he was looking at Jupiter.”

I laughed. “Seriously?”

“Absolutely true.”

I snickered. “My kid brother swore he saw a shooting star once. Turned out it was a firefly.”

We lay there in the dark, while Nick pointed out Pegasus, Scorpius, and Centaurus. I smiled at that last one. “Is that where Alpha Centauri is?”

“I’m impressed. ”

I coughed. “I watched a lot of Star Trek when I was a kid.”

“Can I ask you a personal question?”

I pulled him closer. “You can ask me anything you want. Sharing my bed brings special privileges,” I quipped.

“You’re a good-looking man, you’re intelligent, funny… How come you’re single?”

My heartbeat quickened a little.

“Forget I asked. It’s none of my business.”

I sighed. “No, it’s okay. It’s just not something I talk about.” It was a strange moment, lying in a boat, the starry heavens above us, feeling his body so warm against mine…

Then it hit me. Nick wasn’t going anywhere, and I had nothing to hide anymore.

“To be honest, I’ve never felt ‘at home’ in the dating scene. Throughout my twenties and early thirties, I was always more focused on my career than my personal life. I kept telling myself I just wasn’t ready for a relationship.”

Nick said nothing, but laid his head on my chest, his arm around me.

“Which brings us to the present. I’m thirty-seven, and I’m starting to feel as though I’ve missed out.

Not on sex—hook-ups weren’t a problem—but on the opportunity to build something real with someone.

” I expelled another sigh. “I wasn’t only a burned-out writer.

I’d also been burned by… I suppose you’d call them shallow connections that never amounted to anything.

” I huffed. “It got so the idea of putting myself out there again felt so… daunting.”

Nick stirred, his lips soft on my cheek.

“I’ve always been a perfectionist. Once upon a time, that perfectionism fueled my creative side.” I tightened my arm around him. “It also made me hesitant to let anyone in, emotionally.”

“But why?”

I laid my soul bare. “I guess I was scared that any relationship would eventually crumble under the weight of my own insecurities. ”

Nick moved, and suddenly I was pinned beneath his weight, his head blotting out my view of the stars. “And now?”

I stroked his cheek. “Do you know what you are?”

“That’s an odd question.” He pressed his lips to my palm, and kissed it.

“You, Nick—” I stilled. “I don’t even know your surname.”

“That’s because I haven’t shared it.” There was a moment’s hesitation. “And it’s Wenzel.”

I kissed him in the dark, a leisurely lingering kiss. I held his face between my hands. “You, Nick Wenzel, are my muse.”

I could feel him smiling. “Really?”

“Without a doubt.”

My words flowed again. Nick had managed to re-ignite a spark within me, and the flame of creativity burned once more, brighter than ever. And lying there with him, the universe stretched out over our heads, I allowed myself to hope something for the first time since we’d met.

Let this be more than a vacation romance.