Page 122 of Brainwashed

I totally started it. Fuck.

Heat is spreading up my neck into my face while I listen to this. It’s not like me to feel shame or humiliation. It so rare, but right now I’m fucking flushed.

The sounds are sort of shuffling, but when I close my eyes, I can see it. Felix Darcey dropping onto his knees and opening my pants.My balls hum and I slowly lie back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling while I listen to us breathing. And him sucking. And me groaning.

Jesus fucking Christ… what is this??

My hand slides down to my crotch and I adjust my growing erection.

This makesno sense. I’m not interested in men. I’m not sexually attracted to The Carver.I can’t be.

But my dick is throbbing as I listen to him getting me off with his warm, wet mouth, and to be honest, I think it was far less than five minutes. Probably more like three. He’s just…fuck, so good at it.His tongue, and the way he sucks deep into the back of his throat.I mean, God, my dick ain’t short and he almost had my balls on his chin.

Talented fucking mouth.

Precum pulses out of my cock inside my pants and I growl out of frustration, tossing the phone away from me. I need to figure this out… I need a solution to this madness.

After all, I’m a doctor. I value science,researchabove all else.

I need to perform an experiment.

Jumping up, I mind my achy balls and jaunt across the room, grabbing my laptop. Opening a web browser, I pull up a popular porn website. I don’t watch it often, but when I do, I have my defaults.Girl on girl, anal, maybe some light BDSM if I’m feeling it.

But there’s the side of the site I never go to, and that’s the one I’m clicking on right now.

Gay porn.

It feels bizarre even looking at this. There’s a lot of uncomfortable shifting happening in my gut right now, but I also feel like my erection is dying while I scroll through all the videos.I don’t think I want this…

Still, I find a video and press play. It’s pretty basic. Two white guys, one with tattoos, both pretty jacked. They’re making out, and I watch, sort of bored. Then they start sucking each other’s dicks.

Nothing. My own is pretty much back to flaccid.

One guy gets on his stomach while the other one stuffs his face between his ass cheeks. I let out an annoyed huff.

But then Felix’s voice pops into my head… When he was telling me about his seventeenth victim.

“He ate my ass for like a half-hour.”

My dick perks up. I watch the video of the guys touching each other, licking and sucking. And suddenly, all I can see is Felix doing it. I swallow over a lump in my throat, my hand falling down to rub my growing erection over my pants while the guy on the screen grabs the hips of the other guy and flips him over.

He settles between his legs, and I close my eyes.

This is what Felix did. Before he killed them.

Opening my pants slowly, I stuff my hand inside and pull out my dick. I rub it gently, imagining Felix’s hand around the man’s throat. He pumps his dick inside the man, tightening his grip. He takes a knife and slices the man’s flesh…

My cock pulses precum on my hand and I let out an unsteady breath. When I peek at the screen, I find one guy holding the other down, pounding into him. My eyelids flutter and I see my own hands holding down the pale skin beneath me. The curves of pectoral muscle.

I imagine silky chestnut hair, pouty pink lips and stormy gray eyes hidden behind black-framed glasses.

“Fuck me, Doctor…”

I squeeze my hand tight around my erection while I stroke, imagining how tight he would be…

“This is so stupid…” I whisper to myself. “I’m not gay.” My hand moves faster while I picture his face. His eyes rolling back. “I don’t want you.”

He cries while I grip his throat, and his dick erupts, spraying cum up to where my hands are. I swirl my fingers in it and stuff them into his mouth.