Page 118 of Brainwashed

Templeton lets out a subtle scoff, and I glare at him.

Johansson’s forehead lines. “But I thought you wanted to be involved…”

“Not this time,” I bark.

The three of them share a brief look before conceding and wordlessly shuffling out of the office. I roll my eyes, slowly standing up from my seat to follow after them. We take the halls like a troop ofprofessionals, although right now I don’t feel like any of us are quite that.

I suppose it doesn’t matter, though.

At the end of the corridor, my pace slows as I watch the three of them file into the examination room. I creep up to the doorway, peering inside the window. He’s already in there.

The orderly is shackling a shirtless Felix to the chair. I feel my breathing pick up just a bit, and it’s disturbing. This is why I didn’t want to be involved in this today.

I need a break. Never mind the fact that I just watched Manuel Blanco slit a man’s throat based on somethingIdid… He brought us all into a room as a show of power, to remind everyone who we’re dealing with.

Really, I wish I could feel bad about it. But call me self-centered. After what happened yesterday, I had my mind stuck on someone other than an unfortunate control room guard who probably didn’t deserve to die.

And I had no intention of even seeing him today.

I mean, really though… What is wrong with me??

My jaw tightens as I push away all the jumbled memories and focus onwork. Templeton is securing the usual electrodes to Felix’s temples, then placing them on his bare chest. I can still see the marks on him from their last experiment. They’re faded… I don’t think they’ll scar. But still.

The strangest feelings of anger and protection filled me when he showed me those marks the other night. It makes no sense.What are these reactions I keep having to him?

It’s like he’s weaseled his way inside my head, which is ridiculous, sinceI’mthe one studyinghim. I’m the one in charge, reigning over the psychopath. He’s not supposed to get to me.

He’s not supposed to make me—

Let’s not go there.

Felix is strapped to the exam chair by every fastening; his ankles, wrists, and neck. He can barely move, and while he looks exhausted, as if he’s getting used to being strapped up and tested this way, he still manages to struggle against the restraints.

He hasn’t spotted me yet, which is good. I’m just barely peering through the window, trying to keep myself hidden. I really don’t want him to see me. If our eyes lock, then I’ll be forced to remember what it looked like when he was on his knees in front of me, and I just can’t think about that right now. I’ve never been one for denial, but I think in this case it will be my best bet.

Ignore it and it’ll go away.

After all, it was just a blowjob. I’ve gotten them from women I’ve known for shorter amounts of time than I’ve known Felix.

But still… they werewomen.

And Felix is a man.

So… We’re ignoring.

“What is this??” Felix’s unsteady voice pulls me back to the present.

They’ve put a blindfold on him, and he’s becoming visibly agitated. I know it’s because he can’t see. Felix hates not being able to see.

A strange uneasy feeling settles in my gut while I watch him lying helplessly strapped to the chair, awaiting whatever they’re planning this time.

Dr. Johansson introduces himself to the cameras, speaking the date and time, followed by Felix’s vitals. The hidden cameras roll twenty-four-seven in the exam rooms, with a live feed that goes directly to us doctors and the Warden, should he choose to watch it. It also records footage for playback.

No privacy in here.

“Today we are injecting the patient with sodium pentothal,” Johansson says, then nods at Templeton, who cleans Felix’s arm.

Sodium pentothal, otherwise known as the truth serum.