Page 122 of As the Years Pass

“I want you to come with me, I’m just… I don’t know.”

He nods, as if he understands. Maybe he does.

“Is this too much for you?” he asks.

“That depends on the outcome, Adam.”

“The outcome is us together,” he says firmly.

My eyes fall closed and I try not to think too much on that. When I open my eyes, he’s still staring at me.

“Then why do we need to wait to get home to talk about that?” I ask, searching his eyes.

“I guess we don’t.”

“You guess?”

“Is anything I say going to be right?” he asks, pushing on my side for me to get off him. He walks naked to the bathroom, and I can’t help but stare at his ass as he goes. The shower turns on, and I know we’re going to be late meeting Dominic and Mikah,but that’s just too bad. I go to the bathroom, grateful when I find the door unlocked.

I pull back the shower curtain, startling Adam. We stare at each other for a moment before he sighs and says, “Get in here.” So I do. We wash up then dry off and get dressed. Before we leave, Adam grabs my arm. “I don’t want to wait.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“I’m sure. Fuck, I am so sure. Nothing in this world feels as good as you do, Emmet. I want this with you, I swear I fucking do. And I am so sorry that I made you think anything different.” He steps up to me, putting his arms around me. “I love you, I love us together, I love the way you make me feel, and I don’t want to be with anyone but you.”

“But…”

“We just have some things to talk about, that’s all.”

“What kinds of things?”

“I don’t know, I just feel like we need to figure things out.”

“That’s normal, Adam. That’s what you do in a relationship. You figure things out together. You don’t need to make it seem like it’s a problem or roadblock.”

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I guess I just don’t know how to do this, but I want to do it with you. I promise you. Iwantthis.”

“Are—”

His phone rings and he sighs as he pulls it from his pocket, but then his face lights up. He answers the call, holding it out in front of him which tells me it’s a video call.

“Hey, kiddos,” he says with a smile.

“Hi, Daddy!” Judy and Ian shout together. “Are you having fun? We miss you.”

“I miss you too. And yes, I am having so much fun.”

“What are you doing?” Judy asks.

“Right now, I’m going to eat brunch with some friends.”

“The ones who got married?” Judy asks.

“Yes, and Emmet.” He looks at me, and I can’t help but smile. I missed his kids.

“Emmet is there? Tell him I said hi!”

Adam turns the phone. “You can tell him yourself.”