Page 75

ALEXEI
Stef comes back just after Mischa leaves and I’m making a cup of coffee.
“Hey, you want one?”
He looks deflated as he closes the door and I wanna ask what’s wrong, but something stops me.
“No thanks, I had like two espresso’s with Alice.”
“I would tell you to go and get some sleep, but you probably won’t be able to.” I stop what I’m doing and turn around, giving him my full attention. “Hey Stef, I’m really grateful for what you did for me last night. Giving up your sleep like that.”
He gives me one of his Bambi-caught-in-the-headlights looks and my stomach swoops. “Don’t worry, I’ve done worse to cram for a music exam.”
“Why do you always do that?”
“What?”
“Play down what you do for people. How nice you are?”
He blushes.
I feel my own face start to heat up and turn away. “You don’t need to anyway, that’s all I’m saying.”
I finish making my coffee and by the time I turn around, he’s heading for his room.
“I think I will go and lie down for a bit, even if I can’t sleep.”
“Okay, I’ll keep it down out here.”
He turns around with his hand on the doorknob.
“Alexei?”
“Yeah?”
“You know you can talk to me about anything right? Any time, day or night. You know you’re not alone and you don’t have to pretend to be someone else with me?”
I just stare at him, blinking, becausefuck, what am I supposed to say to that? He waits for an answer, so I nod.
Stef must be asleep,because I don’t hear a peep out of his room for hours. I should probably wake him up soon or his schedule will be all fucked up for days. I’ll watch some house flipping shows with him – that is if he doesn’t start playing nurse again and ban me from watching TV.
I check my emails to see if I have any news back from the internships I applied for, but there’s nothing. I tell myself it doesn’t mean anything. I’ll get something. I have to.
Then I check Bookgeeks, seeing a message from horror boy.Fuck, when was the last time I checked back here? I’ve been so distracted with everything going on with hockey, and school, and Stef, I’ve neglected horror boy when he’s been so good to me.
There are two messages. The top one says:
RedRum237: I have a bit of a problem, I’m wondering if you could give me some advice. I know you don’t want us to meet, and that’s fine, I’ve come to terms with it, so I hope I’m not out of line by telling you this.
I’ve been building up a new friendship with this guy, and something happened between us, and now I think the friendship might be ruined, and I really don’t want it to be.
What should I do?
Fuck.He met someone. Obviously he met someone. I have no right to be pissed at him. But also. I don’t think I am pissed. Like, at all.
There’s a newer message underneath. It says he sent it about a minute ago. I read that one, my heart sinking a little, but much less than it would have a few months ago.
RedRum:237: Hey,