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“Oh Steffy.” Alice puts her arm around me and gives me a good squeeze.
“I’ll be okay. We have this big performance in the city in a few weeks and then there aren’t any more big ones, and then we graduate. I’ll figure it all out then.”
“Maybe you should talk to someone in the meantime to help you get through it, like a counsellor or something?”
I shake my head. “I don’t want Professor Lisette to find out.”
“She wouldn’t have to. It would be confidential.”
Everything in me seizes up at the thought of talking about all of this to a stranger. “I don’t know.”
“Just promise me you’ll think about it okay?”
Alice looks so concerned. I hate that I’m making her feel this way. “Okay.” I say, watching her shoulders sag with relief. “I promise.”
She comes backto the apartment with me. Alexei isn’t home so we make frozen margaritas in his blender and order beef short rib soup and Korean pancakes and put face masks on before putting a movie on the TV.
“I think I’d still marry Corey Taylor.” Alice says between sips of margarita.
“The guy in the scary mask?”
She rolls her eyes. “Obviously not in the mask. What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Who are you gonna marry?”
Alexei’s face flashes to the forefront and I quickly push it out. Obviously I’m not gonna marry him.
“I don’t know.”
“You know who’s cute, the guy from that band…”
The sound of Alexei putting his key in the door makes my heart feel like it physically stopped beating.
Alice turns with a big grin on her face as he steps inside and jumps the second he sees us.
“What?” Alice asks. “Oh, the face masks. Hey, you want one?”
“Um. I’m good. Thanks though.”
She tucks her feet under her while I try to arrange myself into a more attractive, natural-looking pose. It isn’t easy when it probably looks like I spread meringue all over my face. Alexei isn’t looking at us as he goes into the kitchen.
“We ordered food, probably way too much, if you’re hungry.” Alice shouts to him.
“What are you guys making in my blender?”
Alice makes a face at me, likeoops, busted.
“Margaritas, you want one?”
How can she be so casual with him? I’m so on edge right now. I know he’s not gonna go ape shit, or at least, I don’t think he is. But I just really don’t want him to be mad at me. Especially not after what happened last night.
Someone rings the doorbell and Alice jumps up to get it.
“That must be the food, you having some Alexei?”
He looks at me and I drop my eyes. “No, thanks, I’m just gonna go study in my room.”