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Kelsier38: You’re right. I want that too.
RedRum237: So, shall we meet?
Kelsier38: Yes
RedRum237: When?
Kelsier38: How about this weekend?
RedRum237: Really? You’re not April Fooling me?
Kelsier38: No, I wouldn’t do that.
RedRum237: Where?
Kelsier38: You choose
RedRum237: You’re from Brooklyn and I’m from Queens, so we should meet somewhere neutral
Kelsier38: This isn’t West Side Story horror boy, I won’t bring my knife, but make sure you wear red, because they’re my gang colors.
RedRum237: Shut up Have you heard of Katz’s deli? It’s on the Lower East Side. I’ll bring a Brandon Sanderson book so you’ll recognize me. Or should I bring something a bit more obscure? Isn’t Sanderson a pretty popular author these days?
Kelsier38: It’s the Lower East Side, horror boy, don’t sweat it. Everyone’ll be reading Kafka and Sally Rooney.
RedRum237: okay, Sanderson it is then. Shall we say 2pm this Saturday? Katz’s on the Lower East Side?
Kelsier38: It’s a date
6thApril
RedRum237: What happened? I waited for you at that diner for over an hour. I was so embarrassed when you didn’t show. The waitress obviously felt bad about kicking me out, but someone else needed the table and I got kicked out of there like a loser who just got stood up on a blind date.
Did you walk in, take one look at me and bail? It’s okay, you can be honest. I’d rather know. At least then I’ll know I’m wasting my time even wondering why you might have changed your mind and stop wasting another second thinking about you and what I did wrong.
7thApril
Kelsier38: Fuck, horror boy. I’m sorry.
Of course I didn’t walk in, see you and leave. I didn’t even make it off the train. I was on the subway, freaking out about finally meeting you. Thinking about how much I’ve shared with you and feeling vulnerable as fuck. And I lost my nerve and got off the train at some random stop.
I went home, pulled my blanket over my head and told my roommate I was sick. I couldn’t face even looking at my messages.
I know I’ve blown it. You’ll probably never wanna speak to me again, and I get it. I don’t deserve you. I’m a piece of shit. You deserve someone who will be there IRL and treat you like the scary little prince you are.
I’m sorry. I don’t expect your forgiveness. I just needed to tell you that you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re perfect. I’m the fuck up.
RedRum237: Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t ready? I read back through our messages where we agreed to meet, and maybe I pushed you too much? I should have seen you weren’t ready, and I’m sorry I made you feel like you had no choice. Can we please just go back to talking on here? I don’t want to lose this.
Keslier38: I don’t deserve you horror boy. Seriously, you deserve better.
I don’t wanna lose you either, but I won’t stand in the way of you having your happy ever after IRL. So yes, please keep talking to me on here. But don’t let it stand in the way of you dating real men. And if you get a boyfriend, we’ll go back to being platonic. No more sexting. I’ll respect whatever relationship you get into. Does that sound cool?
RedRum237: So that’s it between us?
Kelsier38: I didn’t say that. I just said, what if we keep talking on here, and if you get a real boyfriend, I’ll respect your relationship and we’ll go back to being platonic and talking about books. What do you think?
RedRum237: I think that sounds better than never speaking to you again