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“Of course it is. I’d never tell anyone about Aqua.”

Elena giggled. “Are you making fun of me?”

“Would I do that to my friend?” Cat grinned as Elena eyed her for a moment.

“I mentioned to you that my sex life with Dean wasn’t the greatest,” Elena began.

Cat nodded then put her arm on the back of the couch and turned towards Elena. Her knee rested against the outside of Elena’s thigh. The simple touch brought her a feeling she couldn’t quite name and that was okay. There were several things about Elena that Cat avoided thinking about because if she did they might overstep the boundary of friendship.

Elena looked over into Cat’s eyes. “Please don’t think I’m complaining or was unhappy in any way. Dean was wonderful and I loved him very much and I knew without a doubt that he loved me.”

Cat gave her an encouraging smile.

“I’ve never talked about sex with anyone and I don’t know why I want to talk about it with you. But…” Elena took a deep breath and rested her fingers on Cat’s knee.

“For something that makes you feel so good, it can be hard to talk about,” Cat said softly.

“That’s just it. I loved the intimacy Dean and I shared when we held each other, but sex rarely made me feel good. There was always this desire of wanting to feel the way people feel in the books we read, but we just couldn’t get there.”

Cat put her hand over Elena’s and asked, “Did you ever have an orgasm?”

Elena looked up. “If I ever had one with Dean, it was a long time ago.”

Cat nodded. “I’ve faked an orgasm or two in my life.”

Elena’s eyes widened. “Haven’t we all?”

Cat chuckled and Elena felt the tension ease in the room.

“But let me tell you something, Cat Sloan. That little vibrator has given me more orgasms in the last few weeks than the rest of my life combined.”

Cat could see the twinkle in Elena’s eyes. “Good for you.”

“I don’t feel guilty about it either.”

“You shouldn't.”

“It seems a little bizarre for a forty-seven-year-old woman who was married for nearly twenty-five years to all of a sudden be this interested in sex.”

“But is it just the sex?”

Elena smiled. “No. You told me I might discover things about myself and it was a good thing.”

Cat smiled.

“One thing I have discovered is that I will not settle for a ho-hum sex life with my next partner,” Elena stated.

“Okay! Now, are we looking for a man or a woman?” Cat asked.

“We’re not looking,” Elena said. “At least not right now. There is more to me than sex.”

9

“Well, duh! Of course there is,” Cat said, squeezing Elena’s fingers.

“I think what I’m discovering is that all the parts of me need to be nurtured, not just some of them.”

“Go on,” Cat encouraged her.