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Tonight, two extra men guarded the front gate, though one of them was smoking a Cuban cigar, its bright red a beacon in the dark night.
I’d heard rumors that some of Abuelo’s old enemies from Veracruz, Mexico, were trying to hedge into his territory. They had a long history, filled first with poverty, then with riches, and finally betrayal. I didn’t know the real story, only rumors whispered in the streets, but I did know that tensions were high, and El Abuelo wasn't taking chances.
Since the men were new, I wasn't sure if they would know me, so I snuck around to the back. I took off my shoes, easily climbing over the fence using the large wooden crate Knight had drug up to the fence years ago for me. As soon as I landed onto the soft grass, I kept to the shadows until I reached the large, columned porch. It was an easy climb from there up to Knight’s window, and I slipped inside.
His room was dark, the tile under my feet cold but clean. I turned on the light, finding his large, king sized bed unmade, with several pillows thrown onto the floor. In his closet, two large suitcases were on the floor, clothing spilling out of them. By the pile of dirty clothes next to them, he’d been here for days.
So, it was true.Of course it was true,the slithering voice in my mind hissed. He’d arrived and hadn't come to see me.And why would he?
My stomach cramped, nerves clenching, disappointment coiling.He doesn’t want you. You’re nothing to him.My throat was suddenly full and I wanted to run. To run away from the bright, golden room, filled withstuff, his stuff, and into the star filled night, never to return.
But, I had to speak to him; I had no choice.
I steeled myself and walked out of his room, quietly making my way down the stairs, where the lights and loud noise told me he would be.
I heard his laughter first, and somehow, it made everything inside me loosen. The man was annoyingly charming. Luck clung to him like a jealous lover and I knew that once he knew of my situation, he would make things right.
He always did.
I smiled to myself as I made my way down the stairs, anxious to see him. I was certain now, that my anxiousness that he didn't want to see me was childish. I could've just as easily come to see him. Why was I always expecting him to come to me?
I’d been proud of the fact that I was the only girl who made Knight come to her, instead of the other way around. But I couldn't expect that to last forever, could I? It was time for me to grow up.
My feet hit the tiled floor and I strode towards the brightly lit main room, a lightness to my step with the confidence that Knight would fix everything.
As soon as I saw him, my smile fell away at the sight before me, and the strangling voice at the back of my mind surged forward.See? It’s true. You’re nothing. Worthless and insignificant.
The room was brightly lit, luxuriously decorated, and filled with the laughter of men who knew they owned the world. My eyes had instantly found him, sitting in the middle of the room. A table had been set up between three elegant, golden sofas, and Knight was sitting across from Abuelo and other important mafioso men that surrounded them.
My Papa would burn with jealousy to be in the presence of such men, but Knight leaned back, confident in the knowledge that he belonged among them.
What made my stomach burn though, was the woman sitting in his lap.
See? He doesn’t care about you. You’re just a child.
It was Valentina Marsala, and her arms were wrapped casually around his neck, her eyes dancing with confidence and humor. She was perfectly made up, with a black dress that dipped low, showing off her generous cleavage, and her lips were painted with the perfect shade of red.
I suddenly felt out of place.
I had nothing on this woman, and the lip gloss I'd put on with such care earlier, now seemed so childish.
No wonder Knight hadn't come to see me. He hadwomenat his beck and call. And even though he was only fourteen, he seemed more man than child, and they treated him as such.
My heart hammered in my chest and my stomach twisted in knots. Just like my parents, I didn't belong here.
I turned to run from the room, grateful that Knight’s back was to me and he hadn't seen me enter the room, when I was suddenly noticed.
"Tatiana!" El Abuelo's loud, welcoming voice boomed through the room, and all the voices in the room stilled. I turned around, knowing I had to show the proper respect to the Don of the island. “Hellohija.”
Child. I was still a child in these men’s eyes.
My throat was suddenly full; everyone had turned and was looking at me.
I forced a smile. "Hello, Abuelo.”
Abuelo was the kind of man that people loved and respected. He even sat at the head of the room now like a well-loved king, with everyone surrounding him. He was kind and generous but, if you disobeyed him, he could slice off your head with a word.
And his sword was sitting next to him.