Page 213 of The Queen’s Shadow

“Oh, I’m still burning that outfit.” He smirked at me, dropping a kiss on my forehead before getting out of bed.

“Hey! I like that top.” I protested. “Can’t we just wash it?”

“Nope,” he smirked before disappearing down the hall. He reappeared a moment later with one of his t-shirts in hand, which he tossed to me. “In fact, I would prefer if you wore this for the rest of the day, just to be safe.” He gave me a dark look. “When the rest of them arrive, I don’t want there to be any more incidents. I almost killed Aiden when I found him on top of you.”

“Fine. But just for tonight.” I agreed, pulling his shirt over my head. He gave me a satisfied grin and kissed my head again appreciatively.

“Good girl.” He said, tapping me on the nose before heading out the door.

After putting on a fresh pair of pants and heading out after him, I couldn’t help but notice the outfit I had been wearing was nowhere to be seen.

Possessive asshole.

I tried to be angry about it but found that I wasn’t. The way Aiden’s scent on me had driven him wild stirred something within me, a feeling I couldn’t quite pinpoint. I wasn’t sure how I felt about it, but whatever it was, it wasn’t a bad feeling.

I slipped into the bathroom and looked at the purple hickey he had left on my neck. I fingered it gingerly and frowned.

Why had I asked him to do this to me? I suddenly felt self-conscious. Doubt crashed through my mind, and I wondered if I had made a mistake. Was it fucked up that I had liked it when he had held me down and left bite marks all over me? What did that say about me as a person?

A spike of anxiety shot through my heart and was followed by a heavy roll of guilt. Was something wrong with me?

As if he could sense the internal war that had erupted inside my head, Rycon appeared behind me, a deep frown on his face.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, slipping his hands around my waist, and pulling me into him. He buried his nose in the crook of my neck, gently kissing the mark he had left on my throat. “Are you okay?” He asked softly, meeting my gaze through the mirror.

“I… I don’t know.”

“What’s going on up here?” He tapped the side of my head gently. “You smell… ashamed.” He turned me around in his arms, so I was facing him. “Why?”

I bit my lip, unsure if I wanted to tell him the truth, but I knew he would smell it if I lied.

“You can tell me, Kasha. I won’t judge you.” He promised, rubbing his thumb gently over my bottom lip, pulling it out from between my teeth.

“I… I think there’s something wrong with me.” I whispered, and his frown deepened.

“Why would you think that?” He asked, looking at me so intensely, I felt my face burn beneath his scrutiny. I tried to look away, but he turned my head back to face him. “Look at me. Tell me why you think something’s wrong with you.” His tone was soft but demanding.

“I just… why did I want you to do that to me? I must be sick in the head. It makes me feel like maybe I… I don’t know. Did I ask for it when I… when they…” My eyes welled with tears as I suddenly felt like I deserved what had happened to me.

“Hey,” he whispered, wiping away the rogue tear on my cheek with his thumb and leaning down so we were eye level.

“There’s nothing wrong with you for wanting to explore a new experience with someone you trust, Kasha. What we just did is not the same thing as what was done to you.”

“But… I liked it when you bit me.” I confided. Why did I like it when he did it, but had nightmares about similar things happening when I had been trapped by my tormentors? He gave me a small smile and kiss on the nose.

“I’m glad to hear that you liked it, because I plan on doing it again, hopefully soon.” He brushed his thumb over my cheek once more, his eyes searching mine intently. “But only if you want me to, Kasha. That’s the difference, here. Wanting me to bite you does not mean you wanted them to bite you, or to do anything else they might have done to you without your consent. None of that was your fault.”

“It just feels… strange. That I would want that. Especially after what happened to me.” I whispered, still unsure if I was convinced that I wasn’t a complete freak for enjoying the way he had held me down and marked my flesh.

“It’s very common for victims of sexual assault to have darker kinks, Kasha.”

This came as a shock to me; I raised my eyebrows at him in surprise.

“It is?”

He nodded. “Yes. You’re not strange, damaged, or messed up because you liked what we did in there. I’m sure, given time, and if you let me, I can help you uncover some even crazier kinks you might enjoy.” He smirked at me, giving me a mischievous wink.

I pursed my lips, frowning.