Page 127 of The Queen’s Shadow

“I paid to be here!” He shouted, trying to shove me off of him. Taking my foot off his chest, I slid my shadowstone dagger out of its sheath on my ankle. Without hesitation, I plunged it into his gut and dragged it across his stomach, relishing in the blood and gore that immediately spilled in the wake of my blade. I dropped the knife on the ground once I was satisfied with the depth of the wound.

“What the FUCK!” He shouted attempting to sit up before I slammed my foot back into him, pressing him into the floor. I straddled him, reaching behind me and diving my hand into his wound. I curled my fingers around his intestines until he let out a sharp scream of pain.

“Please, stop!” He coughed up another mouthful of blood and I sneered at him as he choked.

“Is that what she said, when you put your filthy hands on her?” I asked, putting the muzzle of my gun to his lips with the hand that wasn’t buried in viscera.

His eyes rolled back into his head, and he whimpered. He was going into shock. I didn’t have much more time with him before he died. I growled in irritation at how weak he was.

He hadn’t suffered enough.

I pulled my hand out of his wound and pushed the barrel of the gun into his mouth, squeezing his cheeks and forcing his mouth open with my bloody fingers. He crushed his eyes closed and I noticed that tears had started to well behind his lids. I felt a swell of satisfaction rush through my chest.

“Look at me.” I ordered, and he shook his head as best he could with the barrel of my gun in his mouth.

“I said, look at me.” I slapped him roughly on the side of the face and his eyes shot open. The second his eyes met mine, I hissed.

“Suck on it.”

He tried to shake his head again and I pressed the gun deeper into his mouth. My heart was pounding so hard I could hear my own blood roaring in my ears. “Suck. On. It.” I repeated, and he closed his eyes again, before doing as he was told. I watched as his cheeks hollowed out while he sucked on the barrel of my gun.

“Are you afraid?” I asked him, and he whimpered, the sound muffled against the metal of the Glock. “Do you think she was afraid, when you fucking violated her?” My voice didn’t match the storm of rage that was tearing through my chest. I didn’t know why I sounded so calm. Maybe I was in shock too.

I leaned forward and whispered into his ear. “You’re going to die sucking on this gun like the little bitch you are.”

He sobbed and I pushed the gun deeper into his mouth, before pulling back to look him in the face.

“Any last words?” I asked, and he opened his mouth wider, trying to speak around the firearm. Before he could make a sound, I fired two rapid shots into the back of his throat.

“No one fucking cares.” I spat on his corpse before compelling myself to stand.

I was shaking.

My ears were ringing, and the room felt like it was spinning.

Forcing myself to stay still, I took deep breaths in through my nose, and out through my mouth. I had not been this angry in a very long time. I needed to get a fucking grip on myself, I didn’t have time to fall apart.

I beat down the beast in my chest. Killing these fucking rapists hadn’t been enough. I wasn’t satisfied. The need to reduce the building where I stood into rubble was so overpowering, I wasn’t sure I would be able to calm down enough to be what Kasha needed me to be. The infuriatingly addictive scent of her, combined with the sound of her sobs and the reek of her shame was so triggering, I wasn’t sure I could move without putting my fist through the wall. After several more deep, shaky breaths, I turned slowly to face the bed.

Kasha was still child-shaped, and she was curled behind the pillow she had been clutching. It was nearly as big as she was, and she was quivering.

The rage left my body in a rush, and suddenly, all I could see was her. Dropping to my knees, I crawled to the side of the bed, snatching up the bloody shadowstone dagger from where I had dropped it as I moved. I tried to keep myself as small and unimposing as possible. I slid the gun into its holster, pressing up against the side of the bed.

“Kasha.” I said softly, reaching toward her. My fingers nearly brushed her shoulder, but she flinched away from me, curling tighter into her pillow. I pulled back and swallowed a horribly large lump that had suddenly formed, making it difficult for me to speak. I cleared my throat roughly before trying again.

“Kasha, it’s me.”

She still wouldn’t look up. She buried herself deeper into the soft embrace of the pillow, hiding behind it as if it were a shield.

“Hey… look at me.” I begged. My voice cracked, and I felt a wetness pool in the corner of my eyes. “Kasha, baby. Please.”

Her tiny body quivered, and she peeked over the top of the pillow, her large brandy eyes shimmering with terror.

She recognized me. I knew she knew who I was, but I was still a male. She was not going to just let me save her. She was too scared.

“I killed the monster, Kasha.” I told her softly, pointing to the mess of the daemon I had left on the floor. She looked at where I pointed, before turning back to stare at me, a large tear spilling down her round cheek. I eased an inch closer before pausing, to see if she would pull away.

She didn’t move. She just watched me, clutching her pillow so tight her tiny fingers were turning white. Slowly, I reached out again. I eyed her carefully, ready to stop the moment she showed any signs of fear. To my relief, she let me touch her this time, the tips of my bloody fingers brushing against the sleeve of her nightgown.