Page 33 of The Holy Grail

Catching up

It was still relatively early in the evening when Evan glanced up to see David arriving at Three Amigos. Evan hadn’t seen his friend in several weeks, so it was a welcome sight.

“Hey, man,” he called out. “It’s good to see you.”

“Good to see you, too, Dick,” David returned, sitting on a stool and placing his forearms on the polished surface of the wooden bar.

“You want something to drink?” Evan asked, only to pivot almost immediately. “Wait? Are you allowed to drink?”

“Why wouldn’t I be allowed to drink?”

“Well, things change when you get married. Or so I’ve heard.”

“They don’t change that much. I can still have a beer when I want.” Then, apparently seeing Evan was just throwing shit, David raised his eyebrows and said blandly, “Why don’t you quit being a dick and get me a beer? That is what I came in here for, after all.”

“I thought you came in for the company.”

David glanced around at the sparsely populated bar, then back to Evan. “Oh, you meant you. ”

After rolling his eyes, Evan rummaged around in the cooler and pulled out three bottles, setting them in front of David—a Sheep Shagger, a Purple Monkey Dishwasher, and a Great Big Kentucky Sausage Fest .

After much consideration, David chose the Great Big Kentucky Sausage Fest. Evan returned the other two bottles to the cooler, before handing David a glass and leaning against the bar. “Speaking of marriage, how’s Cat Lady?”

“She’s great. She just had another doctor’s appointment, and we got a new ultrasound.

” David dug out his wallet and retrieved a small, grainy black and white picture from inside, then slid it over to Evan, who eagerly took it.

He knew, because of Paige’s history, she was having one done every month, and so each month he got to see the current picture of what had been determined to be a boy.

“He’s looking good,” Evan approved.

“Yes, he is.”

Evan squinted at the picture. “You know, I think his penis has gotten a lot bigger since last month. In fact, I think it might be almost as big as yours—”

“Piss off.”

Evan handed the sonogram back with a chuckle before turning serious. “So, how’s Jacob?”

David finished pouring his beer and took a quick drink before answering.

“He’s good. He loves his kindergarten class, even though his ‘girlfriends’, Kelsey and Emma, are in it, and he and Paige are like two peas in a pod—they get closer every day.

I think she’s trying to form a really strong bond with him before the baby arrives. ”

“Is he looking forward to being a big brother?”

David nodded.

“That’s great.” Then, after a pause, Evan asked, “How’s Jacob doing with all the Ashley fallout?”

“He’s had a few bad days, but he’s had several more therapy sessions and seems to be adjusting relatively well … but I think most of that is Paige’s influence, to be honest. She understands him on a level no one else does, and he really responds to that.”

“He’s probably responding to having a real mother for the first time in his life, too.”

David held up his glass in a mock salute to Evan’s comment. “That, too,” he agreed with a big smile. Then, changing the subject, he said, “So, I heard Jules is working for you on the weekends. Doing bookkeeping or something like that?”

“Yeah. She started back in January. She’s going through our books to find ways to cut costs and increase profits.”

“How did that come about? ”

“She was here one night and we got talking about … stuff. Anyway, she was convinced something wasn’t right, based on my answers, and she offered to look into the numbers.”

“Is she finding anything?”

“I don’t know. We agreed she would present everything at the meeting with Everett and Evelyn, which should be pretty soon.”

“How’s that going? Working with her, I mean.”

“It’s fine.”

David knew his friend well enough to know when he was being evasive. “I’m not sure I believe you.”

“It’s fine,” Evan repeated, this time trying to sound more convincing. “I mean, it would be better if she wasn’t seeing someone, but … it’s whatever. It’s fine.”

“So, you know she’s seeing someone?” It came out as more of a statement than a question.

Evan nodded. “She told me. Right before I was going to make a move on her.”

“Oh, really? That’s awkward.”

“Yeah, it was pretty awkward and sucked balls. I’ve been kicking myself in the ass ever since that night for waiting so long and missing my window of opportunity. Especially after she admitted there was something between us.”

“Shit, man, I’m sorry.”

“It is what it is.”

There was a long moment of silence, and then David said slowly, “So, we had him over for dinner the other night. The guy she’s seeing.”

“You did?”

It was David’s turn to nod. “It was Paige’s idea.”

“How did it go? Actually, you know what? I don’t want to know.”

“Okay.”

“Fuck, no I do want to know.” Evan plastered on his best neutral expression and dove in, head first. “So, what’s he like?”

David gave him a long look before answering. “He’s a nice guy.”

“That’s it? He’s a nice guy? You know, you’re not going to upset me by telling me he’s really good looking or anything like that.”

“Okay, well, he actually is really good looking—”

“Fuck, I knew it.”

“See? Now, you’re upset. ”

“No. I just knew he wasn’t going to be ugly. He’s probably successful, too, with a great job, right?”

“He’s a lawyer.”

“A lawyer? I thought Jules had a thing against dating lawyers. Like, a vehement thing.”

“I did too, but she obviously made an exception for him. Although she did say he wasn’t a very good lawyer … and he actually agreed with her, so it must be true, which is pretty funny.”

Evan could only hope the guy wasn’t a very good lover, either. “So, she’s dating a lawyer who isn’t even a good one?”

“It seems so.”

Evan made a face. “That means he probably has a massive cock. Yeah, I’ll bet he does.”

“I don’t know anything about that.” David held up his hands. “It didn’t come up in conversation, and I never did see it, so … it could be small. You never know.”

“Right. I’m sure Jules would waste her time on a bad lawyer with a small cock, even if he is hot. Nice try.” Evan took a deep breath. “Did they seem, you know … solid?”

“Pretty solid, I’d say. I’ve never seen Jules with another man like this, so it was a new experience for me to see her being affectionate and …

enamored …” David trailed off for a moment.

“And it was a new experience to see a man dote on her. I think this could get really serious, if it’s not already headed there. ”

It was Evan’s turn to hold up his hands. “Okay, I think I’ve heard enough.”

The guy was obviously way more put together, not to mention a better catch than Evan was, which was another shovelful of dirt thrown on his coffin.

He should have felt happy for Jules and this guy, felt thrilled they were so happy together, but …

he wasn’t. What he felt was the urge to go have several drinks, pass out, wake up and have several more.

For the first time, he felt a profound solidarity with Paige, and what she’d had to endure when David had been with someone else.

David’s tone was full of sympathy. “Will you be okay in group situations?”

“I don’t ever plan on meeting the guy in person, so …”

“Are you serious? You’re never going to hang out with Paige and me if he’s there with Jules?”

“What? Is that too immature?”

“Uh, yeah. And not realistic at all.” David sighed, not liking to see his friend in such turmoil. “Jesus, I’m really wishing I hadn’t said anything about him.”

“I wanted to know. ”

“No, you didn’t,” David scoffed.

“Fine. I didn’t want to know, but I needed to know. And now that I know … I can totally move on with my life and start getting laid again.” At David’s arched eyebrows, Evan added, “I’ve been keeping to myself lately.”

“Is that a masturbation reference?”

“No. It just means I’ve been … celibate for a while.”

“Then why didn’t you just say that?”

“Because I don’t like saying it, let alone hearing how it sounds.”

“‘This, too, shall pass’,” David said.

“Did you just quote somebody to me, in an attempt to make me feel better?” Evan narrowed his eyes. “Christ, you’ve become a terrible friend since you got married.”

David released a soft chuckle, because even when salty, Evan was fun. “I have no idea who originally said it, but my mom used to say it to me all the time, so I’m sharing her wisdom with you.”

“So it’s like hand-me-down wisdom, got it.” Evan pointed a finger at David. “And that terrible friend thing still stands.”

Just then, David’s phone whooshed with an incoming text, which he quickly checked. After reading it, his expression softened into one of amused affection, telling Evan it was from Paige. His friend was a thousand percent whipped … and Evan was jealous as hell.

“A message from Cat Lady?” he asked.

“Yes. She wants me to bring home an order of spicy chicken wings,” David answered. “Her cravings are all over the place, and she’s suddenly all about spicy food, believe it or not. She’s been putting hot sauce on almost everything.”

“Do you want an order of eight wings, or sixteen?”

“Sixteen. She’s also been eating like a ranch hand—but don’t you ever tell her I said that. She’ll kick my ass.”

Evan pondered that. “I might have to tell her, just so I can watch it happen.”

Grinning, Evan went back to the kitchen to put the order in and when it was ready, he told David it was on the house.

“Okay, thanks,” David said, then pulled two twenties out of his wallet, anyway.

“I just said the wings were on the house,” Evan said, with a reproachful look.

“I know. This is the tip.”

“Forty dollars? For a free order of wings? ”

Ignoring Evan, David looked to where the tip jar usually was, and finding it missing, asked. “Where’s your tip jar?”

“I got rid of it.”

“Really? Why?”

Evan briefly explained why and said Lars’ time at the bar was hopefully limited.

“Okay, then I’ll just give this directly to you,” David said, laying the money on the bar and sliding it toward Evan, who made another face. “What? The service was amazing.”

When it was time to go, David started to head out, only to turn back to Evan. “There are other crazy women out there, Dick. And crazy men, too,” he added.

“I know,” Evan murmured.