Page 102 of The Holy Grail

“Whatever.” Martin took a deep breath. “Look, I understand the allure of fantasy. I admit, I did some kinky shit in college, but that wasn’t real life, and neither is this thing you have going with Jules and Evan. I mean, how long do you think this will last?”

“Well, I’m planning on it lasting a long time,” Malcom answered, doing his best imitation of Martin’s condescending tone.

“Was this Jules’ idea?”

“Why would you ask that?”

“Because this doesn’t seem like something you’d come up with on your own, to be honest, so I have to wonder if this is a result of her … influence … over you during the past seven months.”

Inside the library, Jules and Evan could pretty much hear everything, since the glass in the French doors was single-pane, and while Martin was keeping his voice low, Malcom wasn’t .

“Do you think ‘influence’ is really his code word for your pussy?” Evan asked Jules in a whisper.

She gave a quick snort. “Maybe. It’s obvious he doesn’t have a very high opinion of me.”

“I don’t have a very high opinion of him ,” Evan responded. “Which means we probably won’t be best friends.”

Outside, Malcom was giving Martin a dirty look. “You think she pushed me into this?”

“Did she?”

“No. No. It was our idea—mine, Evan’s and Jules’. The three of us, because we’re a triad, with three equal sides. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

Jules had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. “How much do you really think he’s had to drink?”

“Probably more than the three and a half he owned up to,” Evan answered, his lips twitching in amusement. “However many he’s had, though, it’s making this a lot of fun.”

“Speaking of Evan,” Martin said out on the balcony, his tone dismissive, “I have a few questions about that guy.”

“‘That guy’?” murmured Evan. “Did you hear how he said that?”

Jules nodded. “He doesn’t have a very high opinion of you, either.”

They watched as Malcom loosened his tie, took it off, and after seemingly not being able to find a pocket to put it in, tossed it over the railing onto the yard below, making them both laugh.

“Do you think we should intervene?” Jules asked.

Evan shook his head as he inched a little closer to the doors. “Hell, no. Not yet, anyway.”

“What questions do you have about Evan?” Malcom asked Martin, sounding a little belligerent.

“Are you having sex with him?”

“I’ve had oral sex with him.”

“What about … anal sex?”

The way Martin said it, made Jules and Evan laugh again.

“That really pained him to ask that,” Evan mused. “I bet his ass sphincter was clenched the whole time.”

“No, I haven’t had anal sex with him, yet,” Malcom answered, doing another spot-on impersonation of his brother. “But my ass is on the table, so … hopefully soon. All three of our asses are on the table, in case you were going to ask about that, next. ”

Evan raised a fist in the air, so Jules could fist-bump him, only to frown when Martin began speaking again.

“Do you know his sexual history? Do you even know if he’s clean?”

“Yes, I do. Jesus, he’s not an irresponsible asshole.” Malcom pointed a finger at Martin. “And that was really fucking rude.”

“Did you pick up this habit of swearing from Evan?”

“Uh, no. I was swearing long before I ever met him. So, do you have any more stupid questions for me?”

“What about Jules and Evan? Have they had sex?”

“With one another? Yes. And if you’re going to ask if I was watching when they did, the answer to that is also ‘yes’, and it was pretty fucking outstanding—oh, that was a pretty good pun, wasn’t it?”

“They seem to really like each other … are you worried about that?”

Evan looked at Jules, who shrugged. “I do really like you.”

“What’s not to like?” Evan teased. “And I really like, you, too.”

“They actually love each other, and no, I’m not worried about that, because they love me, too,” Malcom said to Martin. “And don’t use that tone of voice when talking about them.”

“What tone?”

“The tone which says you think they crawled out of a gutter somewhere and are after my money or something, because they’re not. They wanted to pay rent, for God’s sake.”

“Rent?”

“They’re living with me.”

Martin blinked, then said, “Look, I’m just extremely concerned about the drastic lifestyle choices you’re making. I have to wonder if your divorce from Gwen damaged you in ways that are causing you to be so … reckless with your life.”

“Fucking Gwen,” Malcom muttered, before raising his voice. “You don’t know shit about Gwen. If you did, you’d know the damage was done to me before the divorce, not after, so don’t ever mention her to me again.”

Martin held up his hands. “I’m sorry—”

“Don’t be sorry, just quit being stupid.

I’ve never been this happy in my life. Ever.

Jules and Evan mean everything to me, and if you can’t see that, you’re on the far end of the douchebag spectrum.

And if you can’t be happy for me, then I really don’t want you in my life, because I don’t want your judgment, or your disapproval, or your concern. I’m not a fucking child.”

“I know you’re not a child, and I can see I was wrong to get into any of this when you’ve obviously had too much to drink—”

“You’d be wrong even if I was stone-cold sober, because it’s none of your business.

” Malcom gave his brother a cold look. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’m getting my two people and getting the fuck out of here.

I’ve had my fill of Monroe Hodge sycophants and frankly, I’ve had my fill of your monstrous house.

” Malcom pushed open one of the French doors, causing Jules and Evan to quickly step back.

“And just so you know, having a couple of law books on your desk, that you’ve never even read, does not make this room a fucking ‘library’. ”