Page 39

CHAPTER 38

GRADY

I ’d sat at the end of Jill’s driveway long enough that the sun had started to set. My folks were expecting me for a celebratory dinner, but I’d been sitting there, trying to find some other way to make this thing work.

Leaving Jill with tears in her eyes was about as close as I’d ever come to losing it.

Losing my mind, losing my temper, losing the tight fucking hold I had on my reality. I was so close to letting all the frustration and heartbreak just break free. This was so brutally unfair, but I had no one to fight. No opponent, no asshole. I had no way to win this, and it was breaking me in half.

Finally I had to get on the road, so I peeled out of the driveway and headed for home. I didn’t get a mile down the road before red and blue lights lit up behind me and the siren blared.

You’re fucking kidding me . I slammed my hand into my wheel as I pulled onto the shoulder. I didn’t need this right now.

“Look who finally showed up.” Without even looking I knew it was Joey’s voice. “Step out of the car, please, sir .”

I shoved my door open so hard he had to jump back out of the way. “Not now, Joe.”

He wore a bitter smirk. “Like there’s gonna be a better time?”

“I can’t handle you right now, so why don’t you just get it off your chest so I can go?” My hands were shaking, too many emotions hitting me at once.

Joey took a few steps away, but I knew he wasn’t done. “What was the point of all this, Holloway? She’s fucking wrecked and you’re what? What is this?” He waved his hand at me, disgusted.

I didn’t want to hear him say Jill was wrecked. Not when I could still feel her in my arms, taste her lips on mine. “I don’t know what you want from me. You want me to say I fucked up? That I was wrong? Fine.” I threw my hands up. “I fucked up, Joey, okay. I fell in love with your sister even when I knew there was no fucking way she’d want to be a part of my life.”

Joey froze, his eyes pinning me hard. “You left.”

I sighed. “I had to go back to work, man. But it wasn’t over. It didn’t have to be over.”

The way he was watching me I started to pity the people he came to arrest. There was little about Joey that was soft or kind unless he wanted to be. Not like Jill. She was compassionate and warm as a default.

“You love her?” He said it like it was incomprehensible to him.

“Yeah, I do.” I leaned back against the side of my car, the fight falling out of me. “Doesn’t matter though. She’s right. You were both right.”

Joey let out a sigh so loud it drew my gaze. “Jesus, Grady.” The pity that laced his words only made me feel worse.

“It’s fucking killing me that she’s hurting,” I told him, the words like knives in my throat.

He came to lean against my car next to me. “She is,” he paused, looking at me out of the corner of his eye. “But, she’s not like she was before. She’s still upright. Hell, she might be about to open that damn store finally.” He huffed out a laugh, like he was impressed.

“She is?” Jill not mentioning that landed like another punch.

“Yeah. So, I wasn’t right about everything. Last time she stopped eating and shit. This time,” he paused, looking me over like I was a sad sight. “I think she loves you too. But you left her better than you found her, so she can keep going.”

I sucked in a sharp breath. Jill had never even come close to saying that to me. She made me feel loved plenty of times, but she’d always watched her words. And right then, I realized how much I’d needed to hear that.

“I only ever wanted her to be happy.”

“I know. And she was. I’d never seen her like that, not since we were kids.”

A rush of emotions hit me, and I crossed my arms over my chest, barricading myself from them. “Will you tell me when the shop opens?”

Joey shoved off my car, his hands on his hips like normal. “Sure. I’ll text you.”

“Thanks, man,” I said, yanking my door open. “I’ll see you around.”

“Grady,” Joey called. He looked apologetic. “I’m sorry.”

I shook my head. “I’m not.”