Page 27

CHAPTER 26

GRADY

A t this point I was utterly certain that the only thing that could get me out of the crap mood I’d been in since practice was the sight of the hottest librarian in Maine walking toward me.

Jill had on a long, flowing green skirt dotted with tiny flowers and a white blouse that had a wide enough V-neck that I could see the well of her collarbones. Her lush brown hair was wavy and wild, catching the wind as she came down the sidewalk. She was like some sort of sweet, hippie flower child—until you looked up and saw the fuck-me eyes she was giving me. The woman was such an exhilarating mix of energies, there was no way to ever get bored around her.

“Hey, hot shot,” she said, beaming at me as I pushed off the wall to give her a hug. My arms closed around her like they’d been doing it for years, the comforting scent of her lavender soap seeping into me like a drug. One I sorely needed after the last twenty-four hours.

I didn’t let her go right away, holding her tight and drinking her in for an extra second before I eased back to kiss her. It was the middle of the day in our gossipy little town, but I didn’t care. This was the first second of peace I’d felt since getting back and I wanted to be greedy with her.

“How are you?” I asked, when I finally let her go enough to stare into her sparkling brown eyes.

She held my gaze questioningly. “I’m better than you, I think?”

I huffed out a laugh, not even mad she’d picked up on my mood. At this point Jill read me like a book, and I’d actually grown to like it.

“I’m better now,” I told her honestly, taking her hand and walking into Ernie’s.

The retro diner was one of the oldest restaurants in town. The red vinyl booths and shiny chrome edges elevated the otherwise standard diner fair into an experience the tourists thought was cute, and the locals found reassuring.

“What happened in Boston?” Jill asked casually, glancing at me over her menu.

I closed mine and tossed it on the table, knowing there was no point in looking. I always got the same thing: double smash burgers and extra fries.

“Not much. Just a long day.”

“Why didn’t you stay down there?”

“Cause then I couldn’t be here doing lunch with you.”

She gave me a look, not buying a word of it. “You could have just as easily driven up this morning.”

I scratched the back of my head. I didn’t want to spend my time with Jill talking about hockey. It dominated my mind every second I was away from her, and that was how it should be. But while I had the woman’s gorgeous smile on me in real time, hockey was the last thing I wanted to think about.

Leaning forward, I got her attention. “I’d rather talk about what we’re going to do tonight .” I wasn’t sure I was ready to give Jill what she’d been asking for, but there were still a variety of options playing out in my head.

“I can’t,” she said, frowning.

My stomach twisted. “Oh.”

Laying her menu on top of mine, she sighed. “I’d love to. But I have a work thing.”

“Gotcha. What kind of ‘thing’?” I was trying hard to keep the disappointment out of my voice but a night on my own wasn’t at all appealing at the moment.

“One of those silly lake tours. It’s a fundraiser for the library’s new computer lab, I think? I don’t even know. I wasn’t supposed to have to go, but Cleo asked me out of the blue the other day.”

“She asked you because you’re the current face of the library, and you’re doing awesome.” Her cheeks pinked at my praise, which only made me want to give her more. “I bet you get a promotion out of all this.”

Now her face really got red. “I don’t think so.”

“Why not? You’re great at your job, Jill. The kids at our programs love you.”

She shook her head. “They love you . I’m just the book lady.”

Nudging her leg under the table I smirked at her. “The sweet, kind, hot book lady. The book lady they all run to as soon as I’m done. The one they whisper their jokes to.”

The quietest of kids loved her, trusted her. There was no question why; her energy was so accepting, so supportive. She might think she was just the logistical coordinator for this whole thing, but I could see it from the start. Her presence changed the tone of every event and I knew without a doubt more kids were going to get into reading because of her.

“You’re going to go out on that boat and charm the wallets right off the rich snobs who bought a ticket. After a glass of wine or two, they won’t even realize that you’ve got them eating out of your hand.”

She laughed at me, but I could see the way she pulled her shoulders back. Some part of her wanted to win at this, wanted to prove—maybe just to herself—that she could be someone she’d never been before.

“I think you got hit a little too hard in the head, Holloway,” she muttered as the waitress approached. “But thank you.” She dipped her head, a tiny smirk playing on her lips that I wanted to see a lot more often.

“You don’t really have to do this,” Jill said as I walked her down the hill toward the commercial docks. Unlike the quiet town marina around the other side of the cove, this was where the tourists came to rent their jet skis and climb aboard old-fashioned cruise boats for their narrated tours of the lake. It was July third and the tourist season was in full effect. Even the bar that sat on the far side of the boardwalk was packed, and it was barely two in the afternoon.

“It’s no big deal,” I said, unwilling to admit that I’d just wanted to spend as much time with her as I could before I headed home to an empty house.

“They’re already boarding.” Her eyes were locked on the crowd of well-dressed banker and lawyer types who were handing their tickets to the attendant at the end of the dock.

I spotted Cleo Hawkins, Jill’s boss. She was greeting everyone as they came aboard, pointing out the observation deck, complete with a bar at one end. I’d been on a few of those boat tours myself over the years and it was a given that at least one person was going to get sloppy before they returned to the dock. Something about booze and open water.

Glancing at Jill, I suddenly didn’t love the idea of her being out there with a bunch of entitled trust fund managers who got their rocks off of feeling like they owned the things they invested in. Including her.

“I should get over there.” She went to hug me goodbye but stopped short.

“What?” I spun to look at what had caught her eye.

Across the parking lot, walking casually toward the boat, was none other than the asshole himself. Adam.

“ He’s going?” she whispered, the words sort of falling out of her in disbelief.

My first instinct was to take a hold of her. I wrapped one arm around her waist possessively, even though the guy was fifty feet away and hadn’t even looked in our direction.

“You don’t have to go.”

She huffed out a resigned laugh. “Yes I do. You even said it yourself, this is important to the library, which means it’s important for me to keep my job.”

Fuck . I ground my teeth, tugging her closer. I didn’t like this.

“I’ll be fine. I just can’t believe he bought a ticket,” she muttered in disbelief.

Of course he had. I’d seen it in his eyes at the Sea Dogs game. That asshole hadn’t liked that Jill was moving on, living her life—and doing better than she ever had while he was here.

“And that’s his mom.” She sighed, dropping her head.

I wanted to punch the guy all over again. She’d been so happy at lunch, so animated and alive. And now she was dreading what was supposed to be a fun night strutting her stuff and getting the attention she deserved. We watched as he and his mother walked up the ramp and were greeted warmly by her boss.

“I’m coming with you.”

Jill’s head whipped up. “No. Grady, you don’t have to do that.”

My eyes were fixed on the water as I swallowed. I hadn’t been on a boat or out over water since the drowning. Hell, I’d avoided seeing my folks on Peak’s because I couldn’t get on the damn ferry. But I pushed out an angry breath; I wasn’t letting her get on that boat alone with that fucker.

“Let’s go,” I said, taking her hand. A tremor worked up my arm as we started toward the group and she yanked me back.

“Stop. Just wait.”

“We’re going to miss the boat.” There were only a few people left in line to board.

“You’re shaking,” she whispered, her brow scrunched up with worry.

I swallowed again, this time not from nerves, but from how she made me feel. How beautiful she was when she looked at me with that kind of understanding. I’d never felt this weak before, but somehow Jill managed to look at me like she knew exactly what was going on, and it still didn’t take anything away from me. She’d never let me doubt that she felt safe by my side—and like she’d never leave it no matter how messed up I might get. I didn’t know how to explain it, but it was as if it didn’t hurt as much to be this version of myself when I had her hand in mine.

“I am,” I admitted, kissing the back of her hand. “But I’m also okay. I’ll be fine, because I’ll be with you.”

Working on overcoming my fear hadn’t been on my agenda for the day, but fuck it. There were only two choices here, and one of them was entirely out of the question.

“Come on.” I started walking again and Jill reluctantly fell in step beside me.

As we made our way up the ramp that led over the water, she squeezed my hand and I kept my eyes straight ahead. At the top her boss looked between the two of us, her smile growing wide and greedy. I’d been used as a marketing piece my entire career, but something about the glint in her eye when she realized I was coming, too, made me feel more dirty and used than I had in a long time.

“Mr. Holloway, what a marvelous surprise,” Cleo exclaimed, getting the attention of enough of the crowd that Jill shrunk next to me.

“Happy to join,” I said, keeping my voice low but polite. “I couldn’t let Jill have all the fun.”

Instantly I regretted my words. Jill was more than capable of doing this on her own, and I hadn’t meant to steal any more of the spotlight from her. Lord knows I already did at the events with the kids. The last thing I wanted to do was grandstand at an event that should have been hers to shine.

“Well, we’re so happy you’re here. The literacy program is an excellent example of how well we can serve the community given the resources.”

I pinned my fake smile in place while she spouted her pitch. It was aimed at everyone within earshot—which was quite the distance given how loudly she was speaking—not me.

“I think you’ve got your greatest resource right here,” I replied, giving Jill’s hand a shake. She turned her smile up to me, but it wasn’t her typical warm grin. Her eyes were narrow and I could tell she was hating every second of this. Cleo went to say something else, but I cut her off, “We’re going to grab ourselves a drink, but we’ll be back.”

Without waiting for her to reply, I turned and led Jill toward the stairs. The breeze was stronger on the top deck and as soon as we crossed the threshold of the tiny metal doorway the wind hit me in the face. It felt good.

There were fewer people up top and I scanned quickly to see if Adam was one of them. I didn’t spot him, which was good. If we could get off this boat without coming face to face with him, that would be ideal for everyone.

“You all right?” Jill asked, her hands landing on my chest as she searched my face.

It took me a second to realize what she meant; we’d pulled away from the dock and were headed out into the heart of the lake, nothing but deep water all around us.

I closed my eyes, willing my heartbeat to slow down. Between Adam and the lake it was thudding hard enough Jill couldn’t miss it under her hand.

I laid mine on top of hers, pressing down so I could feel every inch of her warm skin against my chest, and let out a rueful chuckle. “I might be rethinking this idea.”

She laughed. “Too late for that, sport.”

Sighing, I rested my forehead on hers, craving her touch like a balm. “Then we better get some drinks to help calm me down or this is going to be a long ride.”

With a beer in hand, Jill and I made our way to the rows of bench seats that filled the middle of the upper deck. Most of the crowd was milling about, a few loud outbursts of laughter breaking into the otherwise pleasantly quiet ride. The mountains rose up along the northwestern horizon, and I kept my eyes fixed on their spiny peaks anytime they weren’t on Jill.

After a few minutes my pulse had leveled off and I turned to scan the deck again. Still no sign of Adam. I wondered if he’d seen me join Jill and was going to do the smart thing and stay the hell away from us. But I wasn’t going to let the guy fuck up this chance for her any more than I was going to let her babysit me here on the benches.

“Ready to mingle?”

“We don’t have to. We can hang here.”

I shook my head at her, pushing off the bench. “No way. We’re not missing this chance to show you off to your adoring fans.” I winked at her when she looked up at me skeptically. If I had the chance to throw this back at her the way she had when I got swarmed for autographs, I was going to take it and run.

“On your feet, gorgeous.” I held out my hand and when she took it, I pulled her up beside me. I leaned in close, so only she could hear. “I’ll be right there with you, unless you want me to stay back.” I wasn’t going to offer to let her go off on her own with Adam somewhere in the crowd. But I could give her a little space to do her thing.

She looked around us, assessing the smiling faces and full wine glasses. “I think you said we were a team once, right?” I nodded, unable to fight the smile that took over my face. “Then we stick together.”

Part of me wondered if she was saying that because she didn’t want me to be alone either. But even if that was the case, I didn’t mind. We were a team, and I loved that she wanted to act like it.

Maneuvering through the crowd was easy. It was a gorgeous night and the funds being raised were for a good cause. The more Jill was asked questions about the literacy program, the more she shined. One after another, folks gravitated toward her, until I was nothing more than a smiling body at her side, my eyes on the crowd as she commanded their attention. In these small groups she was fine, her confidence unwavering. It was just when the crowds got too large that she flinched and retreated.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” Cleo called from the front of the boat, clinking her glass to get the crowd to quiet down. “We are so glad all of you could join us tonight. The library is here to support our community, but in order for us to do that we need the support of our community. The money raised today will go directly to our new technology initiative, aiming to bring innovative and timely resources to our region that so desperately needs them.” She waited for the crowd’s applause to die down, but when she started up again, her eyes were locked on Jill and I.

“We’ve already seen just how much good our library can do, thanks to our friend in the back, Mr. Grady Holloway.”

The crowd got loud again and I gave a brief wave, my face plastered with the smile I’d learned to wear years ago. It made me feel numb at first, but then when Cleo went on without mentioning Jill, I felt worse.

“With partnerships like that, and your generous support, we can give the region the leg up it needs to provide the education and access to change lives. All of our lives. So, thank you for being with us.” She held up her glass and the crowd followed, a round of cheers filling the air before everyone went back to their conversations.

I downed the last of my beer, the warm dregs in the bottle souring on my tongue. “That was a load of horseshit,” I whispered, turning toward Jill, my hands finding the rail behind us as my gaze coasted down to the water below.

“It’s fine,” she said, spinning in place beside me. “I’m not the draw. Never was.”

“That’s bullshit,” I hissed, working hard to keep my voice down even though I wanted to tell every one of these fuckers just who had made that program a success. “You’re the only reason that the whole program hasn’t devolved into a romper room reading hour with kids climbing the walls and parents leaving with nothing more than some signed hockey pucks. I’m not the one doing this. You are . And I know you don’t like attention, but damn it, you deserve the credit for this, babe.”

Jill’s eyes flicked up to meet mine, her bottom lip caught in her teeth even as it curled up into a smile. “You’re kind of cute when you’re like this,” she whispered, leaning conspiratorially into my chest.

“You’re kind of cute every fucking second,” I whispered back, reaching to tuck a stray hair behind her ear. “I wish we weren’t on a boat so we could blow this popsicle stand.”

She laughed, nodding as she sighed and leaned on the rail. “I think trapping people on a boat and liquoring them up is the legally acceptable version of extortion.”

I laughed. “They won’t turn the boat around until people hand over their checks?”

“Exactly.”

Only the boat had turned around. We were only a few minutes from docking back in Holden Cove and I was probably giddier about that than a grown man should have been.

“Two excursions in one month? Good for you,” a voice came from behind us. Before I even looked, I knew who to expect. Adam was standing with his glass of white wine in hand, eyes fixed on Jill with a slick grin that matched the condescension in his tone. “You really are making progress.”

Jill straightened beside me and I slipped my hand along her back, wrapping my fingers around her hip and squeezing.

I was convinced this guy had gotten bullied as a kid, and that he’d deserved it. Whatever arrogance I might have been guilty of, it was nothing compared to the air of superiority that wafted off this asshole. But what was worse was the coldness in his eyes as he looked Jill over from head to toe and back up again, as if his assessment alone could unseat any of the confidence she’d felt tonight.

“You, on the other hand, seem to have a hard time with basic comprehension,” I said, keeping my voice low as I twisted and brought Jill against my chest. “Maybe you’re one of those who learns through hands-on experience, though, huh?” I let the menace I was feeling for this guy seep into my words.

“I’m sure this is hard for you to understand, being the center of attention in most of the circles you travel in.” He sighed, his gaze sliding over to assess me this time. “But I wasn’t talking to you.”

The boat horn went off, startling Jill, who tensed even tighter into me. We were so close to getting off this fucking boat and away from this asshole, I needed her to hold on just one more minute.

“What do you want, Adam?” she asked, proving him wrong with more strength in her voice than she’d had the last time we’d seen her ex.

He still wore the same snide grin when he looked back at her. “I simply wanted to see how you were, Jill. See if you’d like to get lunch while I’m in town.”

I scoffed louder than I should have, since Jill was more than capable of telling this guy where to shove it.

“No, thank you,” she said, shaking her head as she looked away, watching the boat crew tie up and slide the ramp across to the dock.

“That’s a shame. I’d have thought by now you’d be ready to put all that behind you.”

Jill’s mouth opened and then shut again, her eyes closing tightly as if she was struggling to understand what this guy wanted. I knew though, and I’d had enough.

Taking Jill’s hand in mine I stepped forward, forcing Adam to shift back. “She’s put it behind her asshole. You’re in the rearview getting smaller every fucking second. Now get the fuck out of our way, or you’ll be taking the short way off this boat.”

For a second he held my gaze, his eyes locked hard on mine like he was really gearing up to challenge me even as I towered above him. But finally he moved and I spun so Jill could walk in front of me while I blocked his stupid fucking glare.

It was rare for me to get this riled up off the ice, but I wanted to keep him away from Jill so bad I was vibrating. Her grip on my hand was vice-tight as we walked across the parking lot and we’d almost gotten to the street that led back up to where she’d parked when I heard someone coming up behind us.

When I spun I found Adam on our heel. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?” I looked behind him at the crowd still disembarking from the boat.

“Jill, I think you should consider something?—”

“The fuck you think you’re doing still talking to her?” I snarled, dropping Jill’s hand and stepping into Adam’s space as he came toward her. My restraint slipped by a notch, and I shoved him back, his loafers sliding on the pavement.

“You really are just a meathead, aren’t you?” he said, cocking his head to look past me. “I had no idea this was the direction you’d turn in light of my absence?”

My ears started ringing. Not from the insult, I couldn’t care less what this jerk thought of me. But from how hard I was fighting the urge to break his fucking jaw so he couldn’t say anything else to her.

“I’m giving you one last chance to walk out of this with your face intact, but you say one more word to her and you’re done.” My fists were so tight they hurt, his beady eyes glaring up at me as he smiled.

“You ever let her speak?”

That was it, I pulled back to punch the smirk right off his face when Jill appeared in front of me.

“Grady, don’t. Please.”

When I froze, Adam went to push her out of the way and I launched, picking Jill up in one arm as I shoved him backwards with the other. He stumbled, landing on his ass just as the crowd came rushing up toward us. Among them was a familiar uniform and an even more familiar face. Joey glared at me for a split second before he saw Jill and shook his head.

I cursed, watching as someone helped Adam to his feet before I turned back to Jill, putting her down beside me.

“He’s not worth it,” she said, her hands cupping my face, making me look at her instead of the guy getting dusted off by his mother.

I felt the tremble in her hands as she held me. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

She didn’t look fine. Her chin wobbled even as she tried to suck in a breath. She was too far from fucking fine, and I had to fight to not barrel into that guy for doing this to her.

“Hey,” Joey’s voice came over my shoulder and I turned, giving him a view of Jill. “You alright?” he asked her, his eyes pinched in the corners like he’d seen enough to know she wasn’t.

She just looked at him for a second, glancing over at Adam who was talking to another deputy I hadn’t seen arrive. “I’m fine.” He didn’t look convinced and she shrugged. “The crowd, and everything.” At that her brother dipped his chin knowingly. This much attention was more than Jill could stand and he knew it.

“He says you shoved him,” Joey stated flatly, this time looking over at me.

“He got in her face,” I said, biting back my anger as much as I could, because I knew guys like Adam and they always managed to paint the picture that made them the victim.

Joey nodded, looking to Jill for confirmation. She nodded back before the air rushed out of her. I wrapped her in my arms and she nestled against my chest. I wasn’t sure I’d done a god damn thing right in that whole situation, but she was still letting me hold her. That was all I needed.

“I’ll speak to him.” Joey’s eyes flicked to mine. “Can I talk to you?” He jerked his head for me to step away, but I glared back at him; I wasn’t letting her go. “Just a sec. Jilly, you okay for one sec?”

“You’re letting him come back, right?” She eyed her brother suspiciously and he sighed in exasperation.

“Yes. I promise.” His promise was enough for her, and I slowly let her step out of my grasp, but I didn’t fucking like it.

Joey and I took a handful of steps away from everyone and he lowered his voice. “What the fuck are you thinking?”

My head jerked back. “You seriously going to ask me that right now?”

Joey hated that asshole as much as me, and he’d hated him longer. All you had to do was look at Jill to see her shrink whenever he was around. Whatever mind games he’d played on her, he deserved more than a god damn shove.

“Yeah. You change careers and not tell me? Cause getting arrested for assault is a pretty fucking good way to lose your fucking spot on the team.”

I blew out a harsh breath, lacing my fingers behind my head as I looked up at the sky. He was right. I could fight all I wanted on the ice, but Blaise wouldn’t let something like this go without consequence. And given the thin ice I was already skating on, I, of all players, could not afford to mess up this badly.

“Fuck.”

“Yeah,” he snapped. Glancing back at Jill his expression softened. “That said”—he looked me in the eyes—“I appreciate it.”

I shook my head. “Man, I would never let that fucker touch her.”

“I know.” He held up a finger to the deputy that was approaching. “I’ll deal with this. But you need to be more careful. That guy had everyone fooled for years. He’s a master manipulator and I saw the way he looked at you. He’s got your number now, so you need to walk away if you see him again.”

“I tried Joe. He followed us.”

With a resigned nod, he cleared his throat. “I got it. I won’t let this go any further.” When he looked back at me there was an apology in his eyes. “I’m sorry for the other day. That was a cheap shot.”

“It’s okay.” I was hoping we could put all of this behind us. I looked over at Jill, her arms clasped around her middle as she stared down at the lake. “I’m gonna get her out of here, okay?”

“Yeah, go,” he paused, looking between us. “Take care of her.”

His words hit me in the chest. Cause Joey hadn’t trusted me with Jill before, but I could see it in his eyes that he did now. Maybe it was crazy all this had to happen to prove how much I cared about her, but I understood where he was coming from too much to be mad about that.

“I will.”

He patted me on the shoulder and walked back toward the others, and I went to Jill. The minute I opened my arms again she walked right into them, and I felt a hundred feet tall. Pounding Adam into the ground might have felt good, but nothing—I mean nothing—felt as good as holding my girl.