Page 89 of Reasons We Break

He mulls this over for exactly one second. “Yeah, fine.” If he doesn’t have to hang around the hospital, he won’t. “You gonna shove it in place on the count of three?”

“Turn toward me.” She shifts to face him, and he does the same. “Sit up straight and relax.”

“Those are two different things,” Rajan mutters, but he tries anyway. Kat takes his hand and puts it on her shoulder. She grips his arm with a gentle pull and, with the other, startsmassaginghis shoulder. “I don’t need a warm-up, just do it. And warn me first.”

“I said sit up straight. You’re slouching. And relax.”

He tries again. This issoweird. “Jesus, Kat. You sound like my mother.”

The words are out thoughtlessly, and he freezes, but her expression doesn’t change. “Well, once upon a time Iwasa mother. Just not a very good one.”

Rajan remembers, not for the first time, what she told him about her son.Shot dead. “Why not?” he asks slowly.

She takes a long time answering. “I was young, and had my own problems...I wasn’t ready to be a parent. If I were, maybe he wouldn’t have gone the way he did.”

She says nothing more. Rajan thinks again about the photo frame she hasn’t replaced. Maybe she can’t stand to look at it, the same way he could never take his bunny out of his suitcase. “You know,” he says carefully, “I don’t blame my mom for the stuff that happened to me. Maybe you’re right, maybe she wasn’t completely faultless. But I still don’t blame her. She was trying her best.”

Kat, still smiling, breaks eye contact to survey the waiting room for a long time. Then: “Well, I hope you also realize you didn’t make her illness worse. She was sick long before you lost your way.”

“Okay, but did you believe the bitIsaid?” Rajan arches a brow. “Because if you didn’t, I’m not going to try to convince myself ofyourbullshit.”

Kat laughs before dropping his arm. “All done.”

“What?” He lifts his arm and crosses it over his chest. Holy shit. His shoulder is back in place. And he barely noticed. Now, it’s more an ache rather than a red-hot knife. “But—I thought it was supposed to hurt.”

“Not all healing has to hurt, Rajan.” She pats his hand. “Go home now. And put it in a sling for a few days.”

Rajan gets up, and it’s only once he’s out the ER door that he realizes he still doesn’t know why Kat was there. He turns back, but his view is already obscured by the lineup.

He wanders down the street. It’s getting dark. The buses run less frequently now. On a whim, he calls Nick instead. His paranoia needs to be fully satisfied.

But when Nick arrives in a slick-looking Benz, he seems surprised.

“What happened?” he asks as Rajan gets in, awkwardly holding his arm.

“Well, funny thing, Nick.” Rajan slams the passenger door harder than necessary. “I fell off a roof at work.”

“Sucks.”

“Yeah. Someonehappenedto leave a hammer on the roof for me to trip on.”

Nick doesn’t say anything for at least a minute as he drives. Then: “Rajan, if I wanted you dead, I would just put a bullet in your brain.”

Well, that’s nice. But Rajan isn’t done. “Someone also narced to my PO that night I got high.”

“Remember how I said nobody in the LS likes you? Any petty little shit at the party could’ve done that. We all know you’re on probation.” Nick shoots him an amused look. “Christ, you’re paranoid. A hammer? Come on.”

Rajan scoffs. “Fuck you, dude.” But now he’s starting to feel stupid. Nick’s right. That’s not his style, and besides, would the Lions really want to kill him? Sure, Rajan is always in Simran’s ear—but it’s not like she listens.

Speaking of...“You have to promise me if anyone gives Simran a hard time about leaving at the end of July, you’ll handle it. I found you a new bookkeeper. Hell,I’llcome back if it helps sweeten the deal.” Nick actually tears his eyes off the road to look at him in surprise. “What? I’ll be done with probation soon.”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I can’t replace her, but—”

“You don’t want that. You don’t want to come back.”

Thatpisses Rajan off. “You’re the one who tried tomakeme come back.”