He shook his head with his mouth open, but nothing came out. “It’s too damn quiet in here… need some different music,” Des walked over to the Bluetooth record player.

He messed with it for a while before Juicy Fruit came on by Mtume. “God, this song brings so many memories for us… used to listen to this all the time while the boys ran around like crazy.” Jean reminisced about a time when things weren’t simpler but they were good.

Fawn lit a cigarette and tossed her head back. “Take me back… flying around the city on my bike without responsibilities, not tied down to no good men… Jesus,” she shook her head and stomped her timbs on the concrete floor.

Recommendation: Listen We Are One by Maze ft Frankie Beverly

“Nah, we need to switch it.” I walked over and switched the music to Maze. “This song brings back memories because it was so true for us… we’re all fucking one… you know?” I snatched Fawn’s cigarette and took a pull.

She looked at me like I had lost my mind, and I did. I would lose my mind every single time my children and wife were involved. I’d become a lunatic, and I have become one more than a few times.

“Gods stick together… once a God always one,” Buck said, as he sang out the words to the song.

I looked over at Larry, and this bitch had the nerve to be nodding his head to the music. As if he had been one with us. As if he hadn’t betrayed us in the worst way. “All the shit we been through, Papa.”

As I two stepped behind him with the cigarette between my fingers, my eyes grew wider. “Feeling that shit, Papa?” Des distracted me because I was about to put this cigarette out on his head.

“Yeah… we been through a lot. Remember when you drove Mina to the hospital when her water broke with Pop?”

He chuckled. “She screamed the entire time there… held onto my damn arm and dug her nails in. Should have known then he was going to be a problem.” Des handed him a drink, and he took it back.

It was only right that he had one last drink before being sent to hell. If I had to see him when it was my time, then he needed to know it was on sight. I would spend eternity squabbling with this nigga in hell.

The pain I felt in my chest was real because this was my brother. I had so many memories with this man and swore to always hold him down. I stuck to my word, and when his mother passed away, I paid for the funeral because money was tight for him.

I didn’t give a fuck how you made your money when you were an Inferno God.

You could sell broken barbie dolls to fucking first graders for all I cared.

The only rule I had was no selling pussy, and Larry had broken that rule a few times, but because of my respect and the level of our friendship, I often looked the other way when I should have aimed my gun at his head.

He promised me that he was done with that life, and I believed him.

How stupid of me to believe my friend of all these years.

I hated having a good heart at times. It pulled at me during the wrong times.

I remember when I was about to kill a man, I stopped because he didn’t want to be shot in the face.

Pussy was worried about his mama burying him, so I shot him in the chest.

I was a good person because I could have released all those bullets in his face. Very sweet. Very I’ll let you decide how you wanna go.

Larry didn’t get that option.

I should have known we were different when he lied to me again and was back to selling ass.

At that point, Quasim had stepped in. He was the nigga in charge, and the one that he had to deal with.

Let it had been me, I probably would have killed Larry’s ass then for having me looking stupid and lying to me.

I watched as my son walked into the so-called brothel, choked Larry up and tossed his ass down a flight of stairs.

Ever since Quasim cut off that stream of revenue for him, money been tight for his ass. I didn’t think he would betray us this way when we allowed him to live and breathe the same air as us. He was still welcomed at the warehouse to have drinks and kick the shit with us.

Nobody was going in their wallet to help his ass out. We’ve all been there and done that with Larry’s ass. Always loaning him money with the expectation that he would give it back. The closest thing I did was paying for his mama’s funeral, and that was because he loved his mama’s big ass draws.

Mina laughed, and I could tell she didn’t remember what we were talking about.

Some things came to her, and then others, she couldn’t remember; it would take time for it to all come back.

She didn’t need to remember because I would remind her every chance I had.

Witnessing my boys being born were the best days of my life, and I remembered everything.

A nigga didn’t need to watch the video tapes; I saw that shit in my head. “Do you remember, Mina?” Larry questioned.

“I don’t.” She became sad, not remembering when her boys came into the world.

Now I was really ready to bash his head in with this pool stick because he made my baby sad. He knew her ass couldn’t remember when he mentioned it, then gonna ask her if she remembered.

Larry took back his drink. “Papa was way across the city, and I was closer to you. Madalena was out the country, and you were home alone. That busted ass Acura got us there and had you giving birth a few hours later.”

“Couldn’t have done it with you, Lar… you came through for my wife.”

“Always.”

“Never missed a birthday for either of them, either… can’t find loyalty like that no more.” I went and sat on the pool table and nodded my head to the music.

“Those are my guys… always showed love and respect, even when they became older. So proud of both of them.”

“Yeah?”

Larry became more comfortable and turned to face me. “Yeah… you put a lot of pressure on yourself, Quinton. You raised those boys up right and they solid, too.”

“Yeah, I guess I did. Couldn’t have done it without Mina and Madalena.” I looked at my wife and she smiled at me.

Guilt plagued her as well, never knowing if we were doing right by our boys. We didn’t have a blueprint, and damn sure didn’t have our shit together. There were times when Mina would run out the house barefoot with a gun in one hand and Quasim on her hip because I stormed out.

We were young and stupid while trying to figure out being parents. There were other bitches that wanted me, and back then, I was stupid enough to slide and fall for it. Shit, Mina had niggas wanting to be Sim’s fucking stepdaddy.

Our marriage hadn’t always been easy and simple. It was complex and had many layers to it. There were times when we wanted to call it quits, when she kicked me out and swore she would raise our boys on her own.

My pride was too damn thick back then, never wanting to admit that I needed her. Allowing her to dispose of me because I felt like she was better off without me. I’ve never witnessed a successful relationship because I watched the most important relationship crash and burn right before my eyes.

It was easier to allow her to make the decision to end us than it was for me. No matter how much I knew I didn’t deserve her, I couldn’t leave her alone. I couldn’t stop craving that love that I had never experienced, because that was what I got from her.

The day I saw her on the corner of Ralph avenue and St John place in Brooklyn, pushing Pop in the stroller changed things for me. She had on a pair of short, cut-off shorts, like she hadn’t just given birth a few months prior.

Her freshly pressed hair fell down her shoulders, and she wore the thick ass herringbone chain I had bought her when Quasim was born.

Her thick thighs shined in the damn sun, making me bite my lip.

Her cropped shirt showed off her stomach, as if she didn’t just have a baby.

If anything, Quasim added to his mama, doing her body right.

She wore a dark pair of Versace sunglasses as she smiled up in some nigga’s face. He was smiling down at my son, while Mina flipped her hair over her shoulder, showing all her damn teeth. It was like she loved when I came outside of myself because it showed her that I cared.

I always cared.

I cruised across the street and beat that nigga’s teeth out his mouth, since he was using them to smile at what was mine. Mina had the power to make me give a fuck, and that was something I could never do before her.

Even after the police officer pulled me off him and put me in the back of the squad car, when I was bailed out the next day, Mina stood there while leaning against my bike.

We could never stay away from each other. Toxic in every way, and neither of us wanted to do away with the other. I wish I could say we got it right after that, but Mina Inferno made sure I proved to her how crazy and how far I would go.

Her crazy ass got a lot of niggas put on their necks, and when I slid up inside of her after each time, I knew there would be more I would fuck up because this woman had my mind in a vice grip.

Soon as her soft hands with those red nails caressed my face, it was all gas and no sense behind her.

“Damn, Papa, where the fuck you went?” Larry waved his hand in front of my face, and I looked up at him.

“You always loved my boys… remember that time me and Mina both got arrested? You held the boys down for us until Jean came to bail us out.”

Jean laughed. “I told her that pussy gal was a cop caller.”

Mina leaned her head on Jean’s shoulder, and she kissed her head. “Always been right.”

“Sometimes.”

Larry chuckled. “Always gonna look out for the boys.”

Des looked at Buck, who looked up from his phone, and then looked over at Fawn. “Then why did you try to take them from me, Lar?”

Larry’s face dropped as I looked up into his eyes. “What the fuck you talking about, Papa?”

I could tell he was nervous from the way he kept switching his phone from one hand to the other. “Red, my nigga? Really?”