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Chapter Sixty-Six

RAIN

T he next evening, Aspen spent time with Torian.

That meant Keir and I got to hang out, and while that was nice, I wasn't really a fan of this time-swap thing.

Hawke joined the pair of us on Wednesday, but on Thursday, Aspen made it clear we needed to study.

Torian came over to "pick her up" for their training, and she said no.

Yeah, he slammed her door when he left, but when I tried to talk about it, Aspen said it wasn't a big deal. Added to the fact that we really did need to study, I let it go. But on Friday, he didn't show up for lunch. Afterwards, I cornered Hawke in the gym to find out what was going on.

"He's trying to regain his control, Rain." Hawke shrugged. "When he needed it most, his magic failed him, and Torian does not like failure."

"Ah."

But that evening, Aspen was in our suite, waiting.

She had a package of Pixie Styx, a bucket of candied flowers, and she told me it was a date!

When I followed her into the lounge, I found Keir, Hawke, and Wilder had already claimed a set of chairs in front of a television.

The moment they saw us, Wilder picked up the remote and pressed a button.

Immediately, Disney's Peter Pan began to play.

"Movie night!" Keir announced.

Hawke looked over and said, "Wilder was trying to explain why he calls your shadow Peter Pan. Supposedly, he has a lot of the same similarities as a character in this movie. "

"It's her shadow," Keir pointed out. "That means it's not a 'he.'"

"It's an it," I said. "You know, because shadows don't have genders."

"Peter Pan's a guy, though," Wilder countered.

"I think it's a girl," Aspen said. "Mostly because we're outnumbered, enough."

"An it," I insisted.

Which was when my shadow pointed at me and nodded.

Thankfully, I wasn't the only one who saw it.

Keir laughed, Wilder groaned, but it didn't stop us from having our movie night.

That I got to snuggle with both Keir and Aspen - even if she was on Keir's other side to prevent any bad rumors - made it a very good night.

And yet something was off.

The Wild Hunt had come, we'd destroyed the item drawing them here, and yet no one was acting like this was a victory.

Instead, Torian had become obsessive about his magic, and Aspen had been avoiding him the last two nights.

Things between the guys were tense as well, making me think Torian wasn't any better with them.

Sadly, each time I brought it up, they said it was one of those things they couldn't talk about.

Yeah, I was getting sick of being cut out, but I understood. I did! They couldn't lie, couldn't break promises, and all of those things were great. Not being trusted with this big secret? It made me feel like I was still on the outside.

But Sunday, it all imploded.

In her attempt to grow bubble plants for everyone, Aspen overcompensated. So, when we met up for lunch, she passed a small plant to each of us, then admitted there were seventeen more on her shelves that needed to be put in the atrium. I immediately volunteered to help.

"Same place as the others?" Torian asked.

"They're happiest together," Aspen admitted.

He nodded. "Ok. I'll bring the spades."

Aspen squealed excitedly and hopped up to hug him. "I'll grow you something else too, ok?"

"Asp," he said, giving her a sweet little smile, "I get it. You said you'd do this, so now you have to."

Her face fell, but she shrugged it off. And yet, when we got the box full of baby Bursts down to the atrium, Torian was there with the promised tools and a smile. Keir and I took four of the plants. Hawke and Wilder grabbed a set for themselves, and Torian moved to help dig holes for his sister .

She pointed out the best areas for them, and we all got to work. Keir and I decided to put ours beside the bigger plant we liked so much, yet before we even got close, a rush of bubbles shot into the air.

Keir stuck out his tongue and tried to mimic the sputtering sound. "Is that our greeting, hm?" Then he leaned in and petted one of the leaves.

A pair of larger bubbles popped out, almost like the plant was trying to say it approved.

"I think it's been lonely," I said, moving closer to tap a spot on the ground. "How's this, Bubbles? Good spot for the babies?"

The plant released a whole cloud of bubbles, which I decided must be a yes.

So, crouching down, Keir and I began to dig little fist-sized holes.

I was patting down the dirt around the first one when I realized Torian and Aspen were bickering.

Worried, I looked back in time to see Aspen whisper something at him with pure rage on her face.

"Hey!" I barked, shooting to my feet and heading that way before my brain kicked in. "Aspen, you ok?"

"Worry about your own shit," Torian grumbled at me.

"Asp?" I asked again.

Aspen gave Torian a smug look. "See? I don't need you, Torian. I was doing fine before you brought me here, and yes, I do like it here, but I am not going to jump through hoops just because you say to!"

"You - " He stopped hard. "Rain, go away."

Instead, I planted my hands on my hips, ignoring the dirt on them. "No, that's not how this works. You don't get to run over her just because she's nice!"

"She's not nice ," he shot back. "She's fae! Aspen isn't meant to play human to keep you entertained, and she doesn't need to be wasting her time with planting flowers when she should be mastering her control!"

"I happen to like flowers!" Aspen snapped, slowly rising from where she'd knelt. "My mother was a gardener. Oh, but I'm supposed to ignore that because I have Winter magic. I'm supposed to despise spring because it's when my power weakens. Is that what you want, Torian? Because it's not what I do!"

"Aspen..." he tried to soothe.

"No!" she yelled. "You know what? I think a lot. I'm loud, I'm inconvenient, and I'm a complete fucking mess. I'm also nice! I'm fun, and I'm happy, and I can be anything I want to be. But the one thing I'm not?" She stepped right into her brother's face. "I am not scared."

"That's because you don't know what's out there!" he roared .

"Oh, I know," Aspen assured him. "I was right beside you when the Huntsman came at us." Then she stabbed her hand out, pointing at me. "And she was the one who stepped up." Her finger moved to Keir next. "And him!" Then over to Hawke and Wilder. "Them too. But where were you, Torian?"

"I was in front of you!" he hissed.

"You were pushing me down!" she yelled. "Always trying to make me be where and what you want. Well, guess what? We may be related, but that's it. Our goals are not the same. Our desires are not the same! "

Torian rocked back as if she'd just hit him. "That's not what I've been doing."

"Oh, you don't think I know all about your little fantasies?

You wanted my girlfriend simply because I did.

You tried to push Wilder away because we had something in common.

Now, you're tearing all of us apart with your attitude, because it's so serious.

Always fucking serious! When the fuck am I allowed to actually be happy, hm? When can I get to be myself?"

"You don't know what you're saying," he insisted.

"She doesn't?" I asked. "Why, because she's just some delicate and dainty little girl?" I scoffed at that. "Right, never mind that she's more powerful than you - and she isn't cracking!"

"She's why I'm cracking!" Torian growled.

"Tor..." Hawke said, catching my shoulder to pull me back. "She doesn't know everything."

"And that's my fucking point!" Torian said. "She keeps shoving her nose into things that are none of her business, pulling me and Aspen apart, and making us all feel like we have to pick sides!"

"Or you are," Wilder said.

Torian closed his eyes and pushed out a tense breath. "I did not tell you to pick a side."

"Kinda are," I countered. "Torian, we won! We pushed back the Hunt. We found the sign, so when they come back, it won't be just because of her, or Winter, or whatever the fuck Harper did."

"But they will!" he yelled. "You stupid human!

They will come for her again because they know she's here!

They're the Wild Hunt - and you don't even get what that means.

You think it's like a bad day, but they're so much more.

The Hunt is cursed to never stop. They do not rest, do not give up, and do nothing except chase the ones the crown has already convicted. "

"Yeah, all the fae on Earth," I shot back, proving I knew that much. "So none of you are safe. Got it. Kinda been dealing with it. The part I don't understand is why you're so fucking freaked out about everything Aspen wants to do!"

"He said Torian wasn't on his list," Keir pointed out. "So not all the fae on Earth."

"But she is on his list!" Torian snarled.

"Aspen is on his list, and you are so fucking ineffective, Rain, that you drained four of the strongest fae at Silver Oaks, and were still looking for more to use.

You throw magic around in the dumbest fucking ways, leaving us nothing to protect ourselves.

And you? Do you really think you're that important, Rain le Fae?

Are you so strong, or powerful, or capable that you can stop an unstoppable force? "

"I've stopped them so far!"

"You simply haven't died yet!"

Which was when Aspen shoved between us. "No.

You will not take this out on her. Your fight is with me, Torian, and you're just pissed because for once in my life, I want to make my own decisions.

Believe it or not, this isn't about you, or her, or anyone here.

This is about me deciding what I can live with, ok?

" She squealed in the back of her throat, clearly frustrated.

"I am not second to you! I am not your shadow, the main character, or any other bullshit line like that!

I am a person, ok? All I want to be is my own person, so just leave me the fuck alone! "

"Aspen," Torian breathed.

"Lay off, Tor," Wilder warned. "You're out of line."

"And you, of all people, know why this is important," Torian told him.

Wilder shrugged. "I also know why giving her space is just as important."

But Torian thrust out an arm at me. "She's the one doing this. She's tearing us apart because she doesn't have a fucking clue what's really going on."

"Then tell me!" I yelled.

" I can't! "

So I flapped my arms at my side. "But it's my fault, right? God forbid I try to respect Aspen's decisions, or wants, or even needs. You? You just walk all over her."

Torian made a noise like he wanted to rip my head off, and stormed closer. Keir moved to my side. Hawke lifted a hand, looking like he was begging Torian not to do this. Wilder moved around to check on Aspen, but Torian shoved right into my face.

Those eyes of his looked almost putrid in their color, and they were filled with so much anger. "You are here to find balance, Rain. Not to ruin everything. So you know, you're a shit Morrigan. History will remember you as a failure."

"Back. Off," Keir warned.

Torian just huffed. "Yeah. I see how it is."

"You kissed me," Keir said. "And just so you can't twist that around later?

Yeah, I liked it, and yeah, Rain said I should do it again.

" He shifted so his shoulder was in front of me, blocking Torian from doing anything stupid.

"And I don't care where you come from, people apologize when they fuck up, so we will be waiting.

And while you're at it, grow the fuck up. "

Torian looked back at Aspen. "Is that your problem, Aspen? You don't want to grow up? You want to be a child forever? Well, guess what? Even kids get destroyed if they aren't careful!"

"Do not threaten her!" I snapped, shoving him back.

"Be pissed at me. Yell at Keir. We don't care, but Aspen didn't ask for this shit.

We were trying to have a good day and you ruined it, Torian.

So you know, we can't all be frantic all the time.

We can't all be happiest when we're brooding and pissed off.

We aren't you, and we don't want to be like you.

We want to live, and love, and fight this shit because life is fucking worth living! "

"Tor, it's time to go," Hawke said.

Torian gave him a look of surprise. "Don't tell me you agree with them too?"

"I don't think they're wrong," Hawke said. "I don't think you are either, but this? It's not helping."

"She's tearing us apart," Torian warned.

"You are," Aspen said. "Rain has done nothing but help, but it's never enough for you. Nothing will ever be enough for you."

"Seeing you safe will be!" he shot back.

"Tor," Hawke said, pulling at him. "C'mon. Let it cool off a bit, ok? Let's just walk this out. You're pushing too hard at the truth."

Torian reached up to wipe at his mouth, but did let Hawke pull him away. For a little too long, we all stood there, silent, almost like we weren't sure what to do.

Then Wilder asked Aspen, "Are you ok?"

She nodded, then turned to kneel with her plants again. "I just wanted a good day. My birthday is next week, and..." She sniffed.

"Oh, Aspen," I breathed, rushing over to wrap my arm around her. "I'm sorry!"

"It's not you," she muttered. "I just want my brother to let me decide who I want to be. I mean, is that too much to ask?"

"It's why we all came to Earth," Keir said, leaning in so he could clasp her shoulder. "And this isn't something you have to deal with alone, ok? Whatever it is - "

"Even if you can't talk about it," I added.

Aspen just shook her head. "No, this really is my problem." Then she laughed once. "And the closer it gets to my birthday, the more he's going to push."

"Then he can stay away until he apologizes," Keir said. "I'll make sure of it, Aspen, because that's what partners do."

"And I'll back him up," Wilder agreed. "I think it's time Torian learns his place in the court isn't at the top."

"No," Aspen said, offering all of us a weak smile. "I think Rain's the one who belongs there."

"Morrigan!" Jack declared, proving he was somewhere in the trees above. Then he called out, "Court!"

"Fuck you, Jack," Aspen called back, but it was with a weak little laugh.

That made me believe she'd be ok - eventually.

But if her brother thought I was going to tear the court apart, I'd make sure I'd prove him wrong.

I even had a plan forming in the back of my mind.

I'd need a little help to pull it off, but Keir, Hawke, and Wilder had just proven they were exactly the men for the job.