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Chapter Fifty-Six

KEIR

A s we left the administration area, Wilder paused to check on Aspen. Hawke stopped with him. Torian didn't seem to care. For a guy who'd been so worried about his sister a moment ago, him not checking to make sure she was ok confused the hell out of me.

He was also pissed, so I jogged after him, convinced he was about to start some shit. Was that why the rest weren't following? Was this some alibi for them? Damn it, I might be considered a part of the court, but I was definitely at the outer edge of things. How the hell was I supposed to...

Torian spun on me, interrupting my thoughts. "Why are you following me?"

"Because we're suspended for the evening," I reminded him, "and I've agreed to make sure you don't break anything. That means re-shielding your room."

"Figured you'd be worried about your girlfriend," he taunted.

"Still not my girlfriend," I assured him. "We're just friends."

Torian slapped his hand on the call button for the elevator. "Bullshit."

"Rain is happy with the way things are," I told him, stepping in first when the door opened.

Torian glared at me, but followed. "I don't need a babysitter."

"I happen to disagree."

The kid fucking growled in the back of his throat like an animal.

The sound was the sort of rage I couldn't even imagine, and right now, Torian was filled with it.

When he slammed his hand against the button for the fourth floor, I didn't say a thing.

Instead, I moved to the back of the car, giving him plenty of space.

The ride up was silent, but when the doors opened on our floor, Torian said, "How are you supposed to find the damned token if you're babysitting me?"

Then he just stormed toward his room. Letting out a tense breath, I shook my head, then followed, giving him a bit of space.

I could feel the static in the air as his power gathered, which made me think he was either holding things in more than I could guess, or slipping worse than we'd thought. I just wished he'd give me a hint!

A flick of his hand unlocked his door. Torian entered his own room, but left the thing open behind him, almost like an invitation. Deciding I might as well make sure his room was completely protected, I braced for another one of his tantrums, then followed him in.

The space was clean. In truth, immaculate was a better word.

At first glance, it all seemed normal, but then my eyes landed on the bookshelves that did not face the bathroom.

There, Peter Pan, Dr. Seuss, and other classic children's books were carefully stored.

Each one was a hardcover. All of them were completely pristine.

The wall I could see from my side had textbooks and folders. The sort of thing typical for a teenager's dorm. There was a photo of him with his sister that looked like it had been taken here, outside somewhere. The smiles on their faces did not match Torian's expression now.

"Well?" he snapped. "Get to it, Keir!"

"Yeah," I muttered, imagining his room completely sealed off to all magic.

With a push, I sent a bubble of iridescent colors out to mesh with the walls of his room.

The whole thing would be easy for a person to pass through, but not magic.

No conjurations, enchantments, or even glamours would be able to pass this shield.

Yet as the magic hit the doorway to the bathroom, it crackled, sending up a green flare.

"Don't fuck up the gate, you dumbass!" he snarled.

So I pulled the shield back a bit, leaving millimeters of space between them.

His gate would still work, but the kid's tone?

It grated on my last nerve. Still, I was working, so I pushed my annoyance away, checking each nook and cranny in here to verify Torian's temper was completely secure.

Then I released it all, trusting that my magic would hold .

"Ok, it's..." My words trailed off as my eyes landed on Torian in the process of pulling off his uniform.

Kid - that was what I'd been calling him, yet I'd been so wrong.

As the fabric slipped over his head, my eyes landed on broad muscles that did not come from years of magical exercises.

Torian's shoulders were like cables. His biceps rippled.

All of that made it into my brain, yet my eyes hung on the last thing I'd ever expected.

His back.

His skin wasn't smooth like the fae, nor was it covered in zits like most human teens. Instead, there were long welts standing up. The skin over them was thick and redder than his tawny color. The irregular shape of them proved these were scars, and deep ones from the way they'd healed.

"Your..." I took a half step towards him. "Torian, what happened?"

He paused, his entire body tensing, and then he spun to face me. "Out!"

"What happened to your back?" I demanded. "Torian, I can heal that."

"That?" he asked, snatching a shirt from the end of his bed and shoving his arms into it. "No one can heal that, and it's a reminder. Your precious queen left that on me."

"You saw the Mad Queen?" I asked.

"She fucking trained me!" he hissed. "And do you know what happens to little boys who can't hold their control?

" He shoved his head into his shirt and yanked it over his chest. "Each mistake earned a lash.

Oh, and it was a beautiful scepter that she used.

Gold and pearl, with eltam inlays. I'm sure you've seen it in history books, Keir.

She was coronated with it. A crown on her head and a scepter in her hands which she used like a fucking weapon ! "

"That's how you learned magic?" I asked.

"Do not feel sorry for me!" he snapped, storming at me.

"I know more magic than anyone here. I know the rules, the limitations, and exactly how to get around all of them.

That woman made me powerful. She made me dangerous.

She turned me into her damned weapon - and I will not let the same happen to my sister! "

He spit out the last as he hit me, a hand on each shoulder to shove me back. "You did your good deed. Pat your back and text your girl. Just leave me the fuck alone!"

I rolled with the first hit, but when he shoved a second time, I grabbed his arms and turned, pushing him away. "Is that what you need?" I asked. "Want to hurt someone? Will it make you feel better, or will you just feel like her? "

"I am nothing like her!" he roared, grabbing a handful of the palest white magic I'd ever seen. "This? She cannot do this!"

"The season doesn't matter if you use it for pain." I lifted my chin, but didn't throw up a shield.

Torian's entire body was trembling with his anger - or desperation. I wasn't sure which anymore. His knuckles were pale from the pressure, but the glow inside his hand was illuminating his skin. The shirt he'd pulled on fit well, reminding me this guy was not the young and ignorant boy I'd assumed.

No, I was pretty sure he was a killer. Maybe against his will, but he'd said the Queen had made him into a weapon, and the way he wielded magic?

Suddenly so many things about him made sense.

His rage was from pain. The same kind Fin had carried.

Combined with magic, it was a dangerous thing, pushing the user to get their share back, take what they wanted, and consider it what was owed to them, even if it left more victims in their wake.

"What do you want from me?" I asked, keeping my voice calm.

"I want you to go out there, find the damned signal that keeps bringing the Hunt, and stop it!

" He slung his hand down, dissolving the light with the motion.

"I want, Keir, for the jesters to just leave us alone.

I want the sidhe to work together, for the Morrigan to stop acting like she hates me, and. .."

I pressed into his space. "Have a tantrum."

"Fuck you."

So I lifted a hand and nudged his chest just hard enough to be annoying. "That's what you want, isn't it? You want to make someone hurt?"

"Fuck. You!"

The next time, I shoved.

Torian grabbed my hand and spun my back into the wall, but he was slow and out of practice.

The moment he thought he had me pinned, I ducked, twisted, and shifted his hold.

A push on one shoulder made him turn the other way until I could slam his back against the wall. A hand on his throat held him there.

"You are not dangerous," I grumbled. "You're pissed. You're distracted, and you aren't a damned monster."

"Oh, that's where you're wrong," he assured me. "I'm the most terrifying thing in two worlds."

I scoffed. "Big ego for a little boy."

"I am not a boy!" he growled, shoving at me again .

So I shoved back, but down, forcing him to a knee, but only one hit the ground. There, standing over him, I hooked a finger under Torian's chin and tilted his head up as I leaned right up in his face.

"You may be pretty, Torian, but this is not - "

He surged upwards, but instead of shoving me back, his mouth found mine, and the guy kissed me hard. My hands tried to push him off, but he deflected, finally blocking me. And somewhere in the scramble of pushing and smacking, I stopped fighting.

I pushed in, parting my mouth.

Torian's hand found my shirt, then gripped the fabric in a fist. The other clung to my bicep as his tongue slipped between my teeth to tangle with my own. My fingers tightened on his neck, preventing him from taking anything from me I didn't want to give, but a kiss?

Oh, I would kiss the shit out of him if it would stop this fucking spiral. One step pushed my chest against his, trapping his arm between us. I felt when his back hit the wall. Torian sucked in a breath and his eyes jumped open, but I did not let up. I kissed him like the man he wanted to be.

The hand I had on his neck tilted his face up.

My other tangled in his hair, pulling his mouth to mine.

Damn, he was beautiful, but guys like him never wanted anything to do with me.

They wanted pretty, and I was not that. They wanted gentle, and I'd never polished my rough edges.

They wanted elegant, and I enjoyed being as coarse as the humans I adored.

So I gave him all my imperfections, waiting for the hesitation that would say he was done.

Instead, something in him let go. Between one pass of our mouths and the next, the monster in my hands stopped fighting.

I heard his voice wrap around a breath. It wasn't quite a moan, but when I leaned my hips against his, I got one.

"Torian..." I whispered against his mouth.

Slowly, he pulled back, those spring-green eyes of his searching my features, but he didn't say a thing.

"You're supposed to be pissed at me," I reminded him.

Finger by finger, he worked his hand free of my shirt just to reach up and touch his lower lip. "I like girls," he muttered.

"Me too." I had to choke back a laugh. "And you're cute, Torian, but - "

"Tor," he said, flicking his eyes up to meet mine again. "My friends call me that."

"You said I couldn't."

"That was then." An almost confused smile flickered across his face. "I'm still a monster, Keir."

I just shrugged that off. "A certain girl I know reminded me that merely makes you fae. Kinda the only thing that matters, right?"

"A fae monster," he said, "is still a monster."

I nodded, making it clear I'd heard him. "Yeah, and also a person. I keep telling you, we're on the same side."

"Which side is that?"

I lifted my hand to caress his cheek. My thumb trailed over those perfect cheekbones of his. "I should probably say Aspen's, but I'm starting to think it's really Rain's side."

"Yeah," he breathed, dropping his head just to press it into my chest. "That's the right side." And then his shoulders trembled. "Keir? Don't let me break."

"You got this," I assured him.

"But that's the thing." He pulled in a deep breath. "I don't. I really fucking don't, but someone has to."

"Then we've got this," I said. "And if kissing me helps, feel free to do it all you want."

He swallowed so hard I heard him, then pulled back so he could see me again. "She doesn't know about the scars."

"Aspen?"

He shook his head. "Rain."

"Tell her when you're ready." And I let him go. "Tor, should we talk about this?"

His lips curled at the shortened version of his name, but he shook his head. "No. I'm fine, Keir. I just needed to get out of my own head for a moment."

"Ok." I stepped back. "So you know, I expected you to hit me."

"Yeah, I did too."

I turned for my room, deciding I needed to rethink everything. Torian Hunt was not a kid. He also wasn't a monster. He might be a weapon, but I was pretty sure I'd just seen a side of him no one else ever had. Maybe not even his sister. The real question was what I should do with all of this.

For now, I decided, I'd do nothing. And yet, the taste of him lingered on my tongue.