Page 22 of Let the Game Begin (Kiss Me Like You Love Me #1)

“Wait,” I whispered, my eyes drilling into hers. “I think we should have a redo,” I told her. I knew that she’d think I was insane, but I didn’t give a shit. I needed her. If I just fucked her one more time, maybe I could stop imagining how her face would look as she climaxed beneath me.

“What?” she asked incredulously. She clearly wasn’t expecting me to make that kind of proposition to her.

“I want you, Selene. I may seem like a lunatic to you, but that’s the way I am.

I always say what I’m thinking, especially to women.

I’ll say it again: I want you,” I told her, never taking my eyes off hers.

In that moment, she looked smaller, more afraid and more confused than ever, and I got the feeling that we occupied two different universes, light-years apart. Still, I didn’t retract my suggestion.

“God, Neil,” she sighed, running a hand through her hair. She sat back against the seat, and I released her wrist so I wouldn’t hurt her.

“I have to sort things out with Jared. And besides, I’m Matt’s daughter… I’m… I…” she stammered, confused and torn between her guilt and her desire. I imagined her walking a slender tightrope, balanced precariously between the world of perdition—my world—and her world, an illusion of perfection.

“You lost your virginity to me, and you don’t even remember it. I just wanted to give you the opportunity to make up for it, because I get that your first time was a big deal for you,” I said softly, trying to sound convincing. Still, she resisted me, shaking her head.

“Are you trying to do me a favor?” She laughed hysterically, like the entire situation was totally surreal to her.

“No, I’d just like to give you another shot,” I admitted, staring into her eyes.

I wanted to stop thinking about her in such a sick way—I’d even conjured her up when I was with Jennifer, for Christ’s sake.

I was certain that us having sex again would put an end to my torment and her feelings of guilt.

We could sleep together one more time, and it would fix everything.

Both of us could go on with our lives without ever again thinking about what had happened between us.

“You’re insane! Truly nuts! I’m going to class.” Selene started to open the door, but I reached out and pulled it shut. We weren’t finished yet. I and I alone was the one who decided when my games began and when they ended.

“We’ve kissed already, and you’ve slept with me.

What’s the point of fighting something that you want just as much as I do?

” My face was very close to her. The smell of coconut was drugging; it shocked me.

I wanted to kiss her in a way I’d never wanted to kiss anyone before.

Typically, I kissed women to disarm them so I could fuck them, not because I actually wanted to kiss for its own sake.

“I’m not promising you a love story out of a movie or a book. I’m just offering you the opportunity to use me to jog your memory.”

Selene stared at me like I’d lost my mind.

“ Use you?” she echoed, horrified. “I don’t use people, Neil.” She didn’t understand me. No one could, least of all her. I sighed in exasperation, but I didn’t lose my patience, which was unusual for me.

“At least think about it.” I pulled back and dug in my jeans for my pack of Winstons.

“About getting fucked by you?” She grinned sarcastically before muttering incomprehensibly under her breath.

“We can make love, if you want…” I suggested. Selene burst out laughing—it seemed that she couldn’t believe her ears.

“How do you make love to someone without loving them?” she asked reflectively. Her attitude was making my head hurt. I was tired of constantly coming up with new forms of persuasion.

“You’re sharp,” I told her. I brought a cigarette to my lips and lit it, buying myself some time.

“You’re screwing with me, aren’t you?” she asked indignantly. She pinched the bridge of her nose with two fingers like I was causing a nervous breakdown.

“Perceptive, too.” I exhaled my smoke into her face and she squinted, coughing.

“I’m out of here. I don’t waste my time with assholes,” she spat out irritably. She climbed out of the car furiously and gave the door an aggressive slam for good measure.

“Have a great day, Tinkerbell,” I said, waving at her from the half-open window. She didn’t respond, except to lift her middle finger at me. I watched her firm, beautiful ass walk away and found myself thinking that she really was a fairy creature.

Just adorable.

But Babygirl had already lost me too much time.

I ran a hand through my hair as I walked across campus toward the art building, trying not to notice the furtive glances some of the other students gave me. Some of them were attracted to me; others were afraid of me and just wanted to stay out of my way. All of them knew my reputation.

“Look who finally showed up.” Jennifer appeared alongside me with a frosty look and an irritated tone.

“Hey, Blondie.” I stopped to loom over her, touching her cheek and giving her one of my winning smiles.

Though I felt no regret about how I’d treated her in my room and would never apologize to her, I still needed to at least pretend to be sorry, if only to maintain the harmony of our friend group.

I hated fighting with Jennifer or Alexia in particular because, like all women, they tended to hold grudges and dragged out disagreements forever.

“Oh, now you wanna acknowledge me,” she answered stiffly.

I wasn’t sure if she was actually still angry, but what I did know was that Jennifer loved to be on the receiving end of my attention.

They were suffocating—her jealousy and her habitual pushiness.

She wanted to know who I was seeing, who I was talking to, who I was going out with.

This behavior of hers often reminded me of Scarlett, and I wondered if I was the common denominator, driving women to new levels of crazy.

Scarlett…

Every time I thought about her, anguish bled into me like a poison.

“Are you bringing your stepsister to school now, too? How cute.” Jennifer’s mocking voice shook me from my reverie. My first class started in less than ten minutes.

“Get off my back,” I snapped, annoyed. “I do what I want with whoever I want.”

I walked away from her, feeling in my pockets for my package of Winstons. I could never tell Jennifer about what happened with Selene, otherwise Babygirl would become a target like every other person I slept with. I’d already said too much when I told her Selene was Matt’s daughter.

“You never turn me down,” Jennifer said as she followed along behind me, intending to continue the argument. She was right. I never turned her down, and I certainly never turned down her top-notch oral skills. Blondie really knew how to work her tongue.

“There’s a first time for everything.” I lit up a cigarette and continued walking briskly, listening to her hastening footfalls behind me. I smiled in satisfaction at the thought of her having to chase me. It always pleased me to know that I was pushing her buttons.

“Bullshit, you—”

I didn’t let her get any further. I turned abruptly and grabbed her by one of the French braids along the side of her head. Then I used it to tug her face up until it was barely an inch from mine, staring into her eyes. Jennifer held her breath and swallowed hard, alarmed by my vehemence.

“Don’t make me angry, Jen,” I hissed furiously.

I could feel the stares of the students all around us but no one seemed surprised by the pathetic scene, nor did anyone attempt to intervene.

Jennifer grimaced in pain but said nothing, aware that she was on thin ice.

“Just shut the fuck up, and quit busting my balls.” I released her, letting her stagger back and then walked away.

There were limits with me that couldn’t be pushed. It was dangerous, because beyond those limits lay the territory of the beast.