Page 110 of Let the Game Begin (Kiss Me Like You Love Me #1)

“Are you sure? But you will come back, right?” Logan asked, sounding concerned as he searched my eyes. I nodded at the first question and didn’t answer the second. I worried my upper lip and smiled, trying to defuse some of the tension. I didn’t want to talk about it, so I changed the subject.

“Okay, then, so how about we watch a movie?” I suggested and the other two agreed.

***

We watched an extremely sad two-hour film. At one point, Logan fell asleep. Alyssa cried her eyes out at the ending, while I inhaled an entire bag of high-calorie chips that would probably go straight to my hips.

When Logan opened his eyes and Alyssa leaned into him, looking for cuddles and attention, I wished them both goodnight. Matt and Mia wouldn’t be home until later, so I decided to creep up to my room to give the pair a little privacy.

I took a hot bath to a soundtrack of “The Scientist” by Coldplay, my favorite band.

Then I got into my oversized tiger-print pajamas.

I slid my feet into fluffy slippers and flopped down on the bed, opening my MacBook.

I reflected on how much I truly enjoyed my solitude.

Unlike many other people, I’d never experienced it as a negative—far from it.

Being on my own gave me time to get back in touch with myself and think about my choices, weighing what was right or wrong for me.

The silence became meditative—a total peace that calmed my nerves and allowed me to relax.

Just then, my phone vibrated with an incoming text message alert. I jolted at the sudden buzzing sound and grabbed the phone with an annoyed exhalation.

You look bored…

I sat up and crossed my legs underneath me as I read the message, sent to me by an unknown number. I glanced around fearfully. Was someone spying on me?

Another message came in, drawing my attention.

Those awful pajamas again…

Now that message… That could not have been from anyone other than…

I lifted my head and instinctively looked at the glass doors that accessed the balcony, the only place someone could possibly be looking in on me and I saw…Neil. I saw him in all his cursed beauty, leaning on the balcony’s railing with a lit cigarette hanging from his lips.

What was he doing out there?

How was he not freezing cold?

Neil was now wearing another sweater and a pair of jeans that emphasized his tall, muscular form. It couldn’t be enough to keep him warm. He bent his head over his phone and tapped out something.

We have adjoining balconies.

It was strange to be texting when we were within just a few feet of each other, but then Neil and I had never been exactly “normal” together.

Wait a second…

How did you get my number?

The answer came shortly: I might have taken it from Logan

“Taken,” of course, not asked for.

I lifted my face and looked in his direction, beyond the large glass barrier, but he had vanished. Where the hell was he now?

I frowned and slid over the edge of the bed, leaving behind my laptop, because all of my attention was now fixed on the messy scene playing out on the balcony.

My phone vibrated again in my hands and my heart leaped.

Do you want to…talk?

I reread the question three times, and I still wasn’t sure whether he was sincere or just messing with me.

Either way, I needed to answer him. I could give in and say yes right away, or I could say no and forever deprive myself of the potential opportunity to communicate with him. Finally, I just typed: Why?

I looked out at the balcony again, hoping he might reappear. But he wasn’t there, and he probably wasn’t coming back, either.

My phone buzzed again.

Because today I told the Boy that there is a star in the sky for each of us, far enough away that our mistakes cannot tarnish it, and he seemed to agree. He would like to find it with you.

My heart throbbed as I read his response, so odd and profound.

I looked up at the glass doors and suddenly, Neil was there. He gave me a small smile, and just then, it felt like I had an entire colony of butterflies flying around inside my chest. I understood it then…

We weren’t nothing. We were something that could be seen, sensed, felt, something that did exist but knew no meanings or definitions.

There was no explanation for the likes of us.

I accept.

After typing out my answer, I lifted my chin to look at him and noticed an odd detail.

Neil had a marker in his hand. He hesitated for a few moments and then rested the tip of the marker against the glass and drew a medium-sized star there.

The lines were so perfectly symmetrical, I was enchanted by them.

Neil really did have gifted hands and not just when it came to pleasuring a woman.

I approached the door slowly, meeting his eyes through the glass and then opened it. The cold air mingled with the heat of the room.

“You really are a disaster,” I noted, looking at his sinfully appealing body.

He smiled and walked into my room without asking for permission.

A wave of his pleasing scent washed over me.

I immediately shut the door behind him and just watched as he wandered around my room, scrutinizing everything curiously.

He dragged his fingers along one edge of my desk, and I could guess what he was thinking about. He’d once taken me violently on that desk, showing me all his uncontrollable carnal desire.

“You’re here to talk.” My weak voice cut through the uncomfortable silence that hung over the room, and he turned to look at me, paying special attention to my pajamas. I didn’t care if he thought they were childish; I wasn’t going to change for him or anyone else.

“You’ll have to take your clothes off,” he murmured, sounding intrigued but quite serious, and I shook my head.

It was no use trying to get anything out of him. All he did was tease me until he’d gotten what he wanted. Again, I felt dumb and deluded.

“Goodnight, Neil.” I sat down on the edge of my bed and grabbed my computer, settling it on my lap.

“You’ll have to take your clothes off.…” he repeated and a muscle in my cheek twitched angrily.

“Because I’ll be waiting for you at the indoor pool, and you’ll need to wear a swimsuit,” he continued with a dictatorial scowl, so I would understand just how silly I’d been to mistrust him before I’d even let him finish.

I lifted my face to meet his eyes, but he had already turned and headed for the door.

I saw the marker tucked into the back pocket of his dark jeans.

I didn’t move for a few moments, staring at the hallway his frame had vanished into. I blinked as if to make sure I hadn’t imagined all of it, and then got quickly off the bed, shaking myself out of my trance.

Before I left my room, I put on a black one-piece with a bit of a revealing neckline.

It was sexy but not vulgar, because I wanted him to want me but I didn’t want to be as flashy as the women who typically surrounded him.

I also brushed my teeth, let my hair down to fall past my shoulders, and even did a quick check to make sure I was shaved and presentable.

Then, I took the elevator up to the third floor to meet him.

My legs trembled with every inch closer I got to him, and when the elevator doors opened and signaled my arrival, I had to be careful I didn’t fall down. Strong emotions swirled in my gut like planets orbiting a sun.

I went to the pool and immediately spotted Neil floating in the water.

His upturned face was wet, his eyes closed as water dripped from their long lashes.

His pectorals were especially prominent as his arms stretched out wide on either side of him.

His full lips were curled into an insolent smirk, and his skin gleamed.

“Took you long enough, Tinkerbell,” he commented, opening his eyes to fix his golden gaze on me.

I glanced around and noticed the soft, white deck chairs scattered around the pool.

I peeled off my bathrobe and put it on one of them next to his things: the pack of Winstons, his phone, and the marker from before. Neil was eclectic to say the least.

I cleared my throat as I watched his gaze travel along my curves. I approached him in my bare feet, and choosing not to dive in, I sat down on the marble edge of the pool and dunked my legs just up to my knees. The water was pleasantly warm.

“What, don’t trust me?” he teased, swimming to meet me with elegant, feline motions. His lips broke the crystalline water line while his eyes remained above the surface. His chestnut hair hung down damply over the back of his neck. The toki stood out on his powerful bicep, begging me to touch it.

“Not enough. Remember: we’re here to talk,” I answered honestly, because I really couldn’t share too small a space with Neil without giving in to the temptation of his kisses.

I needed to shift my attention to something other than his body. I could feel my cheeks getting hot, and I was pretty sure it wasn’t because of the water.

“Bukowski’s your favorite writer,” I began with what felt like a good jumping-off topic.

Neil paused just a short distance from me and ran his hands through his wet hair. He licked his lips and they almost certainly tasted like chlorine and him —a combination I longed to experience.

“And you went through my stuff without permission,” he answered, irritated. But he remained a safe distance away from me, for which I was eternally grateful.

“So…you like to read?” I pushed onwards because, goddammit, I needed a win.

Neil snorted and moved closer to me, which set off my invisible alarm. I imagined a tiny red light blinking inside me.

“There’s a bluebird in my heart that wants to get out,but I’m too tough for him, I say, stay in there, I’m not going to let anybody see,” he answered with a Bukowski quote, staring at my legs and floating over in front of me.

Too close. I shifted uncertainly on the marble and tried to refocus on why I’d followed him here.