Page 151 of Hate You Up Close

He didn't even have the decency to say goodbye.

I stand on my feet, crying out Elliot’s name until he slams the door and shuts me out.

I’ve never felt so heartbroken and embarrassed in my entire life. Everett’s brows pinch together in sadness as he turns his gaze to me.

“Roxy…” he exhales. “I’m so sorry…But I’d rather get him home before he starts spewing off shit he doesn't mean. It’s clear that he loves you…and I’m not going to stand here and watch him fuck it up. He’s drunk, his emotions are out of control, and he needs to sleep this off. It would probably be for the best if you two just talked tomorrow when he’s sober and in a clear headspace.”

I swallow the lump in my throat and force out a nod.

“I-I understand,” I croak, my voice almost inaudible as uncontrollable tears stream down my face.

“Let me give you a ride home too,” he rasps. “Just…get in the back seat. I’ll take you home first.”

I shake my head.

“N-No,” I exhale shakily. “I’ll just go back into the bar and request an Uber.”

“That’s ridiculous,” he retorts. “Just let me give you a ride.”

“No,” I repeat firmly. “I want…I need to be alone right now. And apparently, so does Elliot. I’ll just call an Uber. I only live a few blocks away.”

Everett’s gaze bounces between mine as if he’s trying to read my mind.

“Are you sure?” he asks quietly. “I really don’t mind. As a matter of fact, I would prefer to drive you home.”

“I’m sure,” I nod.

He pauses, staring at me with a sorrowful gaze for what feels like forever until he finally purses his lips together and nods.

“Okay,” he replies hesitantly.

He takes a deep breath before continuing.

“He’s going to come around, Roxy,” he adds. “I promise you he will. I just met you tonight, but I can already tell that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him. Just…please don’t give up on him.”

“I won’t,” I reply with a weak smile. My emotions betray me as tears continue to stream like a river down my cheeks.

I don’t think I could, even if I wanted to.

After we say our goodbyes, Everett heads for the car and waits to drive off until I retreat into the bar.

The tears never stop flowing. I cry the entire way home in the Uber. I cry in the shower. I throw up in the shower. I curl up in bed and cry into Spooky’s furry body. And then I cry myself to sleep.

I dream of a world where Elliot can let go of his demons. I dream of a world where he allows me to love him and lets himself love me back.

I dream of a man who feels like home. A home that I always yearned for but never had.

THIRTY

Elliot

One Week Later

I’m sitting on my couch, staring down at my phone. I received a voicemail from Roxanne two days ago, and for some reason, I just can’t bring myself to listen to it.

Roxanne has texted and called me multiple times, all of which I’ve avoided. The last text I read from her said, “Evie told me that you may be out of the office for a while. I’ve canceled your meetings, and I’m handling everything that I can while you’re out. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need anything. I love you, and I’m here when you’re ready to talk.”

Just like she promised, she hasn't given up on me. Even after how shitty I’ve been to her, she tries to call or text me at least once a day. I thought she would have never forgiven me for leaving her broken and crying in the alley behind Cellar 23. But it’s clear that she already has.