Page 36 of Hate So Deep (Hate #4)
THEN
Lauren
The days bleed into each other while I slowly shrink into a version of myself that I don’t recognize.
My family continues to disintegrate before my eyes and there's nothing that I can do but watch the action from the sidelines.
Dirk’s cruel words follow me and while I get his anger at my omission, I don’t think he understood my true motivation.
This had nothing to do with Colt, beyond trying to forget but somehow my need to get closer to the rough and tumble guy who made my heart sing became a dirty game to bring my half-brother down.
It was not true but what could I possibly say? I was the one who didn’t introduce myself from the start and I can only imagine how it looked considering Buck’s nonstop quest to bring Colt down.
It’s a moot point now but after another brutal fight between my brothers in which no one has bothered to explain what happened, I find myself sitting outside the bookstore across town.
Buck came home from the hospital broken and bloodied. Meanwhile, Dad performed his perfunctory duties before claiming work and rushing out of the house.
What makes them so special?
I guess I’m about to find out because I didn’t follow him across town for nothing.
After exiting the car, I slam the door shut and round the hood before a deep, raspy voice says behind me, “I wouldn't do that if I were you.”
When I glance back, Dirk raises a brow. What the fuck is he doing here?
“Yeah,” I snarl, “well I’m not you.”
My veins seethe with emotion that I no longer have a desire to hold in. I've had enough and I'm about to expose their sordid little world.
Before I can take a single step though, Dirk grabs my arm and backs me toward the car, saying, “Get your pretty little ass in your car and go.”
“Fuck off,” I breathe, sucking in a breath when my heaving chest brushes his.
His chuckle sends a zing straight to my core as he pins me to the car and says, “For such a good girl, you sure swear like a fucking sailor.”
“I’m not a good girl,” I say automatically, and his eyes light with fire.
“Good to know,” he rasps, his gaze dropping to my heaving chest. “But baby girl, you don’t want to do this. It won’t end well. Not with Colt.”
“Colt? My father–”
“I know,” he says, cocking his head. “Let it be. There’s nothing you can do.”
Tears clog my throat, and I shake my head. There’s nothing I can do, as though I’m meaningless. I guess I am because he ran off and created a new family.
Dad left me behind.
“I can tell her to go fuck herself,” I whisper, and Dirk brushes a strand of hair behind my ear.
When I look up, his brows furrow before he leans in so close I can feel his breath against my lips.
My heart jumps into my throat at that and I stare, frozen while he hovers.
His eyes drop to my mouth, and I lick my lips, arching the tiniest bit when he groans, and the low rumble causes his chest to brush mine once more.
My skin tingles at the contact. The world around us halts, time suspended as we stare at each other before he steps back and says, “Go.”
“No,” I whisper.
“No?” he growls, his brows slamming over his eyes. Grabbing my arm, he opens the door and pushes me inside as he says, “Get the fuck out of here.”
“Hey,” I gasp, pulling from his grasp. “Don’t fucking touch me.”
Raising his hands, he barks, “No problem. Now, be a good girl and go.”
For a moment, I just stare before my lower lip trembles, and I suck back a surge of tears. Damn him.
“Jesus, Lauren,” he says, rubbing his hand over his jaw before bowing his head.
Why is he upset? This isn’t about him.
“This is your last warning,” he mutters, raising his icy cold eyes to mine. “Colt and his sister don’t need your shit. Leave them be.”
Wow. Just fucking wow…
“Right,” I say, batting at the tears that spill over my lids.
Refusing to look at him, I pull the door closed as I sneer, “Colt and his sister…”
After that, I put the car in gear and peel away from the curb with a squeal of my tires.
Fuck him. Fuck them all.
That’s what I thought then, so why am I leaving my fate in Dirk’s hands now?