Page 80 of Forever My Siren Luna
His eyes shone brightly, his Lycan pressing forward more than before. Jack winced, making me wonder what his beast is telling him.
“Jack,” I sighed, shaking my head. “You are my brother. You may not think so, but to me that is what you will always be. Even if I didn’t accept Lachlan in the future, I wouldn’t choose you. I wouldn’t choose anyone. It’s him or no one for me. Always. I can see the way you look at Beretta, and I know she looks at you the same way. If your heart is open to another, it should be her.”
“Damn right,”Val growls, “I only want Killian brushing my hair.”
I smiled in agreement.
“If you can’t work with us anymore because of me, I will try to understand, but I won’t lie to you. Lachlan is my mate. You are my captain and my friend. Those two facts will never change.”
Twenty-Four
Jack
“I told you not to ask,”my beast hissed at me, worried about the fragile peace I already have between myself and this pack. He did tell me to drop it, but I had to get it out. I had to try one last time, or I would regret it.
At least I thought I would. I feel a different kind of regret now, though I don't know how to interpret it. I don't think I'm ready to. What I'm ready for is a drink. I need to wet my lips desperately now.
I reassured Ela that I was still more than willing to take on the task of going to defeat her uncle. I want him dead too much to let my wounded ego deter that. It’s personal for both Ela and myself, just like it is for most of my crew. All our lives would be different if not for that bastard Wayne. I would be every bit an alpha on land as I am at sea if it weren’t for him, with my mate by my side, not having to face the constant torture of guilt and shame, and the ache of loss.
Wandering back towards the beach, alone, since Ela left me in that barracks corridor to return to her mate, I was lost in my thoughts and self-pity and didn’t notice the alluring scent approaching until it was right upon me, making me whip around to come face to face with the raven haired beauty that had been tormenting me ever so much for weeks now.
Instead of the sultry gaze I'm getting used to, Beretta’s expression is hard as stone now, like I have never seen before. It sets me back, not expecting her to look so cold.
“Did you do it? Did you get it out of your system?” She asked in a harsh tone.
Oisin growled softly in my head, annoyed at me for making Beretta angry or annoyed at the blatant disrespect she has been showing me endlessly as of late. I can't tell which.
“Did I do what?” I sighed, reaching for the flask in my vest pocket, no longer feeling the shame of drinking from it like I would back at the training grounds or in front of Ela and her mate, since Beretta never cared about my drinking before. This pack is the only place I have felt shame from wetting my lips. That damned Alpha Lachlan with his arrogant stare always zeroed in on my movements when I reached for my pocket. He should understand guilt just as much as I do. His mate was tortured the same as mine because of his misjudgments. What right does he have to judge me?
As I’m lifting the flask to my lips, Beretta snatched it from my grip, then tossed it at least 20 meters down the beach, the lid still off so all the amber contents begin spilling out of the top when it lands upside down in the sand.
“Hey!” I snarled, the itch in the back of my throat growing more irritating with my thirst and annoyance.
“Don’t hey me, you shit for brains. Answer me, damn it. Did you get your feelings toward the princess dealt with at last? Did you overcome your pathetic attempt to try to steal her?”
“Watch it, lass,” I growled dangerously low, “I let you get away with most disrespect, considering it’s you, but you have been crossing too many lines as of late. I am still your captain.”
She scoffed, shaking her head, looking out at the bay towards my ships. She bit her lip, and the sudden glittering moisture in her fiery eyes made my heart clench. Oisin is whimpering, like seeing her frustrated unshed tears.
“My captain, huh?” She gently shook her head. “I guess that’s all you really ever wanted to be to me. Just my captain. My damn selfish captain.”
Oisin growled, and this time I know his anger is aimed at me for making her this upset.
His affection and interest in Ela has waned over the past weeks, seeing Ela’s undeniable connection to an Alpha that deep down we know is stronger than us. He is a more perfect match for her than me. I can see that now.
Oisin has been paying more close attention to Beretta when she was around, and his focus is totally on her now, his feelings bleeding into mine, making me feel heart wrenching guilt.
In all honesty, it didn’t hurt as badly as I thought it would to be completely refused the way I was by Ela.
It hurt nothing like I hurt right now, seeing Beretta’s pain.
“I…. Beretta, I-”
“Save it,Captain,” she snapped, looking up like she was refusing to let the tears fall in front of me. “I’m done chasing you. I’m starting to feel a bit pathetic too.”
She turns and walks away, leaving me alone once again, stunned and completely crushed by her words.
Crushed barely begins to describe the feeling I have in my chest, watching her walk away.