Page 134 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 10

Saturday

Penny needed time to think through things. And that was fine. I’d give her time. As much time as she needed. A few hours, days, weeks. It didn’t matter. Because we were meant to be. I’d waited this long for happiness. I could wait a little longer if that’s what she needed.

I felt eerily calm as I grabbed my phone and hit Rob’s name.

The phone rang a few times and then Rob answered. “What’s up?” he asked.

What did he mean, “What’s up?” He’d told me he’d be visiting but never told me when. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. It didn’t matter. I was excited to see him whenever he got here. “I’m just checking in. Are you back in the states yet?”

“You sound weird. What’s wrong?”

I laughed. “Nothing.”

There was a long paused. “Are you dying or something?”

“What? No.”

“Well, good. But you still sound strange. You’re sure everything is good?”

I was pretty sure I was just…happy. And I felt bad that Rob couldn’t even recognize me with that emotion.

I hoped Penny would be back in my arms by the time Rob visited.

I wanted him to know that I was good. That he didn’t have to worry about me so much anymore.

“Yeah, everything is good. I’ll have a surprise for you when you get here. ” He was going to love Penny.

“Oooh what kind of surprise?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“Can I get a hint?” he asked.

“No, that kind of defeats the purpose of a surprise.”

“Boo you whore.”

I laughed. “I know you mean that lovingly.”

“Unless you’re suddenly whoring around town with all the hot, single co-eds.”

I definitely wouldn’t word dating Penny that way. “No.”

“Boo…”

“Don’t call me a whore again.”

Rob laughed.

“So,” I said. “When are you coming?”

“I figured that’s why you were calling. Tell Ellen I’ll be there by next weekend at the latest.”

“And why am I telling Ellen?”

“Because I want her to make me all my favorites. Tell her exactly that. She’ll know what I mean.”

“She’s not your chef, Rob.” But Ellen would of course be excited. She loved Rob. She’d just been telling me this.

“I know. She’s yours. But she likes me better.”

Probably true. “So next weekend? And how long will you be staying for exactly?”

“Indefinitely?”

I pressed my lips together. Penny could be calling me any minute. Or she could take a while. I was hoping on sooner rather than later though.

“That’s okay, right?” Rob asked. “I figured when you invited me to stay that it was an open ended invitation. It’ll be fun. Like old times.”

Old times. “Have you spoken to Matt recently?”

“Nah, not for a few months. I talked to Mason the other day though. Mr. and Mrs. Caldwell are cutting him off.”

“Why?”

“Because he won’t take over the family business. He has…other interests.”

“The marketing firm he wants to start?”

“What marketing firm?” Rob asked.

“The one he talks about sometimes.” I don’t know. It had been a while since I’d spoken to my childhood best friend.

Rob laughed. “No, man. I heard he’s starting a sex club.”

Wait, what? “You’re joking.”

“And since when do I joke around?”

“Um…always?”

Rob laughed again. “I would never joke about a sex club.”

“Fair.”

“Speaking of the Caldwells, I should go visit. If they’re disowning Mason, maybe they’ll adopt me. Pretty sure I’m their favorite son anyway.”

Honestly, he was probably partially right about that too. We’d basically grown up at the Caldwells’ house. We were practically family. The Caldwells had been through a lot and everyone always welcomed the laughter that came along with Rob. “So does that mean you’re staying with them instead of me?”

“Slow your roll. I was kidding. I’m not made to take over MAC International. I’m more made to…sleep on your couch.”

“You’ll have your own room.”

“Score. I gotta go. But I’ll see you soonish.”

“You said next weekend.”

“Yeah. Next weekend-ish.”

“I’m telling Ellen you’re coming next weekend, so if you’re not here I’ll be eating all your favorites.”

“I hate schedules. But fine. I’ll be there. Later, man. I’m excited for my surprise!” He hung up.

I hoped he wasn’t expecting a car or something. I stared down at my phone. There was still no new message or call from Penny. I forced myself to click on Matt’s name in my phone.

“Hey, man,” Matt said.

I wasn’t sure why, but hearing his voice made tears pool in the corners of my eyes. When would this stop hurting? When could we go back to just being us again?

“I’m a little busy right now,” he said. “Can you maybe call back later?”

He did that a lot. Avoided talking to me. But I needed to have this conversation. I think we both did.

I cleared my throat. “What are you doing?”

“Fixing up an apartment.”

“Your apartment? Or someone else’s?”

“Mine I guess. I’m living here right now. But I’m not staying.”

“Why?”

There was a long pause before he responded. “It’s…too loud.”

It seemed like every time I called Matt, he was moving to a new apartment in New York.

“I’ve been seeing a therapist,” I said. It was a weird segue. But I didn’t think there was a good way to bring this up.

Another long pause. “That’s good.”

We’d grown apart. But I knew he still cared about me. Just like I cared about him. “Sometimes it’s good to talk about stuff.”

“I’m not going back to therapy,” Matt said.

That wasn’t what I was saying. “I just meant that if you ever want to talk about her, I’m here.” I didn’t need to say who. He’d know who I was talking about.

The power drill sounded again. And he didn’t respond.

Matt had gone to therapy for a while after her death. I knew this was a sore subject. But… “I just need you to know that I’m here,” I said again.

“Last time I checked, you weren’t in New York.”

“I’m teaching in Delaware now. You could visit. Rob’s visiting soon too. Maybe a change of scenery would be good for you. A fresh start somewhere outside the city.”

“Her grave is here.”

I swallowed hard. I got that. I’d visited it a few times when I moved back to the city after graduating.

There were always flowers on her grave. And I knew Matt left them.

But if he thought leaving the city meant leaving her, he was wrong.

He needed to keep living. But I knew he didn’t want to hear that from me.

“Look, James, I really am busy. If there’s nothing else…”

It was a Saturday afternoon and he was holed up in some apartment he hated. Missing her. I knew he was missing her. That’s why he kept moving. Perpetually searching for a home when he’d never find it. Because she was his home.

“I miss her too,” I said.

“Don’t.”

We’d made a pact not to talk about her until Matt was ready. But if her death ate at me this much, I couldn’t imagine what it was doing to him. He couldn’t keep living like this.

I took a deep breath. “And I’m sorry. For everything. For the part I played.”

“I know.” He sighed. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

He wouldn’t talk to me or any of our friends. And he wouldn’t talk to a therapist. So who was he going to talk to?

“I’m here when you’re ready.”

“I know,” he said again.

“Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“I miss you too. I know I’ve been a shit friend. But maybe one day soon the four of us could hang out again. Like old times.”

“Like old times,” he repeated back to me. Like he couldn’t even understand the phrase.

I was ready to move forward. But he wasn’t. I got that. But he needed to keep going too. “I’m getting a divorce,” I said. “From Isabella.” I don’t know why I added that last part. Probably because of the silence on the other end.

“Rob told me. I don’t know why you ever married her in the first place. After everything she did.”

“I thought I deserved her. After everything that happened.”

“You worked that out with your therapist, huh?”

“He certainly helped, yeah.”

Another long pause. “Well, no one deserves Isabella.”

I smiled. “Thanks, man. I was also really high.”

Matt laughed. “Yeah. I remember. Do you even remember your wedding day?”

“Barely.”

“I guess that’s probably a good thing in this case.”

Yeah. I wanted to ask him if he still pictured getting married one day. But I was afraid I already knew the answer.

“I’m happy for you,” Matt said. “That you’re finally walking away from Wizzy. And that you’re going to therapy and working through your shit. And all that.”

“Thanks.” But that wasn’t why I was calling. I already knew that deep down Matt still cared about me. Because I cared about him. I was calling to make sure he knew I was sorry. And to make sure he was okay. But I wasn’t really sure he accepted my apology. And he didn’t sound okay to me.

“Rumor has it that you might be getting to take over MAC International after all,” I said.

“We’ll see. Things have a way of not working out how I imagine they will.”

“I think you’re due for a lucky streak.” I hoped he did take over his father’s company. He’d always wanted it more than Mason.

“I really should go. I have some drywall to put up.”

Okay then. I’d said what I’d needed to. He knew I was here for him, whenever he was ready. Our relationship was strained right now. But I was determined to fix it. Whether he wanted me to or not. “Tell Mason I say hi. And your mom and dad.”

“Will do.” He hung up.

I stared down at my phone. There were still no messages or calls from Penny. I knew she needed time. But I also knew I wasn’t going to walk away from us. And I needed to make sure she knew that.

I called her and it went straight to voicemail.

I sighed. Patience had never been one of my virtues.

I needed a distraction. So I ran.

I graded papers.

I went for another run.

I ate cold pizza with Ian.

I showered. Not with Ian.

And I called Penny again before climbing into bed. Again it went to voicemail.

I’d checked the security feed from outside her dorm earlier. She’d never returned to it. I wondered if she was out with friends somewhere. Drinking. I really didn’t like the idea of that. She was supposed to be taking it easy.

I stared at my ceiling. I knew she’d call when she was ready. I just wished I could fast forward time.

Three hours later, my phone buzzing would have woken me up if I wasn’t still wide awake staring at my ceiling. I grabbed it and glanced at the display. It was 2 a.m. But more importantly…I finally had a text from Penny.

"Are you up?"

I texted back. "Yes." But you shouldn’t be. She needed rest. What the hell was she doing?

My phone buzzed again. "Can we talk?"

Seriously, why the hell was she up right now? Maybe she was having as much trouble sleeping as I was. And I could fix that situation. "I'll come get you. Are you in your dorm?"

"We can talk on the phone. Call me."

I frowned at the text. "I want to see you." I need to see you. I needed to make sure she was okay. She’d left more than 12 hours ago.

She didn’t text back right away.

Fuck. She was breaking up with me. The thought settled around me. But I immediately pushed it away. That wasn’t going to happen. Finally my phone buzzed again.

"Let's just wait until the morning. I'm actually pretty tired."

Of course you are, it’s fucking 2 a.m. And I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk to me. She said we could talk on the phone. Which meant she just didn’t want me to know where she was. "Penny, where are you?"

My phone buzzed again. "Please don't freak out."

If she was with Tyler, I was most definitely going to kill him. I gritted my teeth as I typed out a response. "Where are you?"

"I'm in the hospital."

I stared at her text. For a second, my tired brain refused to understand her words.

And then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

What the fuck? What happened? I pushed the covers off of me.

I never should have let her leave. I knew it and I still fucking let her.

I almost fell over as I hopped around, pulling on a pair of jeans while balancing my phone. "I'll be there in twenty minutes."

"I think visiting hours are over."

Fuck that. She needed me. And I was always going to show up for her when she needed me now.