Page 103 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 10

Sunday

“Dr. Clark will see you now,” said the receptionist.

I made my way into the room, closed the door, and sat down.

I was done playing games. I’d told Penny about Rachel, Isabella, and how lost I was in college.

I’d told her I’d gotten fired from my last job for punching the dean.

It wasn’t everything, but it was a pretty good fucking start.

And she chose to stay. She chose me. And I needed to choose her too.

“Good afternoon, James,” Dr. Clark said with a smile. “How was your week?”

This was it. I just needed to get this off my chest and I could move forward.

With Dr. Clark’s help, hopefully. He might also throw me out.

But no matter what his reaction, it wouldn’t change a thing.

I was all in with Penny. Now that I had her back in my life again, I wasn’t going to let her go.

“My week has been fantastic, thanks for asking. Also, I’m dating a student. ”

His smile faded. “Excuse me?”

“Penny’s a student. She’s a senior in my Comm class. We met for a moment before classes started and I couldn’t get her out of my head. Trust me, I tried. I really fucking tried. But…I’m done trying. I think you’re right. I think I’m in love with her.”

“That’s…that’s a lot, James.” He started writing in his notebook.

I tried not to cringe. I knew he wasn’t writing it down to show the dean or anything. But I hated that there was personal information about me in his notebook. Information that could potentially hurt Penny if it came to light.

“Can you not…please don’t write that down.”

He stopped writing and looked up at me. “Very well.” He placed the notebook down. “I was making a note about how you lied in previous sessions about Penny’s identity. You led me to believe she was a colleague. How did you expect me to help you when you weren’t being honest with me?”

I wasn’t expecting that to be the problem he had with all this.

Did he not hear that I was dating a student?

Lying was the least of my problems. I’d made a huge step with that last night.

And I wasn’t planning on stopping today.

I just needed to get it all off my chest. “I couldn’t be honest with you when I wasn’t being honest with myself.

I was trying to resist her.” I tried as hard as I could. But it was impossible.

He nodded. “And when you’re being honest with yourself…how do you feel?”

“She’s all I can think about. We had a little disagreement last week and she wasn’t talking to me and it felt like I was drowning. But when I’m with her I forget about my past. I forget about all of it. I want to be better for her. She’s given me a reason to start…living.”

Dr. Clark smiled. “That’s wonderful.”

“It is? I thought you’d be a little more…judgmental.”

“James.” He shook his head. “I just want you to be happy.”

I was. I was so fucking happy. I was pretty sure I was grinning like an idiot right now. Just talking about Penny made me feel lighter.

“But I am curious about what the dean thinks about all this.”

“I haven’t told him,” I said. “Penny will graduate soon enough. It’s better for her if we wait.”

“Better for her or for you?”

I didn’t need to think that over. “Her. I don’t want to jeopardize her college experience just because she chose to date me.”

“That’s very mature of you.”

I laughed. “Do you usually think I’m not mature?”

“Honestly, when it comes to real relationships, it seems like you don’t have that much experience. Also there’s the fact that you lied to me. That was rather immature.”

“I thought you’d tell me I had to stop seeing her.” And I knew I couldn’t. This whole time…I just knew I couldn’t stay away from Penny. We went from if to when faster than I even had time to process what I was doing. I was done for as soon as she fell into my arms in that coffee shop.

“I may have suggested you stop seeing her. But I also may not have. Like I’ve been saying during our last few sessions…you seem happy when you’re with her. I don’t see anything wrong with that.”

He’d probably think it was wrong that I got off when Penny called me Professor Hunter. But that was a conversation for a different day. I had no idea why her calling me that made me instantly hard. Right now I didn’t care though. I just wanted to enjoy myself for once in my life.

“Have you told her about your past yet?”

“That’s what our disagreement was about.

She found my wedding ring when she slept over.

But I told her about the divorce. Why I married Isabella in the first place.

I told her about Rachel and how I lost it in college and hit rock bottom.

I even told her about how my parents controlled my life and that I got fired from my last teaching job. ”

“That’s all a good start. But it’s not everything.” He stared at me, willing me to continue my admissions.

“I’ll get there.” Geez, a person could only handle so many confessions in one day. I’d tell Penny everything soon. Slowly. So she wouldn’t run away screaming.

“Was that all you told her about hitting rock bottom?”

I tried to think back to the conversation. “Yeah, but I think she got the gist. A few nights ago I also told her I was drunk most of college and had a lot of sexual partners. She knows I used to be a mess.”

“James, that’s not the whole story and you know it. You have to tell her everything. We already talked about this. Just because she’s a student doesn’t mean she can’t handle the truth. You trust her, right? Or else you wouldn’t have risked your job to be with her?”

I didn’t even need to think about it. “I do trust her.”

Dr. Clark threw his hands in the air. “Now that’s a reason to celebrate. You trust someone new! James, that’s a big deal.”

I smiled.

“Did you have her sign a confidentiality agreement?”

“Nope.”

“That’s good,” he said. “That’s a really good step. You trust her!”

I laughed. It was strange having someone so excited about something I did. It was the affirmation most kids got from their parents. But I never got that from mine. “I do.” Trust seemed like such a simple concept. But it was hard for me. I couldn’t help but smile.

“Now, since you lied to me for weeks, I get all the details. Tell me all about her.”

I smiled. I could do that. This was the easiest therapy session of my life. Once I started talking, it was like I couldn’t stop. I sounded like a sappy idiot, and I didn’t give a shit.

Dr. Clark looked almost as happy as I was. Until I let something slip about the cameras I was using to spy on her.

“James, we talked about this. You have to remove the cameras.”

“Yeah, I’m on it. I’ll tell Ian to do it later today.” It was a lie. I had no intention of ever removing the cameras. Penny was mine. And I needed to keep her safe.

He gave me a hard stare. “Are you actually going to tell Ian that?”

“It’s honestly not even my fault. This was all his idea.”

Dr. Clark shook his head. “You just told me that you trusted Penny. If you trust her, you should allow her her privacy.”

“I don’t have cameras in her dorm room or anything. I’m not a creep.”

“She might view it differently.”

“I’ll add it to my list of things I still need to confess to her.” Honestly, Penny kinda loved the thrill of being almost caught. I bet she’d love that I watched her. I thought about how our waiter kept interrupting us at the country club. She was into that. God, I loved how naughty she was.

“James?”

I looked back at Dr. Clark. I think I must have missed something he said, because he was staring at me intently. “Sorry, what was that?” I asked.

“When you first came in you said you thought you were in love with her.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you feel differently around her than you did with Rachel?”

“It’s not even comparable.” I knew now that I never loved Rachel. I’d loved the idea of her when we first met. She felt like an escape from my life. But she just wanted to be a part of it. I was pretty sure she loved money, not me. And I certainly hadn’t loved her.

He nodded. “And what about Isabella? Do you feel differently around Penny than you did with Isabella?”

I laughed. “Dr. Clark, I never loved Isabella. She’s a psychopath.”

He raised his eyebrows.

“Sorry, that was probably insensitive to your line of work.”

“No, that’s not it,” he said. “I’m curious as to why you think she’s a psychopath. You think she’s crazy because she cheated on you?”

I laughed. “No. She cheated on me because she didn’t love me either. I think she’s crazy because she was legit locked up for a while at some psych ward after high school.”

Dr. Clark’s eyebrows pulled together. “You never told me that before. Why was she seeking treatment?”

“She was always a little…cold. And cruel. But she kind of lost it senior year of high school and got a little…murdery. I don’t know.

We were never really close. She was only in my circle because our parents were friends.

That was the only reason. There was just always something off about her.

But when she got out of that place, she seemed calmer. Not nicer. Just…different.”

“So…not murdery?”

“Yeah.” In high school I wouldn’t have been at all surprised if Isabella committed homicide. For a while Matt even thought she had. But Isabella didn’t seem as crazy now. She was just a fucking bitch.

“Interesting. Was she on any medication or anything?”

I tried to remember. “There was something she took every day.” I could picture the plastic orange pill container. “I don’t know what it was.” I’d never cared enough to look.

“Are you at all concerned about how she’s going to react to the news that you’re dating someone else?”

“She should be signing the divorce papers any day now. And like I’ve said, she never loved me either. I honestly don’t expect to ever hear from her again. We’ve always lived very separate lives. The break is going to be clean and easy.”

Dr. Clark nodded. “Well, that’s good.”

It was good. As soon as Isabella signed the papers, I’d never have to see her again. I was thrilled for that moment. I just wanted it all behind me.

“Sorry, we got a little off topic there for a moment,” Dr. Clark said with a chuckle. “So, a student, huh?”

I didn’t know what to even say.

“I’d feel negligent if I didn’t at least advise you to reconsider. This could ruin your fresh start here.”

“I think she is my fresh start.”

He smiled. “Like I said…I just needed to say it. You never really take my advice though, do you?” He laughed. “I mean…how’s the yoga going?”

“I take some of your advice.”

“Well, maybe just ignore what I said. It’s good to see you happy.”

It felt good to be this happy.

“What I was leading up to before I got distracted was…you said you thought you were in love with Penny.” He stared at me. “So…are you or are you not?”

I knew that I wasn’t worthy of Penny’s love. I knew that. But that knowledge had no effect on how I felt. And there wasn’t a doubt in my mind now. “I love her. I’m in love with her.”