Page 106 of Eternal

DAMIR

“Medicine” by Daughter

Present

S he sat in the car next to me, eyes closed, heart too loud to ignore. She didn’t say a word the whole ride, and when we pulled up to the place I rented here, she opened her eyes like she forgot how to.

It wasn’t much, small, plain, old walls, rust in the corners.

And she brought her blanket and her journal up to her chest like a shield she didn’t want to let down just yet.

I opened the door, let her walk in first. She exhaled a long breath like she’d been holding it in for years as I set her stuff down on the sad brown couch. “Come on,” I said softly.

She looked at me like she didn’t trust her legs, but still, she followed. I brought her to the bathroom, I tried not to say too much as she looked around, her gaze heavy.

Then she hesitated.

“ I… You’re gonna see me naked…” she said, barely above a whisper.

I stepped closer, hand cupping her jaw gently, thumb brushing the skin right under her tired eye. “I’m just here to help you take a shower, partner. Nothing else. You want me to leave? Want to be alone?”

She didn’t answer, so I smiled, turned the faucet on, told her where the soap and shampoo were, kissed her knuckles and started leaving.

Then I felt it, her hand on my arm.

“Stay,” she breathed.

“Okay.”

I took off my shirt, staying in my boxers. I held her as she stepped into the tub, helped her out of her hoodie, her shorts. Her hair fell wild and damp down her back, but I only looked at her face.

She shivered. “Are you… disgusted? ”

I kissed her collarbone, then just above her heart. My hands moved slowly, ribs, spine, the ink and bruises she never explained. “All I see is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

She closed her eyes and kissed me, soft, scared, barely there. Our lips didn’t even move, like she needed proof I wouldn’t flinch.

“ Partner … Can you help me?”

I nodded.

I turn the water warmer, letting it run over her while I wash her hair, fingers gentle through the tangles. She stood there quiet, still. I didn’t speak either, and didn't rush it.

Soap, water. Soft. Tender…

When we were done, I got out first, towel around my waist, grabbed a shirt for her, the soft one I barely wear.

I then dried her hair slowly, like she’d disappear if I tugged too hard.

She sat in front of the mirror, hollow-eyed. Somewhere else.

I stood behind her, brushing her curls out.

“It’s just me and you here,” I said low, close to her ear. “Look at me.”

She blinked, her eyes found mine in the mirror, and something softened in them.

She put on my shirt, followed me to the kitchen with her fingers hooked in mine.

I didn’t have much food. Idiot move. Thought I’d stocked up.

“Shit,” I muttered and ran my hand through my hair. “There’s nothing here. Can you wait on the couch? I’ll go grab something.”

She nodded, took the blanket, curled up like she didn’t want to be seen, didn’t even ask for TV, or music. Nothing. She just waited there.

I ran, literally, and I found a tiny Japanese spot still open. Grabbed soup, rolls, rice, whatever they had. When I came back, she was still in the same spot, and didn't even look up.

I sat beside her, opened the boxes, pulled her into my lap like she belonged there.

I started feeding her, and she let me.

Soup first. She chewed like it hurt, like eating meant staying.

“I feel stupid,” she said, voice small.

I smiled. “I love feeding you.”

And I did. Maybe because that’s all I ever did to feel like I was useful. It made me think of when I used to cook for Vlad and the team, back when my hands didn’t shake every time I touched something soft.

She frowned. “Why?”

I brushed a curl from her cheek, chuckled, but it sounded tired. “Because it’s all I knew how to do growing up. Take care of people, it made me feel like I mattered, at least a little.”

She didn’t know how bad it fucked me. How everything burned down after they were gone. One by one. Missions. Mistakes . Grief stacked like bodies in my head.

She looked at me like she could hear it in my silence.

“You’re thinking…”

I set the spoon down and touched her cheek again, slower this time.

“I lost everyone,” I said. “And I don’t want to lose you.”

Her smile was paper-thin. “Guess you’re stuck with me, partner .”

“Oh, what a tragedy.”

She laughed, and it cracked something open in both of us. I’m stuck with her forever…

I kept feeding her until she finished, then sat her down between my legs and braided her hair while she leaned back against me.

Like we weren’t haunted, like maybe we could pretend long enough to believe it.