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chapter twenty nine

how can a heart break so quickl y?

“ Y ou’re wrong, and you know it.”

“Do I?” Finn rebuffed, squaring his shoulders as we stopped in front of the steps thatled up to the townhouse. “Which one of us has grown up with them? Watched them share glances across the dinner table for years? Watched one of them look at my sister like she’s the best thing he’s ever seen in his life?”

My eyes rolled. “Well, obviously that would be—”

“Me. Correct. So hear me when I say that Jess willbe the first one to crack. He has to be.”

I shook my head as we hopped up the steps. “I justcan’t see it. It had to be Dais. You don’t see her face when she’s watching you guys play. It’s this mix between a longing and if-he-doesn't-ask-me-out-soon-I’ll-scream look.”

She had the exact same look when I eventuallywent back to my seat and found her eyes locked onto the rink. She didn’t even notice me as I walked up, only remembering I was missing as I tapped her on her shoulder. When the game e nded, we went to find the boys, her and Jesse saying they’d either meet us at the townhouse or see them tomorrow.

God knows what they were doing, but I didn’t care.Neither did Finn. I just hoped whatever it was involved them confessing their feelings that neither of them ever had to hide, but continued to do anyway.

The breeze shifted and I turned my head, just intime to catch the end of his eye roll. “It’ll be Jess.”

I scoffed. “Daisy.”

“Jess.”

“Daisy.”

“Jess.”

“Dais—”

His mouth crashed against mine before I could finish her name,silencing me completely. It curved over my lips in a way that made my core melt, as his tongue caressed mine.

I moved my hands to the side, careful not to drop the hot chocolates we’d picked up on the way home. But the way his hands were cupping my jaw, reigniting everything I'd felt when he kissed me at the rink, I was half tempted to drop them at our feet and wrap myself around him.

He pulled away slowly, wicked smirk shining down on me, and I savoured everysecond.“Did I win?”

“For now.” I shrugged, wriggling out of his hold andhanding him the takeout cups.

I dug the keys out of my pocket and wedged theminto the lock before pushing on the door, the heat from inside luring me in away from the cold November air.The house was empty, and th e silence was almosteerie after the noise of the rink, but I expected it to be. Daisy was with Jess, and Goldie and Tristan had gone out with Addy and Nate. I couldn’t remember which event Cora was begrudgingly attending, but I knew she wasn’t here.

I dumped my coat and bag over my hook beforerushing over to the fireplace and getting it lit, my hands desperate to thaw out. It didn’t take long for the fire to start crackling; its heat washing over me, grounding me to the floor.

“Here,” Finn said, his voice delicate, handing me acup as he stood over me.

“Thank you.” I took it from his hands, the warmth nipping at my fingertips. A second later I felt a blanket being draped over my shoulders, and I turned my head around quick enough to catch Finn smoothing it out. “Ever the gentlemen.” I quipped, snuggling under the fluffy thing.

He took the space beside me on the rug, shufflingclose enough to slip under the blanket, his arm snaking around my back. “I spent too much time not being, so I’ll do what I can to make it up.”

“You being here is enough, you know?” I lookedup at him, tugging the cup against my chest as I searched his eyes. “This is all I needed—to know that you wanted to be around me.”

“I’ve always wanted to be around you, I wasjust…” He didn’t need to finish, and I didn’t want him to. I didn’t want him to go back to that place he’d tried so hard to escape.

We’d talked on the way home about what I’d heard, and he’d confessed that it was all true. Every name. Every mention. And he’d said ‘sorry’ with enough sadness in his voice that I believed him when he promised me that the only reason behind it was to protect himself, from himself.

The memory of seeing the war raging in his eyes aswe passed under streetlamps was enough for me not to say anything right now. Or bring it up again.Instead, I nudged in closer, letting our bodies settleinto each other like we’d done this a hundred times before. As though this last year had been nothing but a bad dream.

I shifted just enough to feel something dig into my side—hard, pointy. Reaching behind me, I pulled out a pen I didn’t even remember shoving into my back pocket. With the fire crackling low and the night folding in around us, I flicked off the cap and started doodling on my cup lid.

Maybe this was just my anxiety response.

I felt Finn notice, the same way I felt the heat of thefire; a constant warmth that felt like reassurance. But the second the silence hugged us, it let go, thanks to the buzzing of his phone. He pulled it out of his pocket, checked it, and switched it off so fast that I didn't have chance to take a breath to ask him about it. So my eyes fell back onto my lid.

I was halfway through a twisting vine and dotting it with flowers when he finally spoke. “Why do you do that?” His voice was quieter than usual. Every bit fragile. Then, without thinking twice, he rested his head against mine.

My pen stalled for half a second. “Do what?” Iasked, even though I already knew.

“This.” His breath was weaved with a tiny laugh.

I h esitated, suddenly self-conscious. “I don’tknow,” I said at first, but that wasn’t true, and we both knew it. I exhaled. “Okay, fine. I think it keeps me grounded. When everything feels chaotic, I can focus on something small and make it mine.” I twirled the pen between my fingers. “And I like doing it for the girls, and Tristan when we walk to Flo’s because Goldie and the others are too tired to go. If it makes their day even a little bit better, then… I don’t know. Seeing them happy makes me happy.” I tilted my chin up, meeting his gaze. “Does thatmake sense?”

His mouth quirked like he was about to make ajoke, but then just looked at me. Really looked. “Yeah,” he said, softer this time.

Then, so casually it knocked the air right out of me,he reached up and brushed a stray curl off my forehead. Barely a touch. A simple thing if the grand gestures of tonight were taken into account. But it sent something warm curling in my stomach anyway.

“I really love that about you,” he said, like it wasn’t a big deal. Like he hadn’t just thrown that word out there so easily.

“Love what?”

“That no matter the heartbreak that’s thrown at you,you find a way to make sure it doesn’t happen to anyone else.”

I stared down at the tiny vines and flowers, falling sodeep into the swirls that I didn’t feel my lips open. “Sometimes I think that doing nice things for everyone else will make the world stop being so unkind to me.” The truth was out before I could swallow it. But I felt brave enough, ready enough, to not st op. “Like there’s someone out there, watching every little thing I do, judging whether or not I deserve anything good in my life.”

My breath hitched. “After Mom died I thoughtthat I hadn’t been good enough, that I’d done something wrong, looked at someone the wrong way and because of that they took her. And I know now that wasn’t the case. I know it wasn’t the case with Dad either but… sometimes when I remember they’re gone I’ll break down and just start apologising. As many times as it takes until I’m sure someone must have heard me, and hope that they give me a break.” I swatted away the tears breaking over my lash line. “I've never told anyone that before.”

If there was ever anything to be scared about with us before tonight, there shouldn’t be anymore. I’d practically shown him my heart, everything tangled around it and why it was kept behind a fortress. But as I peered up at him, lifting my eyes over the barricade to find him, all I saw was myself.

Finn Rhodes had made me feel seen more times thanI could count. He knew what it was like to lose someone. He knew what it was like to feel so scared and alone that all you want to do is make the world stop spinning so you can get off. But the way he was looking at me now, like he understood every part of me, was another feeling entirely.

It was a feeling that was strong enough to tear that fortress down. I was sure of it.

“I don’t think you know how thankful I am that youtold me that,” he said, his voice a whisper, as though he were talking to my heart.

“ I trust you enough to know it.” My eyes glidedbetween his.

“Forget knowing it. I’ll protect it with everypromise I can make you,” he said, leaning in just a little closer.

I think I’m in love with this man.

And then, just as the space between us started toshrink, the front door burst open.

A heavy thud slammed into the silence,reverberating through the room. My heart stuttered, then plummeted—deep, brutal, like it had been yanked straight down to the core of the earth.

For a split second, neither of us moved. The airtightened, the kind of stillness that only came before something shattered. Then we spun around, my body twisting so fast Inearly lost my balance. My pulse pounded in my ears as my gaze darted to the doorway, expecting a thousand different things. My mind was running too quick to pick, so all of them it was.

The dim light of the fire barely reached far enoughto reveal the shape standing there. A figure, hunched, trembling. My breath caught in my throat, my mind scrambling to put together what I was seeing.

Then, through the fractured light, came the sound.

A broken, gasping sob. And a flash of onyx.

Cora .

Her hands clutched at the door frame like it was the only thing keeping her upright, her face pale, eyes wide and glassy. Another sob tore from her chest, raw and aching, and whatever breath I had left disappeared.

“ Oh my God, ” I muttered, stumbling up andheading towards her on the floor. “Cora?” My voice was trembling as bad as she was.

I held her, and what scared me even more than thenoises she was making was how badly she was shaking.

My hands wandered to hers, wanting to tug her into me, but it was useless, her hands were embedded on the door frame. “Honey, talk to me.”

Fear wrapped around my heart. What on earth could have happened for her to end up like this?

“Okay, okay,” I muttered to myself, as I managedto lift her shoulders enough for her back to straighten. “Honey, I’m going to get you to sit up, okay?”

I turned to find Finn, and before I could ask hewas on the other side of her in a heartbeat, lifting her body at the same time I did and somehow getting her upright.

But her wails didn’t stop, and her laboured breaths wereonly getting more erratic.

“I’ll get some water,” Finn said, before rushing tothe kitchen.

I threw my arms around Cora as I sat by her side,tucking her into my chest finally. I smoothed her hair out of her face, revealing streaming mascara and identical blotchy cheeks.

“I've got you. I've you got.” I reassured her, rocking her out of instinct. “What happened.” My arms held her tighter. “What on earth happened?”

Those barely-there breaths spluttered, but I felt her trying to calm down, to stop crying. Finn was back with the water then, handing her the glass. She took it from his hands, the water inside shaking so much I had to reach out and steady the glass for her. She took a sip, and it was the first time I could see her face clearly.

Her normally porcelain cheeks had turned maroon, as thoughshe’d painted them that way. There were marks on her cheeks, trailing down the skin of her neck where the skin had turned red. I had to stop my mind from jumping to conclusions, but anger began to bubble inside me.

If anyone had put their hands on her…

She moved the glass from her lips, Finn taking itfrom her, before she dragged her hand across her face, wiping away the tears as her breathing settled a little.

Her chest heaved, her voice a breathless whisper as she said, “Jamie…”

My heart dropped another ten stories.

No.

“Jamie? Jamie Jamie?” I asked, my stomach twisting.

She nodded, two more tears spilling down hercheeks. “He tried to—”

“Tried to what?” Finn asked, his voice laced withsubtle anger as he knelt in front of her.

“Cora?” My voice was calm, but my hands wereclenched.

She looked down at her lap, wiping at her tears, asthough ashamed. “He tried to touch me.”

Every little piece of my heart broke for her as thewords slipped out. Panic set in my chest, as though the weight of what she’d said was crushing me.Finn and I exchanged a look, and what m ade me realise that this was happening was the panic that swam in his eyes, the creases in his forehead.

I turned back to her. “What happened?” I askedagain, my voice barely above a whisper.

She sobbed, clutching the blanket that Finn haddraped around her shoulders. “We were on the way back from this… stu—stupid event, and it was raining, so when we got in the c-car, I took my jacket off.” She took three quick breaths, gathering herself. “I noticed him… looking at me. Not in a w-way he had before. I ignored it, but t-then he made a comment about how nice I looked, and it wasn’t in-innocent. I knew it wasn’t.”

Her head fell back into her hands as another sobleft her mouth. I tugged her closer, but even that made me feel helpless.

Cora finally breathed in, lifting her head again. “Iturned my head out the window, tr-trying to ignore it. But then I felt a h-hand on my thigh, and he wouldn't stop moving it hi-higher—” Her voice cracked, and she buried her face in her hands. “I didn’t know what to do, so I just o-opened the car door and ran. All the way here.”

Her words came out in a rush, and then she brokedown completely, her sobs wracking her body. “I knew he’d try something eventually,” she choked out.

That weight crushed my chest again.

Eventually?

But as I went to open my mouth, her sobs started towreck her body, and in no time she was shaking like she was when she came in.

Not tonight. We’d get the story from her when shewas ready.

I pulled her into my arms, holding her tightly. “You’re safe now.” I rubbed my hand up and down her back. "We’ll figure this out. I promise.”

Finn was still standing in the living room when Icame back downstairs, his hands shoved into his pockets, his face half-lit by fire. He turned when he heard me, his expression softening.

“How is she?” he asked.

“She’s asleep,” I sighed, rubbing my arms despite thewarmth of the room. “I’ll call her sister in the morning and figure things out. She just… needs time.”

“So do you,” he said quietly, stepping closer. “Thatwas a lot to handle.”

“I’ll be fine,” I said, though the exhaustion wasstarting to creep in.

Finn pulled me into a hug, his arms wrappingaround me like a shield against the world. I melted into him, letting the weight of the night sink away for just a moment as I breathed him in.

He planted a kiss on my head before he held metighter. “I’ll stay down here tonight. You stay with Cor. I’ll wait for the others to come back and explain.”

I nodded into his chest, smiling out of pure reliefagainst him. “Thank you.”

We stayed like that for a while, holding each otherin the quiet. Eventually, Finn pulled back slightly, just enough to look me in the eyes.

“I hate that I’m leaving tomorrow,” he said, hisvoice tinged with regret.

My heart sank at his words. “Me too.”

Thanksgiving break had snuck up on us out of nowhere. Finn and Daisy were heading home to Montana for a few days. Normally I’d head to Dad’s house, like last year, but that wasn’t possible. For obvious reasons.

Someone had already bought and moved into thathouse now anyway.

But I was still staying in the city, to squeeze inextra practice for sectionals. So was Cora, come to think of it, and given what happened tonight I was more than happy to stick with those plans.But the thought of not seeing Finn felt heavier than it should have.

“I’ll miss you,” he said, his thumb brushing againstmy cheek.

“I’ll miss you too,” I admitted, my voice barelyabove a whisper.

He smiled, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes.“But don’t go slacking on me now, Greene. The second I’m back I wanna see what you’ve been working on.”

“ I’m gonna nail my triple,” I said, trying to lightenthe mood. “You’ll probably get a dozen videos of them by the end of the week.”

“I’ll look forward to it,” he said, his smilesoftening.

For a moment, it felt like the world had shrunkdown to just us, the fire casting shadows on the walls, the quiet wrapping around us like a blanket.

“You should go back up to her,” Finn said gently,though he didn’t let go of me right away. “I’ll wait for the others.”

“Thank you,” I said, standing on my toes to kisshim.

He held me a little tighter before letting me go, and I climbed the stairs, feeling the weight of the night settle over me again.

But, perched at the end of Cora’s bed, I drifted offthinking about what I’d tell him when he got back, and never had the words ‘I love you’ been so easy to imagine confessing.