Page 1 of Three Not-So-Little Words (The Lawson’s #3)
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Pop Goes the Weasel
Ronnie
“ Y eah, baby. You like that?” The man in between my legs asks as I stare up at the ceiling.
If I were to say not at all, would that completely ruin the mood?
Probably.
But with the way he’s going down on me, the mood is basically ruined anyway. It’s like he’s trying to stab my vagina with his tongue. It’s doing nothing for me.
You’d think that me lying here silently would be an indication that I’m not enjoying myself, but this guy is completely oblivious.
Mick and I met at a little cantina here in Brazil. He’s drop dead gorgeous but dumber than a box of rocks. We don’t have much in common.
But none of that matters. He doesn’t need to be a genius or my prince charming. I just wanted to have some good old-fashioned naked fun with a hot guy. I wanted a couple orgasms before I leave Brazil and get on a twelve-hour plane ride back home.
Things are not going according to plan.
I should have opted for my vibrator. She never would’ve let me down like this.
Let’s see if we can salvage this. Time to talk him through it.
“Flatten your tongue,” I encourage. “To the left. Your other left. Up just a little. Right there. Don’t move!”
I’m only gifted with a few licks of total bliss before he reverts to the tongue poking.
“Mick,” I say to get his attention. “Fuck me.”
He stands so quickly you’d think I shot him.
He’s anxious to get to his pleasure. Go figure.
As he sheds his pants and rolls on a condom, I look at his cock.
Not bad. I can work with that.
“You’re so hot,” he says before climbing on top of me.
So are you…when you don’t open your mouth.
He slides inside, and I let out a moan. Unfortunately, it’s going to be a singular one because much like his tongue, his dick starts jackhammering into me. Look, I love a good hard fuck, but this is not enjoyable. It’s clear this guy has watched too much porn and thinks this is what women want.
If I can get on top, I know I can cross the finish line. I know how to ride a dick. This isn’t my first rodeo (pun definitely intended) with a disappointing man.
Just when I’m about to flip him onto his back…he lets out a loud groan.
Pop goes the weasel.
He collapses on top of me, and I waste no time in pushing him off.
“That was great,” he says through heavy pants. “If you give me an hour, I can be ready to go again. I can rock your world one more time.”
Oh, please.
“No can do,” I tell him. “I have to catch a flight.”
“Are you sure? We can do a quickie.”
“Quicker than that?”
I know some guys don’t last long. That’s fine. A quick fuck can be ridiculously hot. But at least put your best foot forward in foreplay and pretend to care about your partner’s pleasure. And don’t be an arrogant asshole. He’s zero for three, so I don’t care if I bruise his delicate ego.
My quip is enough to get him up and putting his pants back on. I start to do the same, and I can feel Mick’s eyes on my ass.
“When do you come back to town?” He asks. “I’d love to see you again.”
“No idea. Probably not for a while.” I hand him his shoes to hurry this show along.
Moments later, I am closing the door behind him and double bolting both the locks.
As soon as I’m alone, I walk over to my suitcase and pull out my vibrator.
“Hello, old friend.”
Eight hours later, I’m standing in line, waiting to go through airport security. With the amount of traveling I do for work, I wonder how much of my life I’ve wasted in these lines.
Probably days.
When it’s my turn, I step up to the conveyor belt and set my carry-on down to send it through the x-ray machine. There are two agents watching the monitors–one man and one woman. The man’s eyes bounce from me to the screen and back again.
I know exactly what he’s looking at.
My vibrator.
My large cock-shaped vibrator. Usually, I keep my sex toys in my luggage that goes under the plane, but this morning, I was so pressed for time that I almost forgot it–hence why I shoved it into my carry-on on my way out the door. I wasn’t about to leave my $150 orgasm inducer behind.
When my bag pops through the other side of the machine, he pulls it to the side and unzips it. When he pulls out the toy and holds it up, you’d think I’d be embarrassed.
Nope.
I’m a sexual woman with needs. That’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
The guy looks me up and down and cocks an eyebrow. I’ve had enough of asshole men at the moment. Today is not the day, bud.
I point my finger at him. “Don’t look at me like that. If more of your kind knew how to find a g-spot, we wouldn’t need things like that.”
The lady behind me adds, “Amen, sister.”
He looks taken back by my words and looks over to his female coworker.
She gives him a knowing look and a nod. Without any more questions, he zips my bag back up and ushers me through.
I snatch it up and say, “Go home and buy your wife some flowers. Then, spend the rest of the night with your face between her thighs.”
I just get to my gate when my phone rings. I see it’s my boss, Rhonda.
“What’s up, Big Red?” I answer.
“Really? Again, with the Big Red? I tried being a redhead for a month, and you’ll never let me live it down.”
“Before, it referred to your hair. Now, it refers to the shade your face turns when I call you Big Red.”
She laughs. “Did you make it to the airport on time?”
“More or less. Security was a pain as usual.”
“What happened?” She asks.
“Let’s just say I’m done with men for the day.”
“Oh, I give it a few hours before you see another cute one and forget that sentiment.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I mumble.
“So, how long is this sabbatical of yours going to last?” She’s referring to the fact that I’m taking some time off of travel and work.
“I’m not sure,” I tell her. “I just need to get my ducks in a row.”
“I feel like you’re leaving me to settle down in domesticity.”
“Ha!” I chortle. “Yeah right. You know me better than that.”
“We’ll see.”
“Yeah, we will when I come back to work,” I say with a heaping dose of sass.
“I can’t wait for a guy to sweep you off your feet and have you thinking about the future.”
I can hear the shit-eating grin in her voice
“Never going to happen, Big Red,” I say with absolute certainty.
“Your Prince Charming is going to show up out of nowhere.”
“You’ve seen way too many Disney movies. I plan on continuing to get laid as much as possible.”
“You can still get laid while in a serious relationship,” she argues.
“I know that. But I also know how easily I get bored.”
My phone beeps, signaling I’m getting another call. I look at the screen before saying, “Hey, Rhonda, I’ll talk to you later. My brother is calling.”
“Alright, but we are not done talking about this.”
I hang up and answer. “Hey, Dylan.”
“Hey, sis.”
“What are you doing?”
“Just feeding your niece. She’s fighting sleep.”
“Don’t you talk bad about her,” I warn. “I’ll be home soon, and I’ll be on her side.”
“Go figure. Just more women to be against me.”
“Dylan, you have four sisters. You’d think you’d be used to it by now.”
Dylan and I are twins, but we have two older sisters and one younger.
“No joke. I’m surprised I have any testosterone left at all,” he jokes. “Speaking of which, it’s even more girly around here than usual with all the wedding planning.”
Our oldest sister, Liz, is marrying Jack, her live-in boyfriend and baby daddy. They were just going to go to city hall and get married, but our mom wouldn’t go for that. She wanted to give them something a little nicer.
I ask, “how’s Mom doing with the wedding planning? Is she stressed?”
“You know our mother. She could lead an entire army into battle without breaking a sweat.”
That’s beyond true.
At this moment, the male security guy I dealt with goes walking by. He stares at me the entire time.
“Great,” I sigh under my breath.
“What’s wrong?” Dylan asks.
“Oh, this airport security guy made a spectacle out of my vibrator in my carry-on. Now, he’s staring at me.”
“I never know what is going to come out of your mouth.”
“You know I have no filter.”
“Still, I would have thought it was a safe bet that when talking about airport security, vibrators wouldn’t have come up.”
I smile. “Dylan, you should know by now that when it comes to me, there are no safe bets.”