Page 27

Chapter twenty-five

Forest

C onsciousness comes suddenly. My head flies up from the concrete. There’s a pool of blood on the ground where I’d fallen. I clamp my hand down behind my ear, almost screaming when a small tendril tries to reach out and grab my finger. The chip was still there, clinging to my flesh, rejecting its destruction. The dream of the boy who’d jumped from Josh’s roof resurfaces. He’d ripped the chip clean from his head and lived. But it wasn’t a dream. It was a memory I know to be true.

“Please don’t let this kill me,” I whisper.

I grab a pillow from the outdoor couch and bite down as I grab the last remaining tendril of the chip, prying it away from behind my ear. I groan into the pillow, shaking so hard I’m afraid that I might pass out again from the pain. My scream is absorbed in the fabric between my teeth, and I can feel yet another tendril pry free from my mind. My vision is hazy, making it harder to focus my energy on tearing away the device from my head. I don't have the energy to call out for him again in my mind. All I can do is pull.

There is movement in the tree line again, followed by a pair of deep, sunken eyes reflecting from my porch's light. Considering all my blood loss, hallucinations of a Shifter are not too far-fetched. The thing watches me from afar, wincing once I let out another loud groan. Closing my eyes, I think about the night of Josh’s party again, feeling the coarse hands of Fallan as we danced and the mark of the boy running along my hand as he slipped from my grasp on the roof. My blood runs hot remembering the way the Officials hauled his body off, my mind racing through the words we exchanged. I think of the way Fallan allowed me to be near him that night, his back unscathed from my father. Does he remember that night? Why did I not remember it? How much of what I know has been planted by the “poison” in my mind the boy spoke of?

A few branches break, unsettling me fully once I open my eyes. The Shifter now stands in front of the brush, its body something out of a nightmare. Its skin is torn to shreds, barely clinging on in some areas. Where eyes once were, there are only deep, sunken pockets of nothing. It points a bony finger at me, listening to my pain.

“Free yourself, Forest Blackburn,” it says through my mind in a haunting tone.

It’s like nails on a chalkboard.

With one final tug, I feel something break away from my head, hitting the deck with a clatter. The light glows red, blinking rapidly. Letting the pillow fall from my mouth, I clutch my wound, stomping my foot onto the chip, hitting it over and over. Its tendrils stop moving when it shatters, scattering amongst the glass and blood scathing the deck. I whip my head to face the Shifter, but there’s nothing but empty space where it had been.

Nudging the sliding glass door with my elbow, I stumble into my kitchen, swiping Kai’s bottle of Cure-All from his bag resting on the counter. I lean over the sink, spraying vigorously, feeling the skin begin to close until nothing but a scar remains. My front and hands are covered in a bloody mess, my motions clumsy from the blood loss.

Everything around me is unbearably loud, like a curtain being lifted from a screen. I feel the flood of emotions threaten to spill from me. With a drag of my mother's last, clean kitchen towel, I quietly rummage beneath the cabinets, grabbing the small spray bottle filled with bleach. I shove my brother's Cure-All into my pocket and rush back outside to the back deck. In a rush, I dump the bottle of bleach out, and wipe away any trace of my blood, watching the deck's wood lose color with each drag of the kitchen towel.

Kicking away the shards of glass and metal, I watch them fall off the edge of the deck and into my rag. I straighten my mother’s pillows. My hand is unable to run through my hair, tangled in bloody knots. I shove the proof of what I'd done tonight in my pocket, giving the door handle one last rub with my shirt before locking the door and tossing my father’s ID back on the counter where he left it. I run my brother's vile of Cure-All under the water, slipping it back into his bag once it is clean. Slowly, I back away from the sliding glass door, darting into the bathroom the first chance I get.

I turn on the shower and strip away my clothes, forcing them into the trash bin. Grabbing the bag with a heave, I quickly tie its end shut. Finally switching on the light, I stare at my ghost of a reflection in the mirror. My neck still has bruises, mostly faded but noticeable if close enough. The underneath of both my eyes are dark, leaving me more tired than awake. My skin is pallid, hugging me like I am nothing but skin and bones, a grotesque reminder of my frailty. I can smell my blood coating me, feeling my hair brush my lower back as the steam from the running shower makes sweat drip down my face. I rub my fingers along the skin behind my ear, and despite how the rest of my body feels, I smile at finding nothing there but my flesh.

“I had no choice,” I whisper, wiping away the steam from the mirror to get a closer look at my eyes. “I had to do this,” I finish, backing away from the mirror. I no longer have the energy to try and speak to Fallan. And given how much alcohol he had, there is no point in trying to get answers from him right now.

I finally make my way into the shower and let my body linger under the running water, watching my blood paint the shower tiles in swirls of red. I stand there transfixed until all of it is washed away and the water runs clear.

I force on the hoodie from the memory, running my fingers along the space where there was once an alcohol stain. The hoodie was shoved far back in my dresser; I’d done an impressive job making sure no one found it. Leaving my hair in a braid, I force the hood up and go back to the bathroom to coat my neck in as much concealer as I can.

I cram the bag of bloodied clothes and glass beneath my bed, keeping my clock unplugged as I pull on a pair of black leisure pants. I force my feet into boots, strapping my blade to my side beneath the hoodie. Glancing at my watch, it reads 5:00 am. Early enough, no one will be up and ready to question why I’m dressed oddly. I quickly move out of my room, silently shutting my door and glancing around at the still house. Slinging the bag over my shoulder, I check every single area I was in last night for any sign of blood I might have missed. I hike up the bag on my shoulder, unsure of where to go or how I will get there.

Shoving past the sliding glass door, I find myself back on the porch, rubbing my throat while observing the beaten camera. Following along the balcony steps, my legs bring me back to where the Shifter stood when watching me. There are no scorch marks or claw marks on the tree, making me question the validity of that interaction. I crouch down to the ground, running my fingers along the small layer of ash between the blades of grass. A crunch behind me has me grabbing my blade. I turn on my heels to meet my brother's confused expression. He holds up his hands, watching me roll my eyes at him as I tuck the weapon away.

“Good morning to you too, crazy,” Kai says, crossing his arms. “Why are you dressed like that?” he questions, moving to lower my hood from my head. I grab his wrist, stopping him before it can reveal the bruises around my neck.

“I'm trying something new,” I say, hearing the gravel in my voice. My throat is still stiff, and the swelling makes it hard for me to steady my tone.

No amount of Cure-All could have completely fixed the damage from the force of the hold Fallan’s friend had around my neck last night.

“You sound like shit,” Kai says, touching my forehead, checking for a cold.

“I'm fine,” I say, swatting away his hand, “I snored too much last night,” I clarify, hoping that's enough to satisfy his curiosity.

“Did you see that some asshole broke our porch camera last night?” Kai questions, expecting me to have an over-the-top reaction. I stay silent, leaning over to observe the tangled wires protruding from the side of our house.

“Good. I hated that thing anyways,” I say, turning from him, sulking away, moving closer to the forestry behind the house and the ward that cuts our access to it off.

I step behind the forest line, running my hand along the ward, sensing Kai following me.

“Is there a reason you seem so off, or should I blame it on yesterday?” Kai questions, tapping the back of my head.

“I slept like shit.”

It's not entirely a lie, but it's far from the truth.

I keep staring forward, pushing harder and harder on the invisible divider keeping us away from the ash-ridden world. Kai’s hand reaches around my arm, stopping me from taking another step.

“What-”

“What are those?” Kai questions, pointing down at the ground.

I look down beneath my foot, moving away my heel to unveil the massive prints etched into the mud of the earth. Unknowingly, Kai looks at the impression of a Shifter for a second time, becoming just as curious as he did the first time he saw one at the Academy the day after movie night. I frown, watching him genuinely believe this is his first time seeing the prints. I stare at his chip with newfound hate, unsure why I ever allowed something so vile to take up residency in my head.

“Would you believe me if I said they are Shifter tracks?” I question jokingly to see what he might remember.

Regardless of my desire to keep it on, I needed to lower my hood to get a better look at the scorched greenery surrounding the prints. Unlike the first set of tracks I saw at the Academy, these are larger. From here, I can now tell it lingered only a few feet from where I had been in a pool of my own blood, which begs the question – if it loves Marked blood so profoundly, why didn’t it attack me?

“Holy shit!” Kai says, reaching out to touch the sensitive spot on my neck. I immediately slap away his hand, darting my eyes at his dumbfounded expression. “Are those hickeys? ” Kai questions, smiling like an idiot. “Is that why you’re acting so off?”

Oh, how I wish that were the case.

I force a half-assed smile, rummaging through my bag for any sign of my sketchbook to quickly document this new finding. My hand finds nothing but scattered odds and ends. I pry the bag open to get a better look. Where there was once a massive sketchbook filled with drawings I’d rather keep to myself, there is now nothing.

It’s gone.

"Did you grab my bag after I had my seizure?"

"Yes, it was almost trampled by everyone trying to get a look at you. Are you avoiding my questions?"

I rise from my crouched position, ignoring Kai’s questions. I run my mind through all the possibilities of where it could have gone, hitting a dead end each time I try to come up with an answer.

“So, you are ignoring me?” Kai questions, keeping up with me in long strides.

“I’m going downtown for a new sketchbook to draw those prints. I’m sure you can find some schoolwork to keep yourself preoccupied,” I say, hoping he takes the hint to stay behind.

“And miss out on the opportunity of questioning you about your late-night activities?” Kai says, poking my neck with a smile. “Never,” he finishes, looking satisfied with his response.

We follow along the side of the ward, not once passing an Official or citizen, given how dense the forestry can get. After Kai's eighth attempt at dragging my hood down, I finally decided to leave it down around my neck, but not before twisting his arm behind his back, which satisfied my irritation with him and this situation at some level.

His curiosity is justified, but in many ways, I barely have answers for myself.

“You don’t think those were Shifter tracks…. Do you?” he questions.

I sigh, angered by the fact that he doesn’t remember seeing those tracks before because his mind had been wiped clean, just like mine was supposed to be.

“What would you do if they were real?” I question, watching him think of his response.

“Most likely report it to an Official,” Kai says, only urging me to keep my mouth shut.

“I’m sure they’re from whoever decided to break our camera,” I say, scrunching my nose anxiously.

“You're keeping something from me,” Kai says silently, sounding the most serious he has this entire walk.

The smell of fresh bread from the downtown bakery hits my nose, and I can hear the quiet chatter of shopkeepers and patrons as people enjoy their day off. The stores are busy with life. The doors are constantly in motion, people carrying armfuls of goods in and out. The downtown area is lined with gray buildings, each made of concrete meant to support itself for years to come. Massive glass windows are plastered in each storefront, showcasing the goods within each business. Citizens scan their IDs to enter to keep Unfortunates out and away from the luxuries the stores provide.

“If I’m hiding something from you,” I say, rubbing my hand along my throat, “I promise it is for your own good.”

He looks hurt by my response, lingering back a few feet to process my words. I continue my march toward town, pulling my hood up again and ignoring Kai’s fluctuating emotional state. A wall shields the back portion of the shops. There’s a section low enough to jump over and make my way there.

I clutch my hand into the bricks, forcing my leg up and over the top, watching my brother's frantic eye movements as he surveys the area to see if anyone noticed.

“What are you doing? The path to the front of the shops is over here,” he whispers, tugging at my pant leg.

“Can you just try to trust me?” I question, shaking away his grasp on my leg.

He stops, letting out a deep sigh. Kai runs his hands through his curls. His mind is at odds, struggling to understand the world around him for the first time.

“I don't know what to believe. All I know is my sister hasn’t been normal for days, and my head feels like a jumbled mess. It feels like you are walking around with the weight of the world on your shoulders, and worst of all, you're shutting me out while you deal with it,” he says, his face filled with sorrow.

“I can only tell you so much,'' I begin, reaching my hand out toward him, “So you'd better learn to trust me if you want answers,” I whisper, waiting for him to walk away from all of this.

There's a moment of hesitation before he grabs my hand, forcing himself over the wall, too.

“Why are we walking behind the buildings?” Kai questions, anxiously fiddling with the buttons on his coat.

“So no one sees us,” I turn toward him, “I thought that part was clear,” I say, motioning to my outfit of choice.

“Is there any reason you are so avoidant of people all of a sudden?” he questions, looking at me with confusion.

I pause, trying to find the best words to say to him.

“Last night-”

A body moves before us, hurling a large beaten bag onto a wooden cart. I hear the figure grunt, struggling to force the bag off its slumped position on the ground. There are numerous baking supplies scattered amongst the bins out here. Some are older, while others are broken altogether. Kai puts his arm out, stopping me from taking another step. I watch the figure closely, seeing a familiar set of dark brown eyes and short brown hair. His dark complexion and kind smile are still visible from this distance.

“It's that Unfortunate who worked the booth at the movie screening,” Kai whispers. I shove his arm down, giving him a look of disapproval.

“I know,'' I whisper back, moving away from my brother and closer to Hunter.

Hunter’s head snaps up, looking more defensive the closer I approach. I see the worry flash over his face. The only thought I’m sure that’s racing through his mind is that I am here to hurt him. Quickly, I pull down my hood, watching his figure relax when he recognizes me.

“Sorry, no popcorn today,” he says with a smile, pausing his work of loading the supplies on the cart so he can wipe off his flour-coated hands.

“I know we’ve met before, but I'm Forest,” I start, reaching out to shake his hand. “Your name’s Hunter, right?” I question, feeling him hesitantly take my hand to exchange the gesture with a firm grasp.

I focus my energy on my brother, who I know wants to walk away, silently urging him with one look to come closer.

“It's the name my mom gave me,” Hunter says, smiling ear to ear. He leans over to observe Kai’s sudden presence. His arms are crossed as he watches us.

“Your twin?” he questions, and I’m surprised at the laugh that leaves me.

“Actually, I am a year older,” Kai says, making sure to answer the question with a snobby tone.

“Don’t be an asshole,” I hiss, nudging him in the ribcage.

He shoots me a look of confusion, looking between Hunter and the bags.

“Are you stealing?” Kai questions, making me slap my hand on my face out of annoyance.

“No,” Hunter says, giving me a somber look. “My family runs a bakery in my sector, so once a week they let me take the used and broken supplies your people don't need here in the market,” Hunter says, pointing out the box of broken eggs and produce.

“Scraps,” I finally say, shaking my head at the sight in front of me.

“They don’t…. They don’t give you new items in your sector?” Kai questions, genuinely curious for the first time in this whole conversation.

Hunter audibly laughs but quickly covers his mouth. I watch his face grow red. Kai’s eyes go wide.

“I’m sorry, I didn't realize what I said was funny,” Kai says, looking more flustered than usual.

I glance up at my brother, mouthing a “shut up” that only makes him shrug his shoulders at me.

“No, that was my fault. I didn't mean to laugh,” Hunter says. “We are blessed to get what we have-”

“Our people give them nothing. Don't be modest,” I say, cutting off the canned response I know Hunter is about to use to appease us.

Kai looks from me to Hunter, waiting for the man to confirm my words.

“We rarely get support," Hunter says, looking pained as he rubs his lower back.

“Did you hurt yourself doing all of this on your own?” Kai questions, struggling to hide the concern in his voice.

“I thought I had someone willing to help me,” Hunter says, my eyes snapping to him, “I think he is still working off a hangover-”

“Fallan’s here?” I question, watching Hunter and Kai both give me a confused look.

“How did you know I meant him?” Hunter questions. Moving towards Kai, I notice he has started picking up a bag to load onto the cart.

“Maybe that’s who your late-night visitor was,” Kai says sarcastically. “I was placing bets on Xavier, but maybe I’m wrong," he continues, only making my face grow redder once the thought of both men’s hands on me fills my mind.

“I was kidding,” Kai pauses, clearly noticing that I had grown flustered. “Did one of them visit you?” he pushes.

Even Hunter looks interested in my answer.

“Just pick up the bag,” I snap, turning away from the boys.

Kai’s face grows red, straining against the weight of the flour. It's not often he has to do any labor.

The two men work together to carry the bags, exchanging a few words that make Kai smile. I lean against the wall, watching the two interact. Kai is nervous and unsure of what to do or say. It is not in his nature to be cruel, and because of it, he has no way to uphold the ideologies of hate he has seen so often associated with Unfortunates. Hunter openly displays his kind and caring nature. He seems open to forgive or to forget, I'm not sure which, but it’s an obvious difference from Fallan’s inability to work towards some sort of meaningful connection between us.

“You didn’t need to help," Hunter says, loading the last bag.

Hunter rolls up his sleeves, revealing several bruises up and down his arms. Kai’s smile drops as he sees them. I take a step forward to get a better look, filled with a sudden anger. Hunter looks embarrassed, forcing his sleeves back down. I watch him rub the back of his neck, looking between us with a lowered head.

“Did an Untouchable do that to you?” I question, watching Kai’s expression turn to something like anguish.

“It doesn’t matter,” Hunter begins, rubbing his eyes with his fingers, “I was out past curfew one night, and I gave an Official some lip. I just needed to get something for my grandmother-”

“They hurt you for just being out a little later? No rule was broken,” Kai questions, looking confused by his words.

“Did you think they didn't hurt us for fun?” Hunter says, genuinely looking for an answer.

“I told you, Kai,” I say, watching my brother's eyes dart to me once more. “I can only tell you so much. Sometimes, you must see it for yourself,” I whisper, feeling the weight of the situation come down on him.

“How long have they done this?” Kai questions, receiving a laugh from both Hunter and me.

“Well, let's see,” Hunter begins, giving Kai a smirk,

“How long have Unfortunates been around?”