Jude

Jude tugged at the collar of her shirt, moving it away from her throat.

She’d decided to wear a tie. It was a queer literary organization, so why not look as gay as she wanted?

Now that she was sitting in the waiting room, though, the knot seemed to be digging farther and farther into her windpipe, making it hard to breathe.

She smoothed out her blazer, double-checked that her folder full of résumés was still in her bag, and tried to take deep breaths.

This was her third interview. Clearly she’d done well enough on the first two interviews to make it here, but the thought didn’t make her any less nervous. If anything, it made her more nervous. After getting so close, failing now would be even more disappointing.

“Miss Thacker?”

Jude looked up, slightly startled, the way she always was when someone called her “Miss.” Sure, she used she/her pronouns, but she thought of her gender more as butch than woman, and it always felt strange when she got a reminder that the world didn’t see her that way.

She stood and shook hands with the tall white man in front of her who introduced himself as Jerome Heirigs, a member of the board of directors. He led Jude into a small conference room and sat down on one side of the table next to Nina Maguire, the woman Jude had met at Richard Gottlieb’s party.

“Jude!” Nina shook her hand enthusiastically. “It’s so good to see you again. How are things at the bookstore?”

“Sales are up fifteen percent this month,” Jude said with a smile. She didn’t mention why.

“And have you crafted any more wonderful displays?”

Jude launched into a description of the new section she’d built.

She’d found a small press online that had been bringing old queer books back into print and struck an agreement to carry part of their selection in-store, to help bring visibility to these underappreciated stories.

Jerome and Nina nodded along, looking impressed.

As she spoke, Jude started to relax. This didn’t feel like an inquisition.

It just felt like talking to two people who also loved books.

After running her through her résumé, Jerome leaned across the table and said, “So, Jude, why do you think you would be a good fit for this job?”

Jude tried to sit tall and sound confident.

“I know I might not have the exact experience you’d expect for this kind of position.

But I know the queer literary world backward and forward.

It’s how I spend my working time and my personal time.

I am passionate about putting queer stories into people’s hands and letting queer people see themselves as the heroes of their own stories.

For a long time I’ve been doing that on the bookselling front, but I would be so excited to have a position where I could make even more of an impact and give queer writers their start.

I would take that responsibility very, very seriously. ”

Nina and Jerome exchanged a glance. A good glance.

“I know you would,” Nina said. “Which is why we’re so excited to offer you this position.”

It took Jude a few seconds to catch up. “Wait, what?” she said. “Just like that?”

“Just like that.” Nina laughed.

Adrenaline rushed through her, making Jude feel dizzy as they gave her an overview of the salary and benefits.

“I—Thank you,” Jude said, hoping she was forming real words. “I’m really excited about this. And I don’t want to seem not grateful. But can I think about it for a few days?”

“Of course you can,” Nina said. “Take until next week. Think it over.”

“But we really hope you’ll accept,” Jerome said. “You’d be a wonderful addition to our company.”

Jude shook their hands and thanked them again.

She paused on the sidewalk outside the building, tilting her head to feel the sun on her face.

She’d done it. They thought she was good enough for this job.

Maybe she was good enough for it. She could do this.

She could ask Kat to help her practice her public speaking, so she wouldn’t choke like she had at the store.

At that thought, the rising euphoria in Jude’s chest started to deflate. If she left the store, she’d be giving up her chance to ever buy it back.

This job was an incredible opportunity. But was she really ready to leave The Next Chapter behind for good?