Page 9

Pete

The printer whirs into life and Pete takes a moment to rub his eyes, scraping his hands down and over the stubble on his chin.

Tapping his phone screen, he sees it’s almost seven o’clock and his heart sinks.

Another night that he’s worked too late to get back in time to help Natalie bath Erin and help get Zadie to bed.

He opens the next drawing on the list and sends that to the printer, too.

He’s still got to pop in on the show house before he leaves.

They’re having a little opening ceremony – just drinks for the site team – before they officially start showing potential buyers around tomorrow.

He doesn’t really fancy it, but he’s going to get it in the neck from Natalie anyway, so he might as well go.

Twenty minutes later, Pete makes his way up the path to the show home.

He doesn’t want to blow his own trumpet or anything, but it really is spectacular, and pride straightens his spine as he pushes the front door open.

Who would have thought that Pete Maxwell, that scrawny kid from the other side of the village (the side with the smaller houses and the mums who nattered over the front garden fences, cigs hanging from their mouths) would be the one to build West Marsham’s most prestigious housing development?

‘Vanessa.’ Pete smiles as Vanessa appears in the doorway.

She’s wearing a fitted red dress that Pete knows the boys on site will have talked about today, and her dark hair tumbles down her back.

‘You made it! Though you’re a bit late, I’m afraid.

’ Vanessa gestures behind her towards the darkened kitchen.

‘The lads all swooped in for a few beers, cheered themselves, and then went to the pub for Fatmir’s leaving drinks.

’

‘Ah, bugger. I didn’t realise they were leaving this early.

’

‘I could still show you round the house, though?’ Vanessa raises her eyebrows.

‘Come on, you should at least see the finished product. You did build it, after all.’

Pete grins.

‘Yeah, go on, then. I suppose I should see what you’ve done with the old place.

’ He follows her into an immaculate sitting room, the walls a calming shade of taupe, with a huge flat-screen TV on the wall in front of two sofas that look far too expensive to sit on.

There are no sticky handprints on the wall, no toys cluttering the plush rug, and the only sound is the hiss of a discreet air freshener that puffs the scent of jasmine and rose into the air.

It’s certainly a more calming space than the one Pete returns home to after a long day at work.

He follows Vanessa into the kitchen – gleaming appliances, white cupboard doors and a strategically placed bowl of exotic fruit on the worktop – through a laundry room and into a spacious garage, before heading upstairs.

The master bathroom is just as opulent as the rest of the house, and when they reach the master bedroom Pete pauses on the threshold.

‘You’ve done a cracking job,’ he says to Vanessa.

‘This is just … God, what I wouldn’t have given to grow up somewhere like this when I was a kid.

’

‘It wasn’t all me,’ Vanessa says, blushing slightly.

‘I had a few ideas, but it was down to the interior team to execute it. And what are you on about? I remember your house being brilliant fun. Your mum always had something nice in the oven, and your dad was so funny.’

‘Yeah, it was a bit of a madhouse.’ Pete looks at his phone.

He had forgotten how much time Vanessa spent at his house when they were seeing each other.

They were only teenagers, and Vanessa’s mum always seemed more than happy to let Vanessa have dinner at theirs.

It’s weird to think about it, but Vanessa had probably spent more time with his mum than Natalie has in all the time they’ve been married.

‘Thanks for showing me round, but I should probably get off home.’

Vanessa glances at the slim Cartier watch on her wrist. ‘Oh gosh, me, too.’ She pulls a face.

‘I’m supposed to be going to a yoga class in twenty minutes but to be honest, I’d rather just have a glass of wine.

’

Pete laughs, but secretly he feels the same.

The thought of a nice, cold pint sounds like heaven, and he’s late already.

‘Tell you what.’ Vanessa pauses as they walk down the front path together after locking the house up.

‘Why don’t we stop in the pub for a quick drink?

If you don’t mind giving me a lift, that is?

The lads are only in town, and Fatmir did say he was hoping you’d pop in to say goodbye on your way home.

I’d be more than happy to skip yoga for one night.

’

Pete hesitates for a moment.

He should go home, back to Natalie and the kids.

But last week when he was late home, Natalie had shoved a screaming Erin in his arms before he’d even managed to get through the door properly, before marching upstairs and disappearing into the bedroom.

He’d had toast for dinner at about ten o’clock that night, once Erin had gone off to sleep.

‘Let me make a phone call.’ Pete lifts his mobile and dials Natalie’s number, exhaling with relief when it goes to voicemail.

‘Nat? It’s me. Something’s come up at work, and I need to sort it before I can leave.

I’m not sure what time I’ll be back.

’ He pauses. ‘Love you.’

The popular gastropub chosen for the leaving do is packed with people, and Pete’s site team are more than a little rowdy when he and Vanessa walk in.

Pete buys a round, clapping Fatmir on the back – he is genuinely going to miss him; they’ve worked together since Pete first started the business – and then joins Vanessa at the table she’s managed to snag in the corner.

‘Cheers.’ Pete clinks his pint against her glass of white wine.

‘They’re a good team,’ Vanessa says, her eyes going to the rest of the lads.

‘They work really well together, and they’re exactly what I was hoping for when I sent you the tender.

I’ve heard nothing but good things about you guys.

’

‘We try our best.’ Pete has wondered more than once why Vanessa chose to send the contract to him to price, and even more why she gave the contract to him.

He knows he isn’t the cheapest around.

Something eases in his chest now at the realisation that it’s got nothing to do with their past. Of course it never did.

It’s his reputation.

‘So …’ Vanessa takes a sip of wine, her eyes closing briefly as the alcohol hits her tongue.

‘God, that’s good. How is Natalie?

I can’t believe I still haven’t met her.

All this time both of us have been living back in West Marsham, it’s hard to see how we haven’t run into each other somewhere.

’

Pete thinks Vanessa probably frequents slightly different parts of West Marsham than he and Natalie do.

He can’t see elegant Vanessa in her classy suits and red lipstick queuing up for a kebab on a Wednesday evening.

‘Nat’s good,’ he says.

‘Tired, you know. New baby and all that.’

‘I bet it’s lovely, having a tiny baby about the place now the other girls …

Emily and Zadie, isn’t it?

Now they’re a bit older.

’

‘Well, swings and roundabouts, you know?’ Pete has only drunk half of his pint, but he skipped lunch and it feels as if it’s gone straight to his head.

‘You forget how tough it is … the night feeds, feeling knackered all the time.’

‘Ah. Things feeling a bit tough?’

‘Something like that.’ Pete sips at his pint again, and feels everything he wants to say – but can’t – bubbling beneath the surface.

‘It’s been a mental few months, really.

’

‘Not helped by everything being crazy busy here. You must be doing something right, though. The houses are flying off plan before you can even get them up.’

‘That’s about all I’m getting right at the moment.

’ Pete smiles but it turns into a grimace.

‘How’s your mum, anyway?

’

‘You tell me.’ Vanessa rolls her eyes.

Pete hasn’t seen Vanessa’s mum for years, but he remembers that they weren’t particularly close.

‘Oh?’

‘She got remarried – again – a couple of years ago, so I haven’t really seen her for ages.

You know how she always used to be, head in the clouds whenever she had a new fella …

She’s ten times worse now.

’ Vanessa sighs. ‘What about your parents? How’s Oz?

’

‘Oh, you know. Same as they ever were. They love it out there, though.’ Pete remembers the day they’d sat him and his brother down to tell them about their plan to move to the other side of the world – remembers the way he’d broken down when he told Vanessa what was happening.

Pete had been devastated, because even though he wanted to go with them, he’d had his own life plan, plus he hadn’t wanted to leave Vanessa.

They’d been together for three years at that point, and he thought he potentially could marry her.

But then his parents had left, he’d gone to uni, met Natalie and left her anyway.

‘Do you get to see them very much? I bet they were thrilled about the baby. I can imagine your mum flying over, telling everyone she met on the plane she was going to meet her new grandchild. I remember how she was that time your brother found that tiny puppy in the woods.’ Vanessa laughs.

‘She never did manage to persuade Dad to keep it.’ Pete smiles as he shakes his head.

‘It’s hard, with the distance.

We don’t get to see them as often as we’d like.

They haven’t been over since Zadie was born, so they haven’t even met Erin.

And Natalie doesn’t speak to her parents at all, so …

’

‘Wow. So you guys have done it all on your own.’ Vanessa sits back, signalling to a drinks waiter for another round for their table.

‘It must have been tough … I know how close you were to your parents.’

‘Yeah.’ Pete nods.

‘Actually, yeah, it has been tough this time around.’

‘A new baby is a big adjustment.’

‘I don’t think I realised how much of an adjustment.

We have two kids together already, and I thought having a third would just …

slot in, I guess. By now, anyway.

’

‘And it’s not worked out that way?

’ Vanessa sips her wine, never taking her eyes off him, and for the first time in a long time Pete feels as though someone is actually listening to him.

‘No. Erin is … She’s a difficult baby.

She cries a lot, and I know it’s tough for Nat.

It’s been tough on all of us.

I come home after hours on site and Nat just shoves the baby at me and shuts herself away in the bedroom.

I can’t remember the last time we ate a meal together.

I can’t remember the last time she even properly talked to me.

It’s almost as if she can’t stand to be around me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love them all,’ Pete says, hastily gulping at his beer, ‘but it’s been a bigger upheaval than we were all expecting, I think.

’

‘Have you tried talking to Natalie about how you feel?’

Pete shakes his head.

‘There’s no point – any time I try to raise anything like that, she just shuts me down and reminds me it’s her that’s home all day with the kids.

Sorry. Ignore me. You didn’t come out to listen to me moan.

’

Vanessa smiles, shaking her head.

‘Come on, Pete, don’t be daft.

We’re old friends. If you can’t talk to your old friends, who can you talk to?

It sounds like Natalie is …

’ she trails off.

‘What?’

‘Honestly?’ Vanessa meets his gaze, the candle on the table giving her face a golden glow.

‘You can tell me if I’m out of order, but it sounds to me as though Natalie is being a little selfish.

’

Pete sits back, stunned for a moment.

This is the thought he’s been privately harbouring ever since Natalie sat across the table from him and told him she was keeping the baby, regardless of what he wanted.

‘I just don’t want this to be it, you know?

’ he agrees. ‘We were meant to go to Australia to look at a plot of land – we were meant to travel and do things together once the girls were older. I even bought tickets,’ he gives a rueful huff of laughter, ‘to go to Australia for Christmas last year, but of course everything is on hold now.’ Pete feels as if his entire life is on hold, and he’s treading water.

Fresh drinks arrive – a shandy for Pete, as he’s driving, and another glass of Sauvignon for Vanessa.

Pete uses the distraction to change the subject, feeling disloyal at speaking so frankly to someone – to Vanessa , of all people – other than Natalie.

‘What about you?’

Vanessa frowns.

‘What about me?’

‘What have you been up to since …?’ Pete trails off, not sure how to finish the sentence.

Since I swanned off to uni and left you behind with your useless mum?

Since I chucked you for Natalie?

‘Since college?’ Vanessa makes it easy for him.

‘Oh, you know. Becoming a hotshot property developer. Riding roughshod over the little people who contest any inch of space being built on.’ She lets out a familiar peal of laughter.

‘I’m kidding . I guess you could say I’m the polar opposite to you.

’ Vanessa smiles as she reaches for her wine, and Pete feels an odd flutter in his stomach.

‘No kids at all. And I don’t think I really want them, to be honest.’ She flushes.

‘I know, it probably sounds weird. Everyone always expects women to want a family but … no, not for me.’

‘What made you …?’ Pete swallows.

‘I mean, what made you feel that way?’ He remembers her always liking kids; at least, she was good with his little brother.

‘You know my dad left when I was really young?’ Vanessa says.

‘Skipped out on me and my mum for a woman two streets away, so that was great.’ She takes a mouthful of wine, but Pete can see the hurt on her face.

‘Watching him bring up two boys with his new wife, while he blanked me if he saw me in the corner shop … I just thought, I never want that . I wouldn’t want to recreate that for my own kid.

’

‘Jesus, I’m sorry.

’

‘God, Pete, don’t be.

I’m all right. I’ve got a pretty brilliant life – posh flat in the centre of town, a nice car, a good job.

I love to travel and kids would just hold me back.

’ The words are right, but the smile Vanessa offers up as she speaks lacks conviction.

‘Really?’ Pete leans forward, keen to know more.

‘I wish I’d travelled after uni – I wanted to do Asia, but it didn’t work out that way.

’ Nappies and broken sleep .

That’s how it worked out for Pete after uni.

‘You’ve never been?’ Vanessa’s mouth drops open.

‘You didn’t ever stop off on your way to visit your mum and dad?

I thought it was the law that if you travelled to Oz, you had to stop off in Thailand on the way.

’ She lets out a peal of laughter and Pete finds himself smiling.

‘I spent last Christmas there.’

‘In Thailand?’

‘Yep.’ Vanessa nods.

‘Karon Beach. Sun, sea and some of the most incredible sights I’ve ever seen.

I loved it even more than Vietnam and Singapore.

I’m headed to Santorini for two weeks at the beginning of September, and I’ll probably try and get away again for Christmas.

’ She eyes him with a smirk.

‘Somewhere hot. I’ve always fancied seeing the Sydney Opera House, unless you can give me any recommendations?

’

‘All I can recommend is Dad’s barbecue skills.

And you need to get the iconic photo for your Instagram.

’ Is she flirting with me?

Am I flirting back? Pete feels a pang of guilt as he realises he’s actually enjoying himself.

‘So, Santorini … That’ll be a nice romantic getaway for you and the other half.

I’ve always wanted to go.

’

‘Other half?’ Vanessa pulls a face.

‘No, Pete, no other half. Flying solo, that’s me.

Literally.’

‘Oh.’ Pete didn’t think he already knew this, but still he doesn’t feel shocked to learn Vanessa is single.

‘Sorry, I just assumed—’

‘I’m going with an old girlfriend from school – remember Sophie?

’ Vanessa says, the air suddenly thick between them.

‘Then Christmas, I don’t know.

I’ll probably decide nearer the time and do something alone.

’

‘It all sounds incredibly glamorous and exciting,’ Pete says, draining his pint.

He can’t deny the little flicker of envy that sparks at the thought of just packing up and going on an exotic holiday at the drop of a hat.

Going away was a military operation before Erin was born – he dreads to think what their next trip away is going to be like.

Mirroring him, Vanessa finishes her wine, screwing up her face when she realises her glass is empty.

‘I love my life, I really do, but … it’s lonely sometimes.

There’s only so many times you can go home to a cold, dark house and feel OK about it.

It would be nice to have someone to share it all with.

’ She glances up at him.

‘Someone who wants to travel and see the world, have adventures. I suppose I just haven’t met the right person yet.

’

Vanessa pushes her empty glass away and slides her phone into her bag.

The pub has emptied out, the site team moving on to somewhere more lively, and the bar staff are cleaning in an attempt to get them to leave.

Pete signals to the waiter for the bill, refusing to let Vanessa go Dutch, even though she offers, and it seems to be the natural thing when they step onto the pavement outside for Pete to offer to walk Vanessa back to her flat.

They chat idly as they walk over the bridge across the fast-flowing river running through the town, the street lights casting an orange glow ahead of them.

Pete wonders how many times he’s walked Vanessa home in his life – too many to count – and it feels weirdly familiar as he glances down at her.

As though he’s stepped back in time.

‘This is me,’ she says as they reach Montpellier Square and the imposing old building where Vanessa has an apartment.

‘Thanks for the wine.’

‘No problem.’ Pete shoves his hands in his pockets and glances towards town, to where he’s left his car.

‘Thanks for a nice evening.’

‘Pete?’

‘Yes?’ He turns back to where Vanessa stands on the doorstep, the door open behind her.

‘Do you want to come in for a coffee?’

Pete pauses, his pulse increasing.

He should go home, he knows that.

But it’s almost eleven o’clock and the kids will be in bed.

Natalie will be curled up with her back to him, her breathing deep and even in that way he can tell means she’ll be pretending to be asleep, and Vanessa’s words come back to him.

There’s only so many times you can go home to a cold, dark house and feel OK about it.

‘Uh, sure, OK. Just a quick one.’ And he steps inside, the door to Vanessa’s flat closing tightly behind him.