Page 33 of The Lost Zone (Dark Water #3)

Alex felt heartened. Dressing quickly, he ran outside to the particular point on the clifftop that he’d named after Solange.

It was a bitterly cold day, but Two was sitting there in a big navy-blue coat, his arms wrapped tightly around his body as he gazed out at the grey sea.

As Alex sat down silently beside Two, he turned with a little smile, then reached out and took Alex’s warm hand in his own cold one.

“You came. I’m glad. I didn’t mean to be so cool with you last night, there was just so much to take in.

All I could think about was whether I could be of any use to you.

I know it’s not much, but I’ve been an indentured servant for longer than you’ve been alive.

I have no possessions, no money, and no influence in the world, but the one thing – indeed, the only thing – I can offer to you is the wisdom of my years, and the ways I’ve found to survive my lot in life. Would that be of any use to you, Alex?”

Alex liked it when Two used his real name. “I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “Not that I don’t appreciate the offer, but your situation and mine are so different.”

“Are they?” Two smiled at him. His expression changed and his tone became brisk.

“Look, Alex – the way I see it, your only purpose in life is to stay alive long enough to bring your houder to justice for killing dear Solange. You can’t do that by being surly and difficult, the way you’ve been around F.

Surely you can see you must play a smarter game? ”

Alex frowned. “What do you mean?”

“You must start to use that big brain of yours, my dear boy.” Two tapped Alex’s head. “Mr Tyler will make sure you don’t have the freedom you need to bring him down if he believes you are still a threat to him.”

“But how can I convince him of that?” Alex asked blankly.

Two squeezed his hand. “That’s what I’ve been pondering all night, and this is my conclusion: your houder sent you here to turn you into the perfect servant because he’s had no luck in taming you himself.

And he needs you tame – not just because he wants you broken for his own sick reasons, but also because he has to be sure that you won’t speak out about his role in Solange’s death.

So, is it possible you could give him just that – the perfect servant? ”

“How would that help?”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake, boy. Think! It buys you time.

You lull the man into a false sense of security by being everything he thinks he wants.

He wants you to serve his sleazy friends – you do it enthusiastically, with no attitude and no talking back.

He wants you to dote on him, to be his perfect servant, to go to his bed like the most willing and infatuated of lovers – so you do it.

Take everything the man throws at you, Alex.

Take it with devotion in your eyes and love in your heart.

Embrace your servitude. Learn every lesson they can teach you here and show him how much you love being an indentured servant.

And not just any indentured servant – his.

Humble yourself, Alex. Humiliate yourself, if you must. Gobble up every ounce of humble pie he throws your way and come back begging for more.

Because only then will he lose interest in you.

Only then is there even a ghost of a chance that you’ll fulfil your one and only mission in life – to find justice for Solange.

Isn’t she worth that, Alex? Can’t you bring yourself to do that for her? ”

Alex stared at him, shocked, appalled, and yet curiously hopeful at the same time. This, at least, was a plan. A way forward. Could he do it, though? Was he strong enough?

“I don’t know,” he said at last.

“Then throw yourself off this cliff now,” Two said forcefully, gesturing at the waves crashing on the rocks below.

“Because your life is pointless if you won’t make this commitment to the one thing you say matters to you.

You must learn to be ruthless, Alex. You must learn to play-act, to be an expert dissembler, and to pretend to be the most devoted indentured servant that has ever existed.

Fool him, Alex, and you’ll stand a chance of getting what you want.

If you can’t, then there’s no point in pretending.

End it now – or he’ll end it for you.” Two got to his feet.

“Now, I’m late for my yoga practice. Stay here and think through what I’ve said.

If you want my help, it’s yours. If not…

well, then I rather think this is goodbye.

” Two leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to Alex’s cheek, and then he walked away.

Alex remained where he was, staring out over the sea, his mind racing.

Was Two right, couching his future in such bleak, binary terms?

A simple either/or choice – were there no other options?

He had never thought about what the likely end of his battle of wits with Tyler would be, but Two, always elegantly logical and concise, had starkly outlined what he saw as the only two possible outcomes.

Alex turned the entire conversation over in his head, trying to find a flaw in Two’s logic, desperately seeking an easier, more palatable alternative.

In the end, he had to concede that Two was right.

There were no other outcomes. That meant the way ahead would be the greatest challenge he’d ever faced.

Was he up to it? Could he commit to it? If not, Two was right about that, too – he might as well give up now.

What would Joe do? Even knowing the man as little as he did, Alex knew he’d do whatever it took, however personally abhorrent.

Two was right; he had to humble himself, learn to be a good servant, hide his true intent, and bide his time.

It might take months, more likely years, but if he played his part well enough, then one day an opportunity would present itself – a door left unlocked, a holopad unattended, a chance meeting with an investigator – and then he’d spring into action.

Until then, he must learn patience, among many other things.

Scrambling to his feet, he walked back to the house. He pushed open the gym door and found Two there slowly going through his yoga poses. Two looked up and met his eye. Neither of them spoke. Two finished his practice and then bowed to Alex, hands pressed against his forehead.

“ Namaste ,” he said softly.

“ Namaste. ” Catching sight of his reflection in the mirrored wall, Alex gave a resigned smile.

“You know, ever since I became Tyler’s IS, I’ve looked in a mirror every day and tried to find some trace of myself.

It’s been important to me, a lifeline to hang on to – who I am, knowing I haven’t lost myself, that he hasn’t really broken me. ”

Two stood behind him and gazed into the mirror over his shoulder. “And now you must learn to lose yourself,” he said quietly. “To become nothing, invisible, a wraith, keeping your true self so well hidden that Mr Tyler doesn’t doubt for a moment that you are totally his creature.”

“Yes,” Alex said sadly.

“It won’t be easy,” Two warned.

“No, but you have a trick – I saw you do it with F once. You emptied your face when he was bullying you, became completely impassive. I need to learn how to do that.”

“Then I’ll teach you.” Two grasped his shoulders firmly.

“I’ve been an IS for most of my life, and I’ve learned many tricks along the way – and you’re going to need all of them if you’re going to convince your houder.

You must commit yourself to the process of learning, not just with me, but with B and everyone else here.

Make good use of everything Belvedere offers, and when you return to Mr Tyler, you will be unassuming, unthreatening – and unrecognisable. ”

From that moment forward, Alex became as assiduous a student as Four, always working hard during lessons with B, and studying any homework she gave them in the rec room after dinner.

When he wasn’t learning from B, he was learning from Two.

Every day after classes finished and every Sunday morning, he went straight to the gym and met Two for tuition.

“First, you need discipline,” Two instructed.

“You’re too used to doing whatever you want, whenever you want.

You’re subject to someone else’s timetable now, so find a few moments in every day to centre yourself.

I use yoga for that, but you can try meditation, tai chi, or anything that works.

Do it whenever you can, whenever you need to, as often as you like.

Learn to control your breathing, find a place inside yourself that’s calm and go there.

However bad things are around you, that’s your safe space and nobody can take it from you. ”

It was harder than it sounded, but Two was an excellent teacher. He was also a hard taskmaster, insisting that Alex begin every session with breath control and meditation. At first, Alex found it difficult to empty his head of everything and be in the moment, but it came more easily with practice.

Next, Two taught him yoga. “It might not work for you, but it’s always worked for me, so let’s try it.

” Two guided him through the principles and poses.

“I can’t teach you everything in whatever time we have here – you’ll have to continue it by yourself,” he said.

“Find other teachers, or a book, or just repeat what I’ve taught you.

Lose yourself in the poses, in the breathing.

Use the time to remind yourself of your mission, and why you’re enduring your houder’s harsh treatment.

If it helps, think of it this way – you are choosing that treatment.

Every blow, every humiliation, every cruel word – you are choosing to take them because you have a purpose.

You could have thrown yourself off that cliff, but you chose to stay and do this.

It’s not being done to you, you’re not powerless, you’ve made a choice. ”