Page 20 of Sweet Hate (If You Dare #1)

AXEL

F inishing up for the day at the bakery, I survey the room.

There are gaping holes in the walls with wires exposed where Lucas and I worked together to prepare for the rewiring.

It looks worse than when the fire ripped through it, so part of me is relieved Haven wasn’t here today to see it.

No matter how desperate I am to see her.

I don’t want her stressing if I can help it.

Lucas looks down at his phone and laughs.

“Did you see these?”

He waves his phone at me, and I see a flash of pink before he fires off a message. My phone vibrates in my pocket, so I pull it out to see I’ve got group chat messages sitting there. Nothing from Haven, though. I ignore the pang of disappointment and slide it back into my pocket.

“Meeting Wolff for a drink at Jett’s, up for it Axeman?”

Lucas stands at the door, wiggling his brows in my direction.

I’m tempted to decline, but what am I going to do in my apartment?

Sit there stalking the group chat again in case she says something, or worse still, I fuck it all up again by texting her the wrong thing or some shit?

I need to try to keep her out of my mind for a while.

“Yeah, why not—haven’t hung out with Swayze in a while. Wouldn’t mind grabbing a shower, though. I can meet you there unless you wanna wait upstairs?”

“I’ll meet you there. He’s already waiting,” he says with a nod as he walks out to his truck.

Walking into my apartment, I dump my stuff on the counter. My phone snags my attention, and I think back to the flash of pink I caught on Lucas’s phone.

Was that Haven?

I need to shower and meet the guys, but my body suddenly seems intent on going back to my phone and the unopened messages.

I run my hand through my hair as I unlock my cell, nervous energy running through my bloodstream in anticipation.

Will it always be like this? How the hell did I get by all this time pretending she didn’t exist?

Apparently now, even given the possibility of having everything I want on a platter, my mind still focuses on her.

I am fucked. So, so fucking fucked.

The new photos hit me like a punch in the gut. My girl looks stunning. Laughing and relaxed with her friends in a black floral dress that’s doing sinful things to her curves. All the blood rushes immediately to my cock, leaving me aching and lightheaded, powerless at the sight of her.

I save the photo to my hidden Haven album, trying to shake off how dirty I feel.

I’m the world’s biggest fucking hypocrite, shoving her away but wanting to bury myself into her wet heat and never let go.

Tossing my phone back on the counter in frustration, I stalk to the shower, the undeniable urge to jack off now urgent before I can go meet the guys.

I need to get laid. Take the edge off this insane need .

Only I don’t want anyone else’s hands on me. I want Haven’s black nails leaving little half-moons on my skin. Marking me as hers even if it’s only for one night.

Frustrated, I stand under the spray, gripping my hard cock in a firm hold.

So much for the ban. Tipping my head back, I picture Haven from today's photo.

I imagine my hands running up her bare thighs under that fluttering short hemline to brush against her core, finding her soaking for me.

I run my nose up the length of her neck, inhaling her sweet scent as I plunge my fingers inside her.

Biting down and sucking, I leave my mark on her body as I move my hand faster and harder, hearing her soft moans in my ear increasing.

She reaches back to grip my hair, pulling it tight as she screams my name, breaking apart on my fingers before I thrust into her hard, desperate, relieved to finally be back home.

Her head falls back in ecstasy, her gorgeous tits spilling out from the top of her dress.

I come with a roar, my palm slamming against the wall to stop me from falling forward, the speed of my orgasm taking my breath away. Jet after jet of cum pumps out, my body shaking with the intensity.

I can’t remember the last time I came this hard. Certainly not by myself, and I’m willing to bet not with anyone else either.

Well, anyone but Haven.

Deep down, I know this isn’t me needing to get laid. This is all her. Feelings I thought I’d long since buried coming back, like a phoenix rising from the ashes, burning everything in its path.

I rinse away the evidence of my fantasy and head out to meet the guys. I need a fucking drink.

Walking into Jett’s, I spot Lucas and Swayze straight away, and where the God of Thunder is, the girls all follow.

Tag team him with Swayze, whose name tells you exactly who he looks like, especially sitting there in his leather jacket tonight, and they are practically a beacon for the single ladies in town .

Ordinarily, this would be the perfect setup. The three of us, occasionally with Beckett in tow, never struggle to find a partner for the night, but I really don’t want that right now.

I catch Lucas’s blue-eyed stare and motion to the bar, subtly shaking my head. He whispers to Swayze, and they both disengage from the women and amble toward me.

“Verona, long time no see, my man.” Swayze smirks as he comes up and slaps me on the back. Lucas follows with a fist bump as he straddles the bar stool and orders us a round of beers.

“Not feeling the ladies tonight, huh, Axeman?” He turns to me, a knowing smile spreading across his face.

“Nah, just want a quiet drink with you guys man.”

Swayze and Lucas share a look before Swayze turns to me, his blue-gray eyes shining. “Since when? I feel like l’d have better odds of winning the lottery than seeing either of you go home solo.”

“Fuck off, Wolff. I do not pick up a chick every time.”

“With your rule of only going there once, I’m amazed there are any left to find.”

I’m ashamed to admit he’s not wrong. There have been a few too many women who said they were good with no-strings, one night fun, and then tried to pull me into more. I’d taken to hitting the next town over with Beckett more often than not before it stopped being fun.

Ignoring his remark, I catch sight of Jett’s inky blue waves walking in from the back. Hell yeah, I was hoping to see the spunky bar owner tonight.

“Hey Jett.” I shout to get her attention, and she rounds the bar with a grin.

“Hello boys. My staff taking care of you?”

“Of course. I was hoping we could have a word. I need a potential favor.”

She quirks a thin brow at me before motioning over her shoulder for me to follow her into her office. Here’s hoping I’m not about to blow it all to hell.

“What’s up, Axeman?” she asks sitting in her leather chair and nodding for me to sit opposite her.

“So, I’m sure you heard about the fire in Grams’s bakery, right?” I mean, in this town it would be impossible not to, but I ask anyway. She nods for me to continue, curiosity filling her expression.

“Haven, her granddaughter, is back in town. She’s supposed to be making cakes for the Merryweather wedding, so Lucas and I are trying to fix up the bakery.

Problem is, the job is bigger than anticipated, and I’m worried it might not get done in time.

I’ve not said shit to her yet because I wanted to figure out a solution first, so I was wondering…

if we run into problems, could she use this kitchen to bake the cakes? ”

I meet Jett’s assessing stare with my own, waiting to see what she’ll say. This is the most realistic backup plan I can come up with, and I’m not above begging.

“Obviously I’d owe you one. Whatever you need sorting around here, just call me and I’ll handle it.”

“You don’t need to do that, Axel. Any friend of yours is a friend of mine, and I remember Haven.

The kitchen doesn’t open till four-thirty.

She can come in and use it whenever she needs to—not just for the wedding cakes, she’ll probably want to bake in the meantime.

Let me grab you the spare key for the back door. ”

The tension I’ve been carrying all day ebbs from me and my body sags in relief. Hopefully Haven will see it as a good thing, at least for now, especially since she can use it whenever she wants.

Jett walks back in tossing the key to me.

“Thank you so much, Jett. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

She laughs as she leads us out, grabbing my arm. “You’d drink a lot less,” she fires off with a wink before leaving me to head back behind the bar.

Heading back to the guys, my heart stutters to a stop before taking off at a wild gallop at the sight of my girl sitting at the bar.

Her pink waves are loosely framing her laughing face, and that sinful dress I just jerked off to now exposes even more of her sexy thighs as she sits cross-legged in her chunky lace-up boots.

Fuck me, she looks hotter than she did in that photo. And the idea of making her come on my hand sends a sharp bolt of lust through me.

Verona, get your shit under control.

I redirect my thoughts to the conversation I had with Cap a few days ago, relieved it has the desired effect and calms the growing erection enough for me to head over there.

I want to tell her about Jett’s offer, but now I’m anxious about whether she’ll see it as a good thing or if I’m about to ruin her night with added stress.

Haven's big aqua eyes widen slightly as she catches sight of me approaching, the rest of the group letting out a ridiculous cheer. Greeting Kim and Mia with a hug, I look back up at Haven, who’s worrying her lip nervously as we make eye contact.

“Haven, can I have a word?” I tilt my head toward the same hallway I just came from, and she jumps off the bar stool and walks ahead of me. Now I just have to ignore the way the sight of her round ass makes my mouth water.

She leans against the wall, one leg perched up behind her, looking up at me curiously.

“Sprinks, I don’t want you to stress,” instantly tension creeps into her face.

Shit, I’m cocking this up already. “I spoke to Jett tonight. I don’t know if you remember her, but she owns this place.

I asked her if you’d be able to use the industrial kitchen here if for any reason the bakery isn’t done in time for the wedding. ”

I hold out the key, and when her fingers brush against mine as she takes hold of it a spark of electricity courses through me.

“Obviously, I’m going to do everything in my power to get it done, but just in case, I wanted you to have a back up plan. She was totally fine with it and offered up the kitchen for you to use any mornings you want. This place doesn’t open till five, so if you need to practice or something…”

My words trail off at the expression on her face, her eyes glittering with… fuck, are those tears? Shit. I’ve blown it, haven’t I?

All of a sudden, she throws her arms around me, my arms curling automatically around her, crushing her against me, where she belongs.

I’m in so much trouble.

“Thank you, Axel. You didn’t need to do that. You’re already doing so much, but I’m so grateful. I’ve been trying to practice in Grams’s kitchen, but it’s just not the same. You’re my hero. How can I ever repay you?”

Her hero? Emotion clogs up my throat at her words and at the feel of her back in my arms. This is the first time she’s voluntarily touched me since she came back. The relief of being able to freely hold her could easily bring me to my knees.

I nuzzle my face into her neck, breathing deep, trying to commit this moment to memory.

All too soon she pulls back, her eyes holding mine.

She brushes a lock of hair off my face before her small hand trails down to rest on my cheek.

I can’t help but close my eyes and hold her hand there.

The charged air around us snaps with electricity.

How did I go so long without this? Without her?

She starts to pull her hand away from my face, but I continue to hold it. Not ready to let her go. To break the connection.

What would she do if I kissed her right now?

Searching her eyes for the answer, I can see familiar emotions swimming there as she nervously bites her bottom lip.

I move my free hand to cup her face, running my thumb across her lip and slowly tugging it free.

She lets out a barely audible gasp as her pupils dilate, the irises almost lost to the big black depths.

Sinking my hand into her silky pink waves, I tug her head back, slowly lowering my mouth toward hers.

This is right. This is her.

Our lips are millimeters apart and fireworks erupt inside me, my burning need for this woman overwhelming and unrivaled.

“Axel, baby, there you are!” A shrill, high-pitched voice rips us out of our moment. Haven's eyes shutter as she immediately jerks away from me. Crushing loss sends ice flooding through my veins.

My eyes fly to the blonde quickly walking toward us. Hell no. Not her. Before I can grab Haven’s hand and pull her back to me to explain, she turns to go.

“I’m going to go find Jett and thank her personally. Thanks again, Axeman.”

Axeman. I swear my heart cracks open at the line she’s just drawn again.

I glare down at Keely, who now has my arm in her grasp.

“What can I do for you, Keely?”

I try to disengage and remove my arm from her vise-like grip without looking like a total asshole, even though I want to smash a hole into the wall in frustration.

“Why so formal, Axey? Come have a drink with me. We had such a good night; we really need to do it again.”

This—this right here is one of the reasons I’ve been avoiding random hookups these days.

Keely and I had one drunken night together months ago, and she won’t let it go.

She’s overly familiar, shows up at the station with food for the guys, and thinks she can lay her hands on me whenever the hell she pleases.

I don’t want to hurt her. I may have earned my playboy reputation and done nothing to dissuade it, but I don’t want to be a dick. I just can’t keep doing this. Especially not now that I’ve been reminded of what it’s like to feel .

When she crawls her fingers down my chest, I grab her hand.

This ends tonight.