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No, it was bigger than that. Worse.

It was connected to the way Jamie had always felt that he didn’t belong.

It was about his reaction to the medicine and the fact that he’d been recovering from that fever in a goddamn freezer.

How there was no official record of him even existing; no ID, no birth certificate, no high school diploma or anything like that.

How Jamie hadn’t known a thing about society or technology, and how that silk robe had always felt…

otherworldly . It even made sense now that the belt was nothing like Jesse had ever seen before, nothing that men were wearing in their world.

It was because Jamie was from a different world.

And ‘leaving’ meant they’d never see each other again.

Ever.

No way in hell was Jesse going to let this happen. “Then… then I’ve made a decision,” he said, his hands clenching into fists as his body trembled with resolve.

Jamie blinked, looking as if Jesse had just caught him off guard entirely. “What?”

“I’m going with you.”

* * *

Jesse

Now that the decision had been made, Jesse was determined to see it through.

He knew it sounded na?ve; they had no idea where Jamie was from, how he had got here, why he had to go back, or anything like that—let alone if it was even possible for Jesse to go back with him when he left.

But Jesse was resolved to do everything in his power to stay with Jamie, no matter where that was.

And if you really thought about it, Jamie had been speaking English perfectly from the very beginning, so it stood to reason that ‘where he was from’ maybe wasn’t as disconnected as it seemed.

So for now, Jesse was handling the part of the process he could control—preparing to leave Carson City—and he figured they’d just deal with the whole ‘when are we leaving,’ ‘where are we going,’ ‘how are we getting there’ mess later.

Of course Jamie had tried to talk him out of it at first, reminding Jesse that his entire life was here; everything he’d ever known, his job, his home, his future career, Austin —but eventually, Jesse had talked him around, and Jamie had accepted Jesse’s decision.

Although he was clearly being very careful to make sure Jesse didn’t feel pressured to do anything he might regret, it was obvious that he was glad Jesse wanted to come with him.

The thought of being separated was breaking Jamie just as much as it broke Jesse.

A part of him still couldn’t quite believe this was happening. It was so bizarre, so unbelievable, that he still sometimes half expected to wake up and discover that the whole thing had been a dream, but here they were.

Austin had taken it pretty hard, Jesse could tell, and he too had tried to talk Jesse out of it.

“You’re talking like a crazy person!” he had exclaimed, once he’d stopped laughing long enough to realize Jesse was serious. “You can’t just move away from fucking EARTH! ”

But eventually, he’d come around as well, accepting things for what they were, and had told Jesse he would support him in everything he decided to do.

Even if it meant saying goodbye forever.

And then he’d tried for a joke, and told Jesse he had better return the DVD’s Jamie had borrowed before they vanished off the face of the earth.

So… here Jesse was, walking the few short blocks from the bus stop to Austin’s apartment, DVD’s in hand.

Additionally, he did have a few actual legal preparations to make before he left (like setting Austin up as something similar to a power-of-attorney), and he also had become keenly aware of the fact that his time with Austin was almost out.

‘Leaving Earth’ sounded pretty fucking permanent, so he wanted to spend as much time with Austin as he possibly could, while he still could.

But when he got to the apartment, he was surprised to see Nate’s car in the driveway.

He almost turned around and left again. He could come talk to Austin later.

But… they were running out of time. It wouldn’t be fair to Austin for him to skip out on what might very well be their last chance to hang out, just because he wanted to avoid Nate.

Besides, he’d been friends with Nate for so long.

Despite the bad way they’d left things the last time they spoke, he still felt like he owed it to the guy to at least mention he was leaving, even if he couldn’t explain where, when, or why.

So he went into the complex and walked down the hall until he got to Austin’s apartment, and made himself ring the bell.

Austin opened it after a minute, and offered a slight smile. “Well hey, what are the odds?” he said. “Guess who else is here?”

“No need to guess,” Jesse told him, stepping in and offering a strained sort of wave to Nate, who was sitting tensely on Austin’s couch. “Saw the car in the driveway.”

“Ah, right,” Nate said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away .

“…Sorry, but what the hell is this?” Austin frowned between Nate and Jesse in confusion as he closed the door. “I thought you two were friends, why all the tension?”

“No reason,” Jesse said at once, before Nate could answer.

He just… still didn’t feel like going into what had happened.

Besides, with him leaving, he wanted to make sure Austin still had someone around to talk to and be friends with—although he wasn’t entirely sure Nate of all people was the right person for that.

On the other hand… so many of Austin’s old friends had dropped him after the accident, while Nate had spent the past three years actively seeking Austin’s forgiveness. If Austin was finally ready to forgive, what right did Jesse have to stop him?

“Right,” Nate muttered. “It’s nothing.”

Austin looked completely lost. “What, did I wake up in the Twilight Zone? Is this some weird alternate universe where you two can’t exist in the same room anymore?”

“No, no, of course not,” Jesse forced a smile for Austin’s sake. “Sorry, I’m just… preoccupied with, uh, getting ready for the move, that’s all.”

“The move?” Nate blinked in confusion.

Jesse nodded. “Um, nothing’s set in stone yet,” he muttered. “But I’m… gonna move, pretty soon.”

“Where?” Nate asked, actually looking upset for some reason. “When?”

“…That’s part of what’s not set in stone,” Jesse told him.

“Right now we’re just in the beginning stages of planning, so…

Well, so here.” He turned back to Austin and handed over the DVD’s.

He should leave. It was one thing trying to avoid running into Nate, and losing time with Austin over it.

It was something else entirely to disturb the two of them when they were obviously trying to reconcile after all these years.

“I just stopped by to return the movies Jamie borrowed,” Jesse said as casually as he could.

“I’d better be off now, though. Don’t wanna miss the next bus. ”

Yeah, that sounded plausible enough.

“Uh, right, okay,” Austin muttered, clearly not buying the explanation, but not pressing Jesse for details.

He took the DVD’s and sighed a little, and then offered Jesse a smile.

“Maybe I can stop by your place sometime?” he asked.

“I have to get to work here pretty soon, but I’m free all day tomorrow. ”

“Sounds good,” Jesse said. “See you then.” He glanced over to Nate, who looked like he was trying to decide something, and offered another wave. “Bye, Nate.”

He turned to leave, but before he could pull the door open again, Nate stood up.

“Wait… How about I give you a ride? No sense wasting the bus fare.” He offered a hopeful, apologetic sort of forced smile—that sort of smile that revealed he actually wanted to talk, and the ride was just an excuse to do so.

A part of Jesse didn’t want to ride anywhere with Nate, for obvious reasons. But… if Jesse really was leaving, and leaving forever, maybe it would be a good idea to at least try to leave on good terms? If Nate really wanted to talk to him, Jesse might as well give him that chance…

“Alright,” he gave in. “Yeah, cool.”

“Awesome, see you two later then,” Austin said with a scoff and a shake of his head. “After you’ve hopefully worked out whatever weird thing this is.”

The two left the apartment and headed down to the parking lot in silence.

Jesse glanced over at Nate, noting a deep, troubled frown on his face, as if he was thinking about what he was going to say.

That was fine with Jesse. He decided to just let Nate take the lead on this; he’d talk when he was ready.

And once Nate started the car and began to drive down the street, he was apparently ready.

“I’m sorry, for what happened,” he said quietly.

“Back at that bar. I was drunk and I was stupid—and that’s not an excuse, just…

thought it might help to know. I’ve been thinking hard ever since, and I realized I’ve had some pretty bad ideas in my head, things that weren’t true, and I feel like an idiot for ever believing th em. ”

Okay… Jesse hadn’t known what to expect, but this was much better than it could have been.

He had always been so scared about having the secret about his orientation come out that it had used to feel like the world might end if anyone ever got to know about it—and after what Nate had said in the bar, it had pretty much confirmed his worst fears.

But… honestly, it all felt so meaningless now.

There were so many things happening, things that were so much more important than this, that it felt almost silly to remember how important it had been to make sure nobody knew he was gay.

It felt like a whole different life.

“I mean… yeah, what you said was pretty stupid,” Jesse admitted, a slight laugh of relief escaping his lips. “But it doesn’t really matter anymore.”

“I really am sorry,” Nate repeated as he drove. “Jesse, are… are you moving because of me?”

“What?” Jesse turned to him in surprise. “No, of course not! There’s just… something that’s been happening, that’s all. It had nothing to do with you at all.”

“Okay, good,” Nate said, letting out a relieved sigh of his own.

“If I’d like… driven you out of Carson City by what I said, I would never have forgiven myself.

Even still, I guess it’s too late, huh?” He frowned as he gripped at the steering wheel.

“I finally got Austin’s forgiveness after all this time, right when I’m losing your friendship.

God, I’m such an idiot… But, I guess I should be grateful I can at least say how sorry I am.

If it takes another three years before you can forgive me, I’ll understand.

But, if you can find it in your heart, I’d really like to all be friends again.

Even if it’s just on, like, Skype or something. ”

Jesse thought this over. A part of him still felt the sting of what Nate had said.

Sometimes it took more than an apology to undo the pain, after all.

But now that Nate had truly apologized, and clearly knew that he’d been wrong, Jesse didn’t really have the heart to hold it against him.

Besides, he just felt better, knowing that when he left this place, he wouldn’t be leaving behind any bad blood between himself and Nate.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” he told Nate, offering a smile. “Being friends again, I mean.”

It did complicate things, though, that he was pretty sure there wasn’t any Skype where he was going.

Still, he wasn’t doubting his decision. This was what he wanted to do.

Anything that meant he could stay with Jamie.

But… it was really starting to sink in, how much he would leave behind.