Page 17

Chapter Fourteen

Koda

She almost figured it out. Ashland isn’t an idiot. It’s why I was trying to leave the gift in the middle of the night. I almost didn’t give it to her since the last time she saw her sketchbook I was right there.

When I spotted her on the front porch from down the street, I should have turned around, but I couldn’t help myself. She looked upset, which is weird for someone who just won a huge award. I just wanted to do something nice for once. That’s the lie I told myself anyway.

She had her guard down. I immediately took the opportunity to explore her tattoos up close. I feel like a fucking crazy person. She’s turning me into a deluded psycho just because we have good sex. Not just good but great. The best sex I’ve ever had. The kind that makes you sell your soul to demons so you can have it again.

She was so melancholy. I’ve seen Ashland get drunk at parties or social gatherings, but drinking alone doesn’t signify someone is happy. I so badly wanted to see what she was looking at on her phone. She didn’t even see me walk up. Then she drew me, and holy shit it was impressive. There was no way in hell I was giving it back. For Ashland, that’s probably the most vulnerable thing she could have done, and she did it for me. I should feel bad that I’m taking advantage of her, but it’s only made me crave her company more. I want to get under her skin the way she’s under mine.

Seeing her interact with Penny was a different side of Ashland. I already know she loves Penny. She risked her life for her. I’ve seen them together in public, but when they were sitting on my couch that same giddiness was magnified. They are an atmosphere, a universe of their own creation. The Cunts of the Century, they call themselves. Fucking accurate.

I heard her when she told Penny not to get into the food because I have a specific way. Then when she asked me to teach her the right way to fold, it made me so fucking hard. She’s made comments about my obsessive tendencies, but they were never judgmental. She has never stopped me. Not even once.

I’ve managed to keep myself from looking at the stolen sketches, so I had to settle for her tattoos. That must be why people appreciate art so much. Whatever Prince did on her hand pales in comparison to all of the tattoos she has done on herself. I can tell the difference in them. There was no way she was going to let me look at her long enough to decipher them, but I fucking tried.

I don’t know what the fuck Cuntsgiving is, but the second she invited me I wanted to say yes. I knew I had already crossed so many lines, though, so I told her maybe. If Ashland is throwing some kind of party I’m going to fucking be there with or without Alexi. I’m definitely not letting Cole have one moment to draw her attention.

Saturday is dark and stormy. Alexi is determined to get to their house around six. Even though no one parties that early, I figured a good pre-game would be worth it. I drive Alexi and I across campus to their little tan house that looks like it has seen better days. There are flowers planted out front that will probably die from frost soon. That has to be Penny’s doing. A stray cat is curled up, sleeping on a chair on the front porch. As soon as we walk up the steps I hear the two of them inside. It sounds like they’re in an all out brawl. Alexi knocks, completely unphased.

“Come in!” they shout in tandem.

He turns the door handle and barges in as if he’s been here thousands of times. We take off our boots and jackets as their argument continues.

“Take it back !” Penny screams.

“Never! I will never take it back. I'll be buried with a fucking VHS of Nutcracker Barbie, and you can live knowing, just knowing, that it’s there,” Ashland yells.

Penny screeches as we come around the corner, launching herself over the couch at Ashland who runs around and hides behind us.

Alexi holds up his hands. “Woah, do not put me in the middle of this.”

“What the fuck is Nutcracker Barbie?” I ask. All three of them look at me like I’m from a different universe. “What?”

Ashland steps in front of me, going toe to toe. She looks like a pink haired Tinkerbell who is about to fight me. “It’s the best Barbie movie ever made. Hands down.”

“She’s fucking delusional. It’s Swan Lake. Everyone knows that. Right, Alexi?” Penny looks to him for support.

He scratches his head. “I actually don’t think I’m qualified to answer that question.”

“Barbie has movies?” I ask him.

“Get out. Get. Out!” Ashland points to the door.

Penny crosses her arms. “Fucking shameful. Anyways, welcome.”

There’s a small table with two chairs, a bar stool at the kitchen counter, and that’s it. Snacks and junk food cover every single surface. The first time I was here I wasn’t really trying to get a good look around. I was focused on Ashland and trying get a read on Cole. The last time, I was putting the laundry on the counter and trying get away before I did something stupid.

Alexi haphazardly looks around, taking a seat at the table. “Got enough food?”

“What the fuck is Cuntsgiving if there isn’t food?” Ashland rolls her eyes.

Penny takes the seat across from him. I don’t know where to go, so I sit at the kitchen counter. Ashland heads down the hallway, and a door slams behind her. Alexi and I glance at each other, a million questions passing between us.

“I’m so sorry. I forgot you were coming over. We’ve been drinking,” Penny sing-songs. “Well, we were drinking last night, and then we kept drinking.”

Alexi bursts out laughing. “What happened to Cuntsgiving?”

Penny is in a fit of laughter. “Oh, it’s in full swing. I didn’t realize you were bringing Koda with you.” Something about the comment is pointed. Ashland didn’t tell her I was invited.

“Oh, shit. Was I not supposed to?” Alexi asks with worry. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. She would have kicked you both out if it bothered her. She’s just really overwhelmed right now.” I narrow my eyes and watch Penny fidget as she speaks. The doorbell rings. “Shit, that’s pizza.”

She starts to stand up, but Alexi pushes her back down. “I’ve got it.”

I clear my throat and cross my arms, leaning back against the counter. “I was invited.”

“What? Yeah, I know Lex invited you. It’s fine.” She gives me a worried smile.

“Nah. Ashland invited me herself.”

Penny tilts her head, analyzing me. “She did?”

“Yeah.” I tap the counter. “Just didn’t tell me what the fuck this was.”

Penny lowers her voice and turns serious. “Ashland didn’t even invite Cole.”

That’s fucking interesting. I don’t know what to think about it. “Good. He gets on my fucking nerves. So what is Cuntsgiving anyways?”

“Uh, well.” She looks nervous. “It’s complicated. There’s a cake.” She winces as if it causes her pain to say that. “I really didn’t think Alexi would come.”

“Why not?” He grins, rounding the corner.

“I figured you had a football thing or something.”

“It’s a bye week.” He tries to figure out where he could possibly put the pizza.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m glad. Thank you, guys. Seriously. Um, but, maybe don’t make any comments on the cake or sing,” she lowers her voice to a whisper, “happy birthday.”

This is Ashland’s fucking birthday. What the fuck? It’s pretty on brand for her to call the damn thing Cuntsgiving. Ashland is exactly the kind of person who would be pissed if anyone said happy birthday, but I feel so unprepared. I should have brought a gift or something, but then I think she might hate that, too. There's a crash from the room Ashland disappeared into.

“Now is your time to leave. You’re about to get schooled in Nutcracker Barbie and Swan Lake. If you watch one, you gotta watch both. This is about to get messy as fuck.” Penny giggles with her hand over her mouth and eyes wide with amusement.

Leave? I’m not fucking leaving. Ashland emerges in a storm with a VHS clutched in her hand. She doesn’t address us, just heads over the TV and sits on the floor to start fucking with something. I realize she’s messing with a VHS player.

“They still make those?” Alexi asks incredulously.

Ashland gets angry, smashing her little fist into the rug. “Yes.”

“Do you need…” he starts to ask. Penny is shaking her head no furiously. “Help?”

“I can fucking do it, asshole,” Ashland sneers.

I watch in amusement as she fights with the thing. After three minutes, I’ve had enough. When it comes to Ashland you don’t ask; you just do. I stalk over and snatch the movie from her. Penny gasps, waiting for Ashland to explode. There’s heat and anger radiating off of her body, but she doesn’t reprimand me as I look at the back of the machine. I check the cables and figure out that the power cord isn’t plugged in. She holds her hand out expectantly and I ignore her, pulling out a black VHS with masking tape over the actual label that has ‘The Best Barbie Movie’ written in sharpie.

I pop it in and turn on the TV, switching through inputs until the movie is playing trailers. She pulls her knees to her chest and watches the screen, still clenching her fists. She’s got on my hoodie with slouchy thigh high socks, and I can see that she’s in her underwear. Her eyes are glued to the screen, watching the trailers like she has never seen them before.

“Watch,” she demands.

I sit on the floor next to her and steal glances at her in my peripheral vision. She’s so serious.

“If we’re doing this thing, we need to be on your level,” Alexi points out.

“Bottom cabinet next to the fridge,” Ashland calls out.

The smell of butter is accompanied by popping. Penny and Alexi bring over all of the food, forcing it onto the coffee table. Ashland is handed a pizza.

Spelled out in pepperoni is ‘CUNT'. Ashland smiles. “I love you, Pen.”

Penny gives her a fond smile with tears in her eyes. “You too, Ash.”

I’ve seen them together, but this is their private life that I'm now witnessing. I don’t think I’ve ever even seen a movie with a friendship like this. If I wasn’t actively involved with Ashland I would think they’re together. We’ve been here maybe ten minutes, and they've already made this insanity feel normal.

I’m about to reach over and steal Ashland’s pizza when one is shoved in my direction.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” Penny warns. “She’ll literally bite your hand.”

“Oh, I’m aware.” I stick my tongue in my cheek.

“Gross. I’m fucking eating,” Alexi says with his mouth full.

“Hello, I’m watching something.” Ashland jabs her pizza toward the screen. “Fucking animals.”

The silence lasts all of five minutes. She slams her pizza box shut after a few pieces and shoves it to the side, pausing the movie.

“What the hell?” Alexi asks.

“Blankets and pillows, duh.” She rolls her eyes. “Come help.”

Alexi is about to stand, but I wave at him to stop and follow her. She appears in moments with her arms full of pillows and a blanket wrapped around her.

She deposits them into my arms. “Thanks.”

I nod and go toss them onto the floor. When I return, she’s got a small linen closet open and is pulling things out of it.

I raise my brows. “I’m surprised everything is still folded the right way.”

She gives me an absentminded shrug. “Fits better.”

She’s standing on the tips of her toes trying to reach blankets at the top. I reach over her and pull them down. She gives me a scathing look and tries to hide her laughter. When we return, Penny is spreading everything out. We collapse to the floor while Alexi and Penny each have a couch.

“Okay,” Penny announces, handing each of us a bottle of liquor. “The drinking game is that every time Barbie talks to an animal, you drink. If she dances? You drink. She saves the kingdom? Fucking drink.”

“So basically every time Barbie speaks, you drink,” Ashland clarifies, sticking a straw into her bottle.

She lays on her stomach and curls the blanket around her, pulling it tight around her head. A case with blunts appears out of thin air, and she hands one to Penny. Blunts and Barbie. Ashland looks like a little kid posted up in front of the TV.

“Everyone good?” Ashland asks. When no one says anything she presses play.

It takes twenty minutes for us all to be engrossed. This shouldn’t be as captivating as it is.

“I think I’m in love with Barbie,” Alexi muses.

Penny throws popcorn at him. “Show Barbie some respect.”

They start hurling insults back and forth, completely forgetting that we’re watching a movie, and decide to go shot for shot. I notice Ashland isn’t partaking. Even though the blanket is wrapped around her head, my hoodie has ridden up, and her ass cheeks are hanging out of her boy short underwear. I can’t stop staring at the flesh, itching to grab it. It’s like she knows I’m looking at her because she glances back and sucks from the straw giving me fucking bedroom eyes, daring me to touch her. I glance at Penny and Alexi. Their view of us is blocked. The volume is turned up so loud that they’re practically shouting at each other.

I take my palm and lightly slap Ashland’s ass, grabbing a fist full and squeezing. She shudders, pretending I’m not even there. I keep massaging the flesh, moving closer and closer until I’m basically on her inner thigh. Penny starts coughing and gives me a pointed look, slurping from her straw. Ashland shoots her a glare and Penny turns back to Alexi to continue their breakdown of the movie. I don’t go any further, just squeezing her ass over and over like it’s a stress ball. And I’m fucking stressed .

When Nutcracker Barbie ends, Ashland rolls onto her back. She’s definitely drunk, and she lights her second blunt with Penny.

“See,” she says slowly, laughing. “Nutcracker Barbie is the best!”

“They haven’t even seen Swan Lake yet.” Penny rolls her eyes.

“And we won’t until I have fucking cake. I know you got a cake, bitch.”

Penny laughs and tries to stand, tumbling down on top of Ashland.

“Where is it?” I chuckle.

“Top of the fridge,” Penny slurs.

I step over them. “Why did you put it up here?”

Penny starts laughing harder. “Because Ashland can’t reach it.”

“Fuck you!”

I grab the box and pull the top off. The cake is definitely homemade. Probably Penny, but it looks really really good. The black frosting is accented with pink and scrawled across it, it says ‘Happy 4th Cuntsgiving! Glad you’re dead’ with a heart at the end. I’m not an expert on birthdays, especially when it comes to Ashland, but there is clearly more to this than Ashland just hating her birthday. I sigh and grab the candles, sticking in the twenty-one that have been set aside. It strikes me that I don’t know how old Ashland is. I wouldn’t have guessed that this is how she would spend her twenty-first birthday. I light them all and carry it over.

The two of them hold each other as Penny grabs her phone. “Shit! The song!”

Her phone rings with a video call, and she rolls over so that she’s facing Ashland. There’s a bunch of incoherent shouting on the other end and Ashland blushes, grinning in a way I’ve never seen before.

“Oye! Let’s go ya fuckin’ wankers,” someone shouts in an accent. “The Cunts are calling.”

There’s tons of screaming, I mean, insane amounts. It sounds like there’s an entire crowd of people screeching. Alexi stands behind Penny, watching whatever is unfolding on the screen with wide eyes.

I hear a door slam, but it only muffles the chaos. A few people are arguing and talking over each other into the phone. I can’t make out what any of them are saying, but they become quiet as someone starts playing guitar. It sounds just like a rudimentary happy birthday.

I crouch down next to Ashland, holding the cake in front of her, because this is important. I can tell.

“You’re both a cunt,

You’re the worst when you’re drunk,

Happy Cuntsgiving you reckless bitches,

We hate your guts.”

Ashland blows out the candles and gives the camera the middle finger before shoving her hand in the perfect cake and smashing it directly into my face. I hear the call end, but Ashland has declared fucking war.

I grab a handful and smash it into Ashland’s mouth. “Sorry, Penny.” Penny descends into a fit of laughter before grabbing some and shoving it in Ashland’s face, too.

“Hold her down, Alexi!” Penny commands, and he jumps on top of her.

Ashland screams and fights while Penny and I repeatedly smash her with the cake until she’s choking and laughing and there’s nothing left.

Alexi rolls off, laughing so hard he can’t breathe. “Fuck, I wanted cake.”

Ashland scrapes some off of her face and shoves it into his mouth. I start laughing, instantly becoming a target. She grabs more and tackles me while Penny is crying laughing on the floor. I pin her down with her hands above her head.

Penny wipes her tears and ends up smearing icing across her face, giving us a pointed look. “We should shower. Come on, Lex. We have two bathrooms. I’ll grab some clothes. We have a lot that should fit you ‘cause Ashland is a thief.”

She helps Alexi up, disappearing down the hallway. The second I hear a door shut I feel my dick get hard.

“You look fucking filthy, baby girl,” I growl into her ear. “Let me clean you up.” I lick the side of her face.

“I always knew you were a dog,” she squeals, trying to get out of my hold. Her legs wrap around my waist and in one fluid motion she flips me over. “I didn’t realize you were really into cake,” she teases.

“You should have known.” I dig my fingers into her hips. “You taste just like it.”

Her teal eyes are full of fire as she licks her lips.

“Here, let me show you.” I take one of my hands and shove my fingers into her mouth, pushing them down her throat.

She sucks the frosting off and closes her eyes. “Penny makes the best cake."

I lift my hips grinding against her, and her eyes pop open.

“Am I interrupting something?” Alexi smirks from the hallway.

Ashland tumbles off of me. “Just making sure Koda got a good mouthful.”

Alexi chokes. “Yeah? Of what?”

“Fuck off, Alexi,” I growl, sitting up.

“Shower is free. I’ll start cleaning up. Unless you would like to do the honors,” he says to me, biting his cheek. “Looks fucking filthy in here, and I know how much you love that shit.”

Ashland bursts into laughter and saunters down the hallway. I shove Alexi into the living room and grab the back of her neck, pulling her into me. “Where do you think you’re going, slut?”

“To shower, Golden Boy.”

I can’t pass up the opportunity. “Not without me.”

She rolls her eyes as I follow her into something that resembles an art studio. She flicks the light on and makes her way into the bathroom, stripping off my hoodie and stepping out of the socks, dropping them onto the floor in a path until she’s naked. She turns in the doorway and looks at me over her shoulder.

“ Coming ?”

I follow her, and lean against the counter.

“We probably have five minutes before the hot water runs out.” She closes the curtain in my face.

“It’s fine. I take cold showers.”

“Ugh, what a fucking weirdo.”

“Wakes me up,” I argue.

“You can leave, ya know,” she says nonchalant. “I know you hate this.”

“What? You think I’m too good to enjoy Barbie?”

“I’m sure you have better things to do.”

I laugh. “You fucking invited me.”

“I was being polite.”

“Yeah, polite. I don’t think you even know what that means.”

The shower turns off, and she steps out, glistening, with water dripping off of her onto the tile. She reaches behind me, grabbing a towel off of the counter. “I didn’t think you would show.”

I stand over her. “I’m glad I did.”

She peers up at me, skeptical, and then shoves me toward the shower. “Clean up. We still have Swan Lake.”

“Yes ma’am." I grin, pulling my shirt off.

Her eyes devour me. “You must be drunk."

I advance on her. “A little.”

“Ew, get off of me. You’re sticky.”

“I’ll make you sticky later.” I step back, and she bites her lip.

“I’ll go get you something to wear,” she mumbles.

Ashland wasn’t lying. The shower is freezing. When I get out, some of my own fucking clothes that I didn’t even know were missing are sitting on the counter. I make it back to the living room to find it fully cleaned up. Ashland and Penny are snuggled up on the couch passing yet another blunt back and forth, doing tricks with the smoke.

“You ready for Swan Lake?” Alexi asks.

“I dunno.” I stretch. “Nutcracker was pretty fucking good.”

Penny scrunches her nose up. “Ugh, you’re just saying that because you stick your dick in the Nutcracker’s number one fan.”

Ashland holds out the tape and I take it, switching them. This one says ‘Best Barbie Movie EVER’ written across. She crawls over to me and takes the Nutcracker, ceremoniously putting it back in the case.

“New rule,” she announces. “Every time you cringe, you fucking drink. I’ll start.” She pulls the straw out of her bottle and starts to chug.

I take it from her. “You’ll run out of alcohol before it even begins.”

“Good, give me a lobotomy after,” she snickers.

“Fuck off,” Penny shouts, throwing a gummy worm at her.

Swan Lake starts and everyone gets quiet. Everyone except for Ashland. She rolls her eyes every five minutes taking drinks. I have to admit, I’m starting to get pretty drunk. She starts shivering from her hair being wet, but she won’t say anything. I grab a comforter that’s folded to the side and throw it over her. She doesn’t protest. I wish she was leaning into me instead of laying on her stomach on the floor. I shouldn’t want her this close. I’m starting to feel like Cole.

Alexi's snores erupt from the couch behind me, and Penny is curled in a ball, asleep, with the blanket over her head.

Ashland doesn’t even turn around. “Told you Swan Lake sucked.”

“It’s…Yeah. Nutcracker was better.”

She has the bowl of popcorn in front of her, digging through it. “They won’t wake up for a while since it was Vodquila.”

“How are you still awake?” I steal some and throw it in my mouth.

“Mm,” she stalls. “I never sleep.”

“I see you’re wearing my shirt,” I whisper sliding my palm up the back of her thigh. “Like a good little slut.”

It looks fucking good on her. They always do. I can feel my dick threatening to get hard. It’s constant anytime I’m with her. I’m so close that I can smell her, blackberries and honey, and my mouth waters. I want her closer. I want to sink my teeth into her flesh like a fucking vampire.

She shifts, laying on her chest and stretching like a cat. Before she can lay back down I squeeze her ass.

“Don’t move,” I command.

I know she wants to say something, but I don’t give her time before trailing my finger over her underwear and pushing it aside.

“Koda,” she whispers.

“I didn’t ask you to talk, slut.”

I slide my thumb through her wetness, then push it inside of her. She lays her cheek down on the rug and closes her eyes. Seeing her like this makes her look sort of innocent, except for the fact my fingers are knuckle deep. I rub her clit with my forefinger and she jolts, her eyes popping open. I want to taste her. I need to fucking taste her. I hook my arms around her thighs, dragging her back.

She looks around wildly. “What are you doing?”

I forcefully press my palm to her back, forcing her to lie back down and inhale her scent. Sweet sweet blackberries. “Watch the movie, baby girl.”

The pad of my tongue licks through her juices, and I fucking groan. It’s not enough. I dig in like a king at a feast. My tongue drives into her, drinking up the flood before I pull away, replacing it with my fingers. Wetness is coating my lips and chin. I twist my fingers and rub the inside of her pussy. She’s so fucking tight.

I know I shouldn’t be putting my mouth on something that she’s used to fuck other men. The thought alone makes me angry. I shove her to the ground. This stupid bitch makes me reckless, just like when I come inside of her. The thought makes me harder. Small puffs of air escape her mouth with whimpers, and god—I love to fucking hear it. I want it louder. I want to be in control of it. She rolls onto her back and watches me. Studying me.

“Come here,” I command, my voice raspy with anger and lust.

She bites her lip and crawls toward me, slinking like a panther ready to pounce, and straddles my lap. I bite the inside of my cheek trying not to give her the satisfaction of a reaction.

Grinding against me, she puts her mouth to my ear. “Is this what you wanted?”

I reach around and grab her ass, squeezing until I know it bruises. I want to see purple marks where my fingers have been. The popcorn bowl falls to the side and she gasps, grinding against me again. This is torture, and it’s the best fucking kind. Those wide teal eyes are trained on mine. I wonder if she’ll draw what she sees right now, and I’ll have to figure out how to steal it. I grit my teeth trying to keep myself calm.

My hands pull at the bottom of the oversized shirt, slipping beneath, and she’s not wearing a fucking thing. I guide them up to her breasts and squeeze, thumbing the nipple piercings, which forces her to moan quietly. I pinch and twist until she falters, grinding against me again. Pushing her underwear to the side, I slide two fingers inside of her. She digs her nails into my shoulders and swallows, taking deep even breaths. I don’t want even breaths. I want uncontrolled. I want her sweating.

I slide the waistband of my sweatpants down, springing myself free, and lift her up. Her eyes are dark and hungry.

“Are you gonna be a good girl and sit on my cock?”

“Not here,” she hisses.

“Right here. You said they won’t wake up for a while. So be a good girl and ride me.”

She nods furiously. I lift her up on her knees and guide her center over me, sliding the tip through her juices and nestling it at her entrance.

Ashland tries to slide onto it, but I stop her. “Only the head.”

She does as I instruct, sliding over me until only my head is inside. I try to keep my hips still, making her rock back and forth. It’s just making me harder, edging me. Pre-cum is dripping from my tip mixed with her arousal, which keeps dripping down my cock. I can’t fucking take it anymore or I’m going to come.

I seal my palm against her mouth. “Be quiet, or they’ll hear. Deep breath, baby girl.”

She fills her lungs with air, and I push inside of her. I grit my teeth trying not to moan, clamping my hand tighter over her mouth. I feel the vibrations of her sounds, but they’re muted. Her muscles spasm around me. It feels just as good as it did the first time, maybe even better. Any second now, Penny and Alexi could wake up and they’ll see what the fuck we’re doing, but that’s the fun in it. We could get caught. I doubt either of them would really care, but it’s the principal of the thing.

Ashland wiggles, settling my dick deep inside of her. I pull my hand from her mouth and push her flush with my body. “I’m going to fuck you, and I want you to stay silent.”

I don’t wait for her to answer. I buck my hips and pain digs into my shoulder. She’s a little fucking sadist, too. It just drives me that much more. I pump into her until my dick is soaked. I can hear how slick she is. I bite down on my fist to keep myself from coming. The closer I get, the more clouded my mind is. The control I have is falling away like a mud slide. Ashland’s nails dig deeper into my shoulder. I’m in the last few seconds of losing myself.

“Ash?”

She releases me and moans. She’s been trying to hold back, but now her pussy is squeezing my cock and there is no going back. “Hmm?”

“Fuck, I’m gonna come inside of you.” I leave no room for argument. I won’t fucking stop.

“Ko-Ko-Koda,” she moans, starting to orgasm.

I grab her hips and force her down, holding her there while I come. Her eyelids flutter as she rocks back and forth riding it out and milking me. Ashland looks like a goddamn goddess. I keep trying to find ways to hate her, and I’m failing miserably. I prefer her company in more ways than one. We’re both panting when we finish, and she glares at me, moving off and leaning against the pillows next to me. She stares at the TV.

“You got what you came for. Now, leave. Take your brother with you.”

“That’s not why I’m here, Ash.”

“Then why are you?”

I take a deep breath, my jaw tensing. “Why didn’t you tell me it was your birthday?”

She swallows, but keeps her gaze fixed forward. “It’s Cuntsgiving.”

“Which happens to be your fucking birthday.”

“Birthdays are pointless. Everyone makes them a thing, and they’re not. What we should really celebrate is another year of not killing ourselves.”

“Then why did the cake say ‘Glad you’re dead’?”

She rubs her eyes with aggravation. “I shouldn’t have invited you.”

“Why did you?”

“Because…I don’t know. You’re not that bad.”

“Wow, a compliment.”

“Fact, not a compliment.”

“Is that how you get around calling it a compliment?”

“Now you’re being annoying. I’d rather watch Swan Lake.”

“It’s your twenty-first birthday, and you’re just going to bitch about Swan Lake?”

“I’m not twenty-one,” she says mindlessly.

I’m once again confused. “There were twenty-one candles.”

“I’m twenty, alright? Fucking leave it alone.”

I try a different avenue. “Who did Penny call?”

She grabs a pillow, shoves her face into it, and screams. “Shut up. Just shut up Koda. None of this matters. We aren’t even friends. Stop asking me personal questions all of the goddamn time. You came. You saw. You can shut the fuck up.”

The thing is, Ashland isn’t actually mad. She’s irritated and maybe uncomfortable, but she’s not mad.

“I noticed Cole isn’t here.”

“I bet you did. You’re in a constant pissing match with him.”

“That guy?” I snort. “He doesn’t have anything to offer.”

Her face turns pink. I fucking love it. “He’s been getting on my nerves.”

“Why? Because he wants you to be his girlfriend?”

“I don’t really care what he wants.”

I do. I fucking care. “I’m gonna be gone next week. We have a game, then we’re going home for Thanksgiving.”

“Okay, and?”

“And, I don’t want you partying with Cole while I’m gone.”

“Did you not hear the part about us not being friends? You don’t tell me what the fuck to do.”

“You just said he’s getting on your nerves. Don’t hang out with him.”

She doesn’t agree, but she doesn’t disagree either. “Whatever.”

It’s as close as I’m going to get to a yes. I chose to go home for Thanksgiving when I didn’t need to. I like being around Ashland. I’ve gotten used to her, and that’s a problem. I can say I hate her, but it’s bullshit. She can say we aren’t friends, but that’s not true either. If it was, then I wouldn’t be here for her fucking birthday. She wouldn’t have made me a playlist or given me a sketch.

I need the space to clear my head, and getting some distance will give me that. Then we can go back to hating each other and having sex. I can go back to just controlling the narrative, because right now, Ashland is the one pulling the strings. She’s playing fucking mind games with me, and I have no doubt that she’s experienced at it.