Page 118 of Saving Ren

“Dad had worked for my Pop and married the boss’s daughter. Nonna and Pop had no sons, so my dad took over running things. When Mum died, he just threw himself into work, wanting to make the business more successful, in her honour I suppose. To do that, he expected us to help. At first, I was just left at home to look after Dani, but he eventually put her into day care, and when I turned thirteen, he started letting me help out on site.”

I put my cigarette out in the butt box and finish my beer.

“My brothers were doing the same but had already decided by then that they didn’t want a trade, they preferred to be in the office. Cooper’s an architect but helps Dani with managing contracts and accounts. Zac’s a draughtsman and doubles as a quantity surveyor, I prefer to be out on-site, so I project manage all of our Melbourne jobs.”

“A real family business,” she says. My head snapping towards her because she’s finally said something.

“It is. I love it. We’re all close, so that helps. But yeah, I love working with my brothers and Dan.”

“That’s nice. I’m glad that you’ve got that.”

Relief almost knocks the wind out of me. She doesn’t sound pissed off, so maybe I might stand a fucking chance here.

“Anyway, while we’re still at school, college or uni, we were all expected to pull our weight and labour for the tradies during the holidays and weekends. Dad wanted us to know what hard work was all about and to be grateful for the dollars we earned. When I was eighteen, I was labouring for one of the bricklaying contractors that worked for us. They were renovating an old place in Glen Ira for some television personality.”

“Nick McAlister,” she states as she puts out her cigarette.

“Yeah. I’m gonna get another beer, you want one?”

“No, could you get me a bottle of water please.”

“Of course.”

I walk in and out of the house with my heart beating steadier and hope singing through my veins as I move.

Handing over Lauren’s water, I continue.

“So, yeah. The couple are living in the house, we’re putting a big extension on it for them, it’s dry, and it’s hot, and this particular day, we’d been cutting bricks, and I was orange. Hot, sweaty, and covered in brick dust.”

I pause and turn and look at her. “I know it’s no excuse, Ren, but at the time, there were a lot of rumours about McAlister having an affair with an intern at the television studio, and they’d paid her off or something, I can’t remember all the facts, but I remember he was never home, and she was always there by herself. Anyway, the boss knocked off at two and left me to tidy up. About twenty minutes later, Karen comes out and asks if I want a cold drink, sees the state of me, asks if I wanted a shower.”

I drain my second bottle of beer.

“You wanna hear the rest of this,” I turn to Lauren and ask.

“Total honesty,” she says without looking at me.

“I had a clean pair of boardies in my truck, so I went and got them, had a shower, put them on, walked out into the kitchen and she just came at me. Kissed me, hands straight inside my shorts.”

“Did you fuck her?”

“Yeah, I fucked her. I was eighteen, Ren. She offered herself to me on a plate, so of course I fucked her.”

“Once? More than once?”

My neck feels strange, the blood pumping through my veins there so hard and fast it feels like it’s throbbing.

“We had a seven-month affair,” I tell her.

“Gabe,” she whispers as her hands come up and cover her face.

“It was sex, Lauren. There was zero emotional connection. I was eighteen and happy to be getting my dick wet on the regular, and she was just using me to get back at her husband. We’d meet up, we’d fuck, we’d leave. Sometimes we didn’t even speak.”

“But it was wrong, she was married.”

“Yeah,shewas married. I was eighteen and didn’t give a fuck. I had nothing to feel guilty about.”

“You didn’t feel bad for her husband?”