Page 29

Gemma

As we left Angelic languages on Monday morning, I overheard Chessie telling Kerry to wait because she wanted to talk to him. Gigi and I were a few feet ahead, and the crowd pulled us even further away from them. I didn’t want Kerry to think I was ditching him, so I edged over to the wall to wait, and Gigi came with me.

“Dadgum, she gave us a lot of homework!” She shoved a fat curl away from her face. “Maybe we can do some of it at work tonight if it’s slow.”

“Sure.”

I watched Kerry slide his hands in his pockets while he listened to Chessie. Her face was angled up at him, although those pitch-black shades made it hard to read her expression.

Wonder if she’s having trouble with Cole Fanishell again. Even though he’s expelled from school, he still lives at the Sanctuary. And he could have enlisted an accomplice, like Reilly did with Whit and Travis.

Concerned now, I listened as hard as I could. The hall was noisy, though, and I was too far away to hear every word, but I definitely heard him say he’d meet her at her dorm.

Then he smiled at her and laid a hand on her shoulder—and my heart broke.

“Gemma? Are you okay?” Gigi’s voice reminded me I was standing in a crowded hallway at school. “Look, I gotta go or I’ll be late.”

“He touched her,” my mouth said all on its own. “He touched her and he smiled at her.”

“What?”

As fire roared up in my chest and stained my cheeks, I spun on my heel and took off down the hallway.

You idiot. When he said he liked you, he meant as a friend. Nothing more.

“Hey! Aren’t you going to wait for Kerry?” I heard Gigi call, but kept moving.

No, I wasn’t going to wait for a guy I liked while he made a date with one of my new friends. I hustled away and didn’t care how many people I bumped into. My eyes filling up, I moved faster, praying I’d make it to the locker room in time. I was mortified enough realizing how mistaken I’d been these past few weeks. I didn’t need to add a breakdown in the hallway to my shame.

I hit the locker room door right as the floodgates opened.

“Gemma? What’s wrong?” Tara ran up to me, Maddy close on her heels.

“I’m so stupid!” I swiped my cheeks with the backs of my hands. “So, so stupid!”

#

Kerry

“You, my friend, are in trouble.”

“Huh?” I looked up at Jax.

“Gigi texted me. What happened with Gemma?”

“I dunno. She didn’t wait for me. When I looked for her, she was running toward the gym like we were late or something.”

That confused me. She always walked to the gym with me. The only reason I was doing this whole school thing was because of her, and she knew it, so why didn’t she wait for me?

“Well, Gigi said Gemma’s face went white, then fire red when they saw you talking to Chessie outside Weatherbee’s class.” Jax kicked my boot with his, and I scowled at him. “Then Gems took off down the hall like Hellhounds were chasing her. So, what’s going on with you and Chessie?”

“Nothing. Well, she owed me a favor, so she’s making me a ward. She wanted to tell me she’ll be finished with it by Sunday, so I can pick it up. Why?”

“Well, my dude, allow me to explain something to you. When a girl hears you arranging to meet another girl, she’s gonna think you’re setting up a date.”

“But I wasn’t.” I frowned and stood up. “What, did she think I was flirting with Chessie or something?”

“Uh, yeah .” John came over and held his phone up. “Tara’s texting me all about it. That’s exactly what Gemma thinks.”

“Why? She can’t be jealous ?” I rubbed the back of my neck and squinted at him.

“Are you kidding? You must know she’s into you.”

“No, she’s not.”

“You said she told you she likes you.”

“She doesn’t like

me like me. Besides, I nearly killed her, moron. Why would she even consider a relationship with me?”

Those last words were hard to get out.

“Kerry, Kerry, Kerry.” Jax shook his head. “Don’t try to figure out why a girl feels the way she does. Just be grateful for it and try not to screw up badly enough to make her change her mind.”

“Unless you’re not interested,” John said. “It’s not right to make a girl think you are if you aren’t.”

“Are you?” Jax asked. “Are you interested in Gemma?”

I dunno what my face was showing, but he grinned.

“Well, if that’s how it is,” he said, “you better find her ASAP and straighten things out before it’s too late.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong!” I threw up my hands. “She misunderstood!”

“No, it’s way more than that.” John shook his head. “Tara says she thinks you broke Gemma’s heart.”

“ What?! ”

“Look at it from her perspective.” Jax now looked as serious as John. “She’s all into you and thinks it’s mutual, since those are the signals you’ve been throwing out these past few weeks. Then she hears you arranging to go out with one of her friends. How much do you want to bet she’s crying her eyes out right now?”

“No bet.” John turned his phone so the screen faced me. “Tara says it’s Niagara Falls over there. She and Maddy are furious at you. They think you’re doing Gemma wrong.”

“But I’m not! I didn’t do anything!”

“We know,” they said at the same time.

“So why do I have to fix it?”

“You don’t have to.” John shrugged. “Of course, then you’ll lose her.”

I strangled a little.

“Think about it, bro,” Jax said. “How would you feel if you heard her arranging a date with—”

I had my fist bunched up in his shirt and was nose-to-nose with him before he finished the sentence.

“Good thing she’s not as violent as you are.” He smirked at me. “But all that acid boiling up in your gut? That’s what she’s feeling right now.”

“Ah.” I let him go and dropped back down on the bench. “Okay. All right. Even though I didn’t do anything wrong, how do I fix it?”

“You tell her the straight-up truth.” John crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t screw around or get wordy. You’ll mess it up. Say you’re sorry she misunderstood and explain what happened and that’s it.”

I nodded. I could do that.

“You’ll be lucky if she goes hiking with us.” Jax reached for his jacket. “She might hide in the locker room the whole hour.”

“Nah.” I pulled my hoodie on. “She has more courage than the three of us combined. She won’t hide.”

#

Gemma

“I’ve been in such a dream world,” I hiccuped. “I didn’t realize he was interested in her. I had the impression he saw her as a little sister. I thought that incident with Cole Fanishell was him just being chivalrous.”

Tara let out a harsh bark.

“He is chivalrous,” I insisted through the messy tears I couldn’t get under control.

“He may be brave and a protector at his core, but he’s not chivalrous . He has few manners, his idea of honor is questionable, and he views kindness as a weakness. He’s far from a gentleman.”

“Maybe he shows Gemma a different side,” Maddy suggested.

“Look, I’m not insulting him. He can learn those things, but he’s not there yet. You know it, too, Gemma.”

“Yes, but I still like him,” I whispered.

“We know. You’ve had a huge crush on him for a while now,” Maddy laid one hand on my shoulder, “and we all thought it was mutual. I’m really, really sorry.”

I nodded, but my brain was replaying the conversation from yesterday when Kerry told me he knew what he was and what he wasn’t. Well, I was pretty clued in about myself, too.

I got average grades, but I was never going to be as smart as Chessie. I stood up for myself and others, but I was never going to be as fierce and outspoken as Tara. I wasn’t out of shape, but I was never going to have Maddy’s defined biceps and abs. I didn’t need a padded bra, but my girls were never going to be in the same league as Gigi’s.

And then there was the whole issue of my hair. Sure, I had a pretty face and a nice figure, but how could a girl stand a chance when she had stick-straight orange hair like mine?

“Okay, John said Kerry and Jax are getting their jackets on.” Tara slid her phone into her back pocket. “I’ll send you a text in fifteen minutes. If things are going downhill, tell them there’s an emergency and head back here. Let me know if you do so we can meet you.”

She eyed my face, and I knew what she was seeing. My skin always reddened and swelled when I cried.

“Guess you can’t fix that, hmm? If he knows you were this upset, he could use that against you or see it as a weakness.”

“He’s seen me cry a hundred times already.” I flapped my hands in front of my face to dry it. “It doesn’t matter.” “Yes, it does.” She gave me a stern look. “You’ve stuck by him since the beginning, and you gave him chances when others wrote him off. Make him wonder if he would miss that loyalty if it were suddenly gone from his life.”