Page 2 of Only Everything (The Obsession #1)

REID

Four years later…

The Appalachian Mountains had always felt like home.

The state varied. With me and my mom always moving around, not even the town mattered.

I used to think that as long as I could see those mountains in the distance, I was where I needed to be.

The silence among the trees used to call to me.

Lure me in as if I could get lost and disappear underneath the canopy of limbs forever.

Solitude had promised to be my savior. It was all a lie. Silence had become my prison.

My foot kept a steady push as the rocking chair I sat in on my porch slowly swayed. The view or beauty I was surrounded by didn’t help. It couldn’t when my past continuously stole me away. And I lived in the flashbacks. In a truth that was just as unbearable as it was maddening.

Frank was supposed to be a new start for me and my mom.

She’d thought so. I knew better. From the moment I met that son of a bitch, I could tell he was no better than my abusive father.

And while it took over a year for him to show his true colors, I’d been right.

That didn’t stop my mom from marrying the bastard.

I tried to stop her. I even begged her one night in a fit of desperate tears to leave him. She wouldn’t. She loved him.

I hadn’t understood it then. I’d never loved anyone but her.

That is, until Tauren came to live with us.

Where I expected the fights between them to get worse, oddly, they didn’t.

Tauren brought light into our dark home.

With her being thirteen years old and me almost fifteen, she became my best friend.

My confidant. She felt like my other half.

I could still see it so clearly as I once again disappeared from my cabin’s small porch.

We laughed. We finished each other’s sentences.

Our new little family started having game nights.

Movie nights. Everyone was finally happy.

But even that didn’t last. The older we got, the worse it started to become.

“Taur, what are you doing out here in the shed? It’s dark. Mom says dinner’s ready. She told me to come find you.”

Her silhouette moved more into the shadows, and her sob brought me forward.

“Taur, talk to me. Why are you crying?”

“I miss my mom. I want to go home.”

The pain in her plea went beyond grief, but I knew from the odd edge in her tone that it had to do with something other than her mother’s passing.

“I can sneak in and read to you again tonight if that’ll make you feel better. We were at a good part. Don’t you want to see if the raiders outrun the lechers? There’s such a back and forth. It’s getting chaotic. You liked that.”

“I’m never going back inside.”

Heavier sobs had me moving in closer.

“If something happened, you can tell me. Taur ? —”

Weight crashed into me, hugging around me tightly.

“I hate him. I hate him; I hate him; I hate him.”

“Who? Frank? Your dad?”

“My mom promised I’d never have to come back. She promised ? —”

My arms tightened around Tauren as more heavy sobs shook her.

I took in the stream from the streetlight illuminating the alley, stepping us closer so that I could see her face.

I pulled back, easing a finger under her chin to lift her gaze.

At a little over sixteen, Tauren was turning into more than a sister—more than my best friend.

With dark hair and deeply tanned skin, her light brown eyes looked golden.

Her jaw was sharp, and her lips were pouty.

She was beautiful, and she fucking had my heart—but in ways I tried not to even think about.

I was older. Almost eighteen, and I knew not to cross lines.

It wasn’t right to feel this way for her, but I couldn’t help it.

“What did he do?”

Her eyes lowered. “Nothing. Forget what I said. Let’s just go inside.”

“No.” I moved my head over so that she was forced to look at me. “What was that? Open your mouth. Let me see the inside of your lip. Is that a cut? Did he do that?”

“It’s no big deal. It’s not the first time. I’m sure it won’t be the last.”

“He hurt you.” It wasn’t a question, just a repeat as realization processed and anger took over every inch of me. It came flooding back from my youth. From before Tauren arrived. Rage blistered like lava as more tears clouded her eyes. “How? Where?”

“I said it’s not a big ? —”

“Taur.”

At my tone, her face drew in, surprised.

Hesitancy only lasted a few seconds before she rolled down her lip and then pushed up the sleeve of her oversized t-shirt.

Bruises, matching what I knew were fingerprints, had my pulse momentarily stopping.

My head spun towards the house, and Tauren fisted my shirt.

“You can’t say a word, Reid. Promise me you won’t say anything. Daddy’s drinking again. He’s mad about something. This will pass.”

“He hurt you.”

“It’s just the beer. He’ll stop again in a few weeks. We just have to stay quiet until this episode passes.”

“And let him get away with it?”

“You can’t say anything.”

“Like hell I can’t. He had no reason for putting his hands on you. And think about it. If he’s hurting you, what about my mom? Someone needs to put him in his place.”

“And that person is you? Reid.” An aggravated sound left her.

“You have to stay quiet. I heard him talking to your mom. He’s looking for a reason to kick you out.

He didn’t say it outright, but you graduate in a few weeks, and he’s been on her about what you’re planning to do with your life.

Becky mentioned you were looking to join the military.

It helped to calm him, but if you do this and confront him now and start a big fight—” Tighter she gripped me.

“He’ll kick you out. He’ll make you leave.

You can’t leave us alone with him. You c-can’t. Promise me. Promise. You ? —”

The sobs were near hysterical as I pulled Tauren back in to hug around her. Whatever she knew and wasn’t saying about her father was bad. This went beyond a few bruises and a busted lip. She had secrets. I didn’t like that.

Silence.

The memories faded out, bleeding from my mind’s eye as the trunks of trees once again took over. I stared into the distance, coming and going. Dissociating as I once again hopped between key moments of my life.

I’d come here to forget it all. To escape the loud explosions and screams from serving my country that were trapped within my mind. I had no idea they’d be loudest of all in the one place that used to make me feel safe. Calm. Home.

Was I home? Technically. I was a good half hour drive from our old house, but this was no home I remembered. Not that any place was really a sanctuary. But Tauren had been once. She’d been my peace. My happiness. My hope for a better future.

“Wake up. Reid.” My body rocked from her pushing into my shoulder. “Reid.”

“Hmm? Taur? What are you doing? Did you have another bad dream?”

She pulled the covers back, climbing under my blankets and holding around me. Her body was trembling. She was shaking so badly that it drew me from the grogginess that kept trying to pull me under.

“I have an aunt in Virginia. I don’t know her but ? —”

My head reared back as I pried her away so that I could look over at her. “What are you talking about? You’re not thinking of leaving…are you?”

“I can’t take anymore ? —”

I sat up, flipping on my bedside lamp as protectiveness merged with rage. My eyes weren’t even adjusted as my hands began inspecting.

“If that motherfucker ? —”

“Shh, Reid, please. You have to be quiet. If he hears you—if he comes ? —”

Blinking hard, I willed her into focus, scanning her face, turning her head back and forth so I could see the sides of her cheeks and neck.

I moved further down, pulling back the collar on her tee.

She practically lived in oversized shirts, but this one was mine.

It was more fitted than the others. It had my hands slowing and me swallowing hard as I realized just how tight it was against her with how she was laying.

I could see her curves and the shape of her breasts.

The shirt was so short, I could even see the pale pink panties covering the one thing I tried not to think about.

“Fuck. I…I don’t see anything. You can’t leave, Taur. I won’t let him hurt you anymore.”

“You already said that months ago. It’s not your fault this keeps happening.

He’s not getting better; he’s getting worse.

You had plans for your future, and you’ve already delayed them time and time again.

It’s making Daddy…it’s—You have to leave, Reid.

I’m in my senior year now. I can finish school in Virginia. I’ll be safer there.”

“Fuck that. I’m not going to leave you to run off to some stranger’s house, nor am I going to leave my mom here unprotected with that piece of shit. I’m going to confront him. This has to stop. ”

“Confront him? Reid, please, you can’t. Think about your mom.

She doesn’t deserve this. …Think about me.

He’ll kick you out for sure, and then we’re both trapped here without you anyway.

He’s desperate for a reason now that you’ve been out of school.

He doesn’t care that you’ve been working. Don’t give him an excuse.”

“You have no idea what you’re asking me. I’m on the verge of killing him. I can’t—I fucking won’t sit by anymore ? —”

“I think I have a plan.”

Seconds passed and I nodded, focusing back on her. “Where did he hurt you?”

The tears filled Tauren’s eyes, but they didn’t fall.

She reached for the hem of the shirt, slowly easing it up.

My heart was racing. My breaths turned deep.

I tried keeping the lust at bay with the amount of fury filling me but seeing her lift her shirt made it impossible.

My mind knew that it was wrong, but my hands didn’t listen.

Neither did the guilt. The pale blue cotton stopped at the underside of her breasts, and she rubbed her fingers over the upper and inner portion of her ribs.

Lowering, my eyes strained, and I shook my head.

“It’s slightly red.” My fingers eased over the two welts I could make out. “I don’t see any bruising.”

“I guess I got lucky this time.”

Tauren’s lips were parted, and her lids were dropping as she stared up at me hovering above.

I laid back down beside her, but my hand didn’t move.

Was I still tracing over her skin? Moving to brush against the underside of her breast. Fuck, I was, and I couldn’t stop as I kept her stare.

When Tauren’s legs drew up with her knees bent, I had to stop myself from reaching down to touch her.

“What happened? Why did he hurt you? ”

“I…don’t remember anymore.” She reached up, grabbing my hand to slide under her shirt so that I’d be over her breast. “Reid…please.”

“You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I do. Reid.”

My fingers flexed but they didn’t move—not out of her shirt but not reaching in to tease her nipple either. I held still.

“You’re upset.”

“And I want you to make me better.”

“You don’t want that. You don’t…want me.”

Tauren bit against her bottom lip, turning on her side to face me. She lifted, easing in to press her lips against mine, only to pull back but stay close.

“I do want you.” Fingers grasped around my cock through my boxers. I moaned, moving forward, bringing my face closer to hers. “It’s always been us, Reid. It’ll always be us.”

“You promise?”

No…

The trees and mountains in the distance returned.

I couldn’t think about that night. About how although we didn’t go all the way and have sex, everything changed in that moment.

I loved her. Despite knowing it was wrong, despite having a girlfriend who I cared for…

despite morality, I gave myself to Tauren—my mind—my body—every dark little piece of me that shouldn’t have been broken to begin with.

I poured out every secret to her, every desire, when I should have been guarding what the two of us finally had.

I got so lost in having her that I hadn’t protected her.

I condemned her.

No…I condemned us all.