Page 4 of Ondine: Vol. 2

I nod, even though I know he can’t see it.

“Roger that,” I say and get going.

His team isn’t there. I made a wrong turn, which Sabbies keeps barking at me for. I just kind of lost track of which way was up or down. It’s fine. I pull myself into the back of a market stall, scaring the piss out of the family that runs it.

They decide to keep their mouths shut as I make my escape.

I get out of Chinatown without any of Man-ho’s men spotting me. I’m on my way to “the studio” a space Meier Protections rents and we use for…various reasons. The last time was to interview the man who shot at Freddie’s dad, the senator. My phone is trashed from swimming through the cistern. But I have the walkie, so I let Sabbies know on our channel we’ve been using.

When I get to the studio, I’m met with a manic Jake. He doesn’t let me past the door, I just shut behind me.

“Shadow!” He says with a big smile and large dilated eyes.

“Jake…” I respond. “I need to take a shower. Get new clothes. And my phone is all fucked up. Can you let me in?”

His face remains that smiley/scary face.

“What’s going on?” I sigh.

And then I realize why he’s blocking my way up the stairs.

He has someone in the interview room. Who on earth does Jake have? Is it Man-ho? Did he lift Man-ho?

I push past him and run up the stairs to the interview room. I look through the glass and see not Man-ho. But a young man strapped to a metal chair. He’s got red hair and very angry eyes.

Jake comes up behind me to look into the room with me. “Who the fuck is that?”

Jake pats me on the shoulder, and in a crude voice, replies, “Ondine insurance.”

2

The Past

Ondine

The first time I remember feeling alone, I was 11 years old. I’d awoken from a nap without any idea what time it was or the circumstances I was in before a nap. I was sticky and hot, and my throat was tight, so each breath I took was ineffective.

I wasn’t even sure I wasn’t still dreaming.

I woke up to an empty house. It was dark outside, but all the blinds and curtains were wide open. I walked around the large house calling out to my parents, but there was no sign of them anywhere. Their bed was still made. There wasn’t any new trash in the can. I didn’t see a car outside in the driveway. Since I was so young, I started to feel afraid. Every empty room or dark corner around me was now a place where something unknown and scary could happen. Was I really alone? Were my parents ok?

While we had a townhouse in Cash City, I was in the country-home out in the Far West. I barely even remember arriving there.

I curled up behind the couch up against the wall and cried. It took a long time for me to relax enough to think clearly. During that time, I imagined my parents having been kidnapped and murdered, and the bad guy was coming back for me. But eventually, I got the courage to call them.

It took even longer to get a hold of them.

“Ondine, if you call my phone this much, I will block you,” my mother said jokingly when she eventually answered. After sobbing to her that I was all alone in the house, she said, “I gave you a little something last night to help you sleep. Remember your father and I were leaving for Nepal this week? Our plane leaves in the morning, so we are already in the city. There’s money on the counter. Cary, Janine, and Robin will be by this weekend. I have it all there for you. We will call you in a few days!”

It sounded so logical at the time. I wiped my silly tears away. I found the money. I closed all the blinds and curtains. Of course, they’d already left. I can’t believe I lost it like that. My mom often gave me a sleeping aid, and it must have just been so strong I slept nearly 24 hours.

Resolved to stop being such a crybaby, I ordered a pizza and made myself at home in the den with the tv.

The pizza delivery boy and I became fast friends that summer. The staff, Cary, Janine, and Robin, stuck close to the house and made sure I had what I needed. But I didn’t need them. I was fine. Everything was fine. I didn’t need anyone to see me. My parents appreciated me for being so capable and independent. The less I called them, the happier they were to talk to me when they did call in. I turned 12 all on my own, and thenstarted middle school, too. I was really good at forging my dad’s signature.

I felt lonely a lot, but I’ve learned to wear it like a second skin. When my chest would get too cold. I’d take a hot bath. If the house was too dark and spooky, I’d find the moon.

I smile at the memories as Freddie sleeps soundly, wrapped around me. His face is buried in my ribs. His wide-set eyes and broad mouth are so soft and innocent looking while he sleeps. I can’t lose him. That’s all I keep thinking. I can’t lose him now that I have him.