Page 40 of On My Side (Quiblings #3)

Ren

Playlist: Growing Sideways | Noah Kahan

Quiblings Group Chat

Jo

so we got the pictures back from the launch party… and guess who’s missing from the FIRST FAMILY PHOTO INCLUDING JOSH AND HUNTER.

Nic

why, could it be lorenzo and emilia, giovanna?

Jo

why yes nicoletta, yes it could.

i hope you jerks leaving the most important night of my life early was worth it.

Millie

it high key wasn’t but also shut the fuck up.

Ren

i mean…speak for yourself.

Millie

i WAS

jesus christ give me a fucking break

Alex

we love you millie

Leo

ehhhhh, speak for yourself.

In. Out. In. Out. In… Fuck.

I forget to breathe, because there she is: on the coldest morning of the year so far, thermos in hand, and bundled up with a light blue hat with a pom-pom on top. Audrey and I reconvened our daily walks after we decided to officially date a few weeks ago.

I had assumed she wouldn’t come this morning due to a dramatic overnight drop in temperature. But here she is.

“Hey,” I huff, slowing to a stop and pulling out my earbud. “I’m surprised you braved the cold today.”

Audrey peers at me. Her scarf is wrapped so thoroughly around her face that only her gray eyes framed by her glasses are visible.

“I hate the cold,” she says, voice muffled by the scarf.

She gets to her feet. “I want to be inside. With a mocha. And a good book. Not outside. But I am outside because some sexy lunatic thinks it’s cool to run in the arctic tundra. ”

I smile and cup her waist, pulling her into me as I peel down her scarf. I silence her gasp when I capture her mouth with mine.

“ Ren ,” she gasps, looking around after breaking the kiss.

We’re still keeping our relationship to ourselves right now, and I know she’s nervous about anyone seeing us together, and what that would mean for me.

Personally, I think it would mean I’m the luckiest son of a bitch in the world.

“No one’s here,” I reassure her instead kissing across her jaw and down her neck. “Though I wish there was, I want everyone to know goddamn lucky I am. But unfortunately, they’re all inside with a mocha and good book…”

She grumbles and pulls away. “Dammit. You were being sweet and then you ruined it. Jerk.”

I pull her back to me, wrapping my arms around her waist. For as feisty as she is, her body relaxes against me, and she loops one arm around my shoulders. “Whatever you say, dear,” I murmur into her ear. “As long as I’m your jerk, and your sexy lunatic.”

She pulls her away and playfully shoves my chest while retching.

I laugh. “Too corny?”

“ Way too corny,” she agrees, wiggling her nose. “Corn casserole level.”

“Speaking of corn casserole,” I say, reaching forward and tugging her scarf over her nose. “What are you and Pipe doing for Thanksgiving?”

“Cheesecake for breakfast, a viewing of Miracle on 34th Street , and I go and cover breaks at the inn while Piper plays piano in the lobby. We do the same on Christmas, too.”

“Would you… um. Would you two want company?” I ask, staring intently at my cup.

“You don’t have plans with your family?” she asks, surprise lacing her voice.

I shrug. I don’t want to tell her I’m not too happy with my family after finding out how they treated Audrey when she was pregnant. Mom’s texts have gone unanswered, and I muted the sibling group chat. My dad called me last night, which is weird in itself, and I sent it to voicemail.

How am I supposed to look them in the eyes and act like everything’s normal when I learned they turned a pregnant teenager away?

Not just any pregnant teenager, but a girl who trusted them to support her?

A girl they welcomed in our home frequently until she was pregnant.

The entire concept of the religion that is so important to them is built on the back of a pregnant teenager.

When I was growing up, being a good Catholic meant being like Jesus.

Being kind, not excluding people, looking out for one another, praying…

not literally refusing to help someone they were more than capable of helping.

While I don’t put my parents on a pedestal, I always admired how their faith wasn’t something they used to harm others, even when I stopped practicing. Learning I’m wrong is a mindfuck.

“If you want to join us, you’re more than welcome to,” Audrey says gently, tilting my chin with the crook of her finger. “But I don’t want you to choose between us and your family.”

But what if I want you and Piper to be my family, too? I hold it back. That’s too much right now. We’ve done a really good job at moving slow, physically and emotionally, and I don’t want to make her feel rushed.

“I’m not really talking to my family,” I say slowly.

She cups my cheek with her mittened hand, and I can’t help but lean into the safety and security of her touch. “Ren, please tell me it’s not because of me.”

I exhale heavily. “It’s not. Not really. I’d be pissed to find out they treated anyone the way they treated you.” It’s unbearable because it was you .

She pulls her hand away, and I immediately miss her touch. “I don’t… Ren. You’ll resent me one day if you let me pull you away from your family. What happens when you realize that it was…” she trails off.

“It was what?”

“A waste. That I’m a waste of your time.”

I take a step towards her. “And what if I don’t?” I ask. “Let’s challenge that thought like you’ve been working on with Eva. What if I never think you’re a waste of time and next year you’re stuck watching the Star Wars holiday special with me?”

“The what ?”

“Lorenzo?” Audrey and I jump apart like two high schoolers caught making out at the way-too-familiar voice. I give Audrey an apologetic look, hoping she can read my true remorse in my eyes. “Is that you?”

“Hi, Mom,” I say, turning on my heel, and plastering my ‘Ren is always happy!’ smile on. My parents stare back at me, pickleball paddles in hand. Why they’re playing pickleball in this weather is beyond me.

“You haven’t texted me back,” is the next thing out of my mother’s mouth, and I have to go into overdrive to make sure my smile doesn’t falter. A faltering smile gives too much away.

“Right,” I say. I’m not certain if my cheeks hurt from smiling or the biting cold. Probably a little of both. “Sorry. Been, uh, busy…”

“Buddy, are we interrupting something?” My dad is pointing his paddle at Audrey, and I fight the urge to reach out and slap it out of his hand. “Are you going to introduce us to your friend?”

Damn my father’s overly friendly demeanor.

“No.” Now I fight the urge to slap myself because I answered way too fast.

“Lorenzo, baby. What’s going on?” My mom’s suddenly cupping my cheeks. “Is something wrong? Are you sick?”

“I’m fine, Mom.” My cheeks burn with embarrassment of being babied in front of Audrey. I’m a grown man, for god’s sake. “I’ve been—”

“Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Quinn,” Audrey says, stepping out from behind me. “It’s good to see you.”

I exhale, and face my parents. “Mom, Dad, you remember Audrey?”

Mom and Dad stare at Audrey, mouths agape as recognition sets in. “Audrey?” Mom says, blinking rapidly.

“Audrey!” Dad exclaims, a big grin spread across his face. “I knew I recognized you. It’s good to see you, sweetheart.” I watch in complete horror, still trapped in my mother’s vise-like grip, as Dad steps around me, arms outstretched to Audrey.

I pull out of Mom’s grasp and grab his shoulder to stop him. “Get away from her,” I snap.

“Okay, buddy,” Audrey says, placing her mittened hand on my shoulder. “I need you to chill out a degree or two, okay?”

I flush, knowing this is the voice she uses when Piper has big feelings.

She’s gentle-parenting me in front of my actual parents, who are currently staring at me like I’ve grown another head.

That’s fair, I kind of feel like I have.

A second head that is filled to capacity with Audrey’s smile and the way she holds her breath right before she…

“Audrey?” My mom asks, eyes darting between the two of us. “I didn’t know you knew Ren.”

“You mean Kat’s former best friend who was always around when I was a kid?” I throw my arm around Audrey’s shoulder and pull her into my side. “Yep. Her daughter is one of my private students.” The daughter she was pregnant with when you threw her out to the wolves, assholes .

“I thought you weren’t teaching private lessons anymore?” Mom says, and goddammit, of course that’s what she’s gonna focus on.

“I made an exception for Piper,” I answer calmly.

“Piper?” Mom asks, her gaze turned to Audrey. “Is that…?”

“My daughter,” Audrey finishes, and my heart breaks at the forced smile on her face. “Sorry to cut this short, but I should be going. I have a lot of laundry to do and…”

“Come to Thanksgiving dinner,” my mom blurts out, and judging by the expression on her face, I can’t tell who’s more surprised by the words that came out of her mouth—her, or the rest of us.

“Oh, I…” Audrey stammers, her fingers tapping nervously against her ceramic mug.

“The three of us will be working at the inn that day. Audrey owns the SandPiper Inn—did you know that? We’ll be working because it’s tradition for her and Piper to eat cheesecake for breakfast and then work so more of her employees can have the day off.

I’m doing that too this year.” I breathe deeply once I’ve finished word vomiting.

Mom’s eyes are sad, and I have to avert my gaze. “You’re not coming to Thanksgiving?”

“Kat doesn’t come to Christmas Eve anymore because they spend it with Steve’s family.

Alex will stay in LA. You don’t need me there, and believe it or not, not everyone wants Audrey to suffer on her own,” I snap, daring to meet my mom’s eyes.

Her eyes widen as she realizes what I’m saying, what I know.

And that just eggs me on. “Not everyone is—”

“Lorenzo.” Audrey’s voice is muffled beneath her scarf and barely audible above the pounding in my head and the crash of the waves of the shore. She slips her hand into mine and squeezes gently.