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Ben’s face goes taut, and I remember that Niko was the man he slept with, causing him to be removed from the priesthood. I tighten my grip on his hand.

“Is this a bad thing?” I ask quietly.

Ben runs a hand through his hair and sighs, “Mak, can we get a minute?”

“Yeah, of course. ” Mak leaves us and goes over to where Theo and the others are standing near the cat enclosures. Ben turns, but doesn’t look me in the eyes, instead scanning the crowd carefully over my head.

“After Niko and I slept together, everything in my life crashed and burned pretty fast,” he explains.

“I was laicized, so I had nowhere to go, I didn’t have much money, and my family wasn’t speaking to me.

My sister and her husband offered to help, but I was being self-destructive and stupid and I wouldn’t accept it.

I didn’t want to leave town, because of my abuelita , so I was either couch-surfing or living out of the car and…

I was drinking a lot, scamming people, making fake IDs just to be able to buy food and gas, stuff like that. It wasn’t good.

“Niko started calling me a few days after we slept together, and I just…ghosted him, because I was dealing with so much. After a few months, I finally got to the ‘anger’ stage of grief, and I called him back one night while I was drunk. I yelled at him, cussed him out, told him it was his fault, that he should’ve turned me down that night, that he shouldn’t have…

taken advantage of me being drunk. I said some really horrible things to him, Annie. ”

“Oh…” I murmur, unsure of how to reply. “Have you apologized?”

“No,” Ben says. “I haven’t spoken to him since, and he hasn’t tried to call me either. I was so ashamed, and I didn’t think he’d even want my apology, so I never tried. God-fucking-damnit ! This is not what I need today. This is not what Theo needs.”

“Does he know about this?” I ask, leaning to the side so I can see Theo, who is smiling and cradling a large, gray cat in his arms. Ben follows my gaze.

“No, he doesn’t. I hadn’t really had a reason to tell him yet.” He runs a hand over his face and groans softly.

“It will be alright.” I put my arms around him and try to give a reassuring hug, but his anxiety and tension is almost palpable.

“Come on, let’s j ust…go help Theo, and then maybe we can get some drinks and I can explain things to him,” he says, taking my hand again and leading me through the small gate into the fenced off adoption area.

I balk as we approach the cats. “Ben, I do not think this is a good idea. Remember how Dante and Virgil were?”

“Well, hey, you’ve changed a lot since then,” Ben says with a small smile.

“This might be a good test.” He keeps his grip on my hand and pulls me between the tables to where Theo is now holding a scrawny brown cat with massive green eyes and a pink nose.

Mak stands beside him, scratching the animal’s ears.

“He’s so sweet, Theo, and I really think he’d benefit from being the only animal in a house for a while since he was pulled out of a bad hoarding situation,” she is saying.

“I love him because he can’t really meow.

He just chirps and makes a funny sort of screaming noise.

When he came to us, he had a really tight ingrown collar, and the vet thinks it damaged his vocal cords. ”

“He’s cute, isn’t he?” Theo asks us as we approach.

Ben reaches out and pets the cat on the head, but Theo appears slightly nervous when I move forward.

I hope Ben is right, that I have changed enough since Dante and Virgil were around.

Perhaps this is a chance for me to show Theo.

The brown cat’s ears press back on his head when he sees me, and he shrinks into Theo’s arms slightly.

“Oh, he’s just overwhelmed,” Mak says. “It’s a lot of people all at once.”

I nod and stand back, but ask, “Does he have a name?”

“Not really. The shelter manager’s daughter named him Brownie, but…” She makes a face and then her eyes light up. “Oh, Theo! Have you found a new job yet?”

“No,” Theo sighs, sliding the brown cat back into his cage and closing the door. “I’ve been looking, but…nothing good has come up.”

Mak gets a rather devious sparkle in her eye.

“Well, the shelter is looking for a new kennel attendant…” she says slowly, “maybe someone who also has a little marketing experience…to do some website and social media stuff. They don’t have their own dedicated person for that, and I do a lot of it as a volunteer, but…

I might have mentioned your name to Aileen. If you’re interested!”

“That…that actually sounds great, Makie,” says Theo, a rush of enthusiasm in his voice. He looks at me and Ben and his face breaks into a genuine smile. “I could use a change from working in an office anyway, I think.”

“Really?!” Mak squeaks, clapping her hands together. “Oh, this is so great! Aileen’s here today if you want to talk to her!”

“Sure, let’s do it.”

Mak whips her phone out and walks away, while Theo moves closer to the cage with the brown cat in it.

“I kinda like this guy,” he says to Ben, looking over his shoulder. “What do you think?”

Ben shrugs. “He looks mangy, but I’m not a cat expert.”

“He’s a bit skinny, yeah,” Theo laughs. “Nothing a little love and kibble can’t fix, right?”

“You do like to take in strays, don’t you, osito ?” Ben says, grabbing Theo around the waist and kissing the side of his head. Theo snorts and wraps his fingers through Ben’s. I stand back, watching them and letting the strange human emotions swirl through my stomach and chest.

After a few minutes, Mak returns accompanied by Aileen, the shelter manager, so Ben and I quietly slip away toward the bar. He keeps his tight hold on my hand, and his eyes dart restlessly around the crowd, probably looking for Niko.

“What are all these drinks?” I ask, picking up a short menu from a table.

“Here.” Ben takes the paper from me and scans it.

“I think I know what you’ll like. Oh, I forgot.

I made you something while I was gone.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small, rectangular plastic card with a photograph of me on it.

I recognize it as a picture he took in Theo’s living room one day while he was trying to show me how his phone works.

“This is…”

“A driver’s license, so you seem like a real person. Now, I’m not gonna let you take the car out or anything, but this will at least get you drinks when we go out.”

“You made this for me?”

Ben laughs and glances around. “Yeah, but don’t tell anyone or I could get arrested. If you want me in handcuffs, you just have to ask.” He gives me a wink and my heart skips a beat when I see the name he has printed on the card.

“Annika Keating de la Cruz…”

His grin widens. “Has a nice ring to it, I think.”

“I love it.” I press the card to my chest and go up on my toes to kiss him.

“I do too,” he murmurs against my lips. “Now, let’s introduce you to Fireball, shall we?”